[philopsychology]

In particular i am trying to figure out why my younger brother acts the way he does. I am a year older my brother and for as long as I can remember whenever me and him are around my dad my brother will act gay around me. I am not joking, he knows it upsets me yet he will do the WEIRDEST stuff. For example he will literally grab my *** and giggle like he is gay and just do really weird stuff. He basically tries to antagonize me but i don't understand why. My dad is a huge narcissist who treats me and my brother like inferior beings whenever we are around him btw. When me and my brother aren't around my dad though my brother will stop acting gay and basically act exactly like my dad. I am 20 and my brother is 19 and this has been going on since i was 5 years old. Anyways fyi, my brother isn't gay. I believe he acts like that to make me upset and he will fake laugh at me and ask if i'm mad in a sarcastic way while he is acting gay. The sad part is i've always been a nice person and i feel like if i wasn't and i just punched him in the face he would never do this again, but idk. Anyways, i don't understand the psychology going on in my "family" but i'd like to figure it out. Also, my dad thinks i am like him even though i don't see any similarity. I tried to fight the way my family is and change it because i freaking hate it and i am sick of them but i've pretty much given up because it is like talking to cavemen. I am a deep thinker but am extremely depressed due to my upbringing and how much it has messed me and my life up. I've always wanted to have a good family and have tried everything to reason with them but they are a bunch of idiots who can't stop their weird destructive cycle. Honestly my dad and brother feel like bullies to me because they are always trying to make me feel bad. I think they are just pathetic weirdos so they bully me differently than a normal person might bully someone even though their intentions are the same. I honestly feel like a male version of Meg from family guy, just constantly picked on by a bunch of weirdos who i have to call my family. It disgusts me that i have to call them my family. Anyways sorry if this is all hard to understand and all over the place, i am just too depressed to put much effort into anything these days.

[healingme4me]

How much longer are you living under the same roof?

Your brothers behavior might be in receiving favor with your father. Hard to know.

[Fizzyo]

Is there any way of moving out so you get a break? Hard to understand why people are mean. I hope you find a way forward soon.

[philopsychology]

Originally Posted by healingme4me

How much longer are you living under the same roof?

Your brothers behavior might be in receiving favor with your father. Hard to know.

This only happens nowadays when i visit my dad and my brother is there too. I live with my mom now, but my brother is usually here. Without my dad around my brother is just an asshole (am i allowed to curse on this site?). Unfortunately i don't see myself getting out of here anytime soon unless i want to take a big risk with my life because i'm not even in college and i'd be basically broke. I wanted to join the military ever since i was a kid but at like 16 i developed a ligament/tendon disorder that made it basically impossible for me to join so now im pretty much stuck here. My brother is probably going to move out in like a year to go off to uni tho.

[philopsychology]

Oh btw after re-reading my post i noticed that when i said "my dad thinks i am like him" it might have sounded like i meant that my dad thinks i am similar to my brother but what i meant is that my dad thinks i am similar to himself. I thought that saying that piece of info might somehow help others to understand the dynamics of my family better.

[philopsychology]

Originally Posted by healingme4me

How much longer are you living under the same roof?

Your brothers behavior might be in receiving favor with your father. Hard to know.

Maybe, but to me it feels more like he is just trying to piss me off and be in control of whatever it is he wants to control in his sick head. It's hard to describe, but being a heterosexual male it is very upsetting to be a part of his weird little act where he treats me gay by him touching me and doing his little act. I can only compare it to a male monkey raping another male to show dominance. Obviously if he ever tried that **** with me i would beat the pulp out of him but that's also the thing, he knows i'm not really "allowed" to do anything when he "harmlessly" acts gay around me and touches me. That is why it is so upsetting when he asks me "are you mad?" because he knows i am and it is like he is rubbing it in that i'm not allowed to do anything about it. My dad doesn't even care about the way my brother treats me and when i stand up for myself i'm the one that gets in trouble. Basically i'm picked on and no one gives a ****, and the worst part is i never did anything to deserve it. Throughout my life whenever my brother or father has needed me i have always been there for them and yet they repay me by treating me like crap. It is really hard not to turn into a cold hearted person when i have to live with trash 24/7. I seriously wish they were dead tbh, but i hate feeling this way because i don't like being a bitter and angry person.

[philopsychology]

Fyi, this is only one of the ways my family ****s around with me and treats me like ****. My whole life has honestly just been torture. I feel like i've always been the victim of my familys abuse and i wish there was a way to get justice without loosing my morals and going to jail because i hate the unfairness of my situation.

[Fizzyo]

[Joshden]

By the sounds of it, your father prefers your brother to you. This thing about your brother acting gay around you when you're round your fathers house could be to impress you parent. Have you got a good relationship with your mother?

It sounds like your father and brother are no good to you and even thou you are family, you may need to cut them off if they are causing stress and wellbeing illnesses. Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind and this sounds like a good example of what that saying means.

You need to remove yourself from the situation, so move on. She if you can move in with a friend or someone who cares about you where your brother or father can not access you. One day your brother will change, and when that happens he will come and find you. You should be thinking of your own wellbeing before anyone else

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[Fuzzybear]

[philopsychology]

Originally Posted by Joshden

By the sounds of it, your father prefers your brother to you. This thing about your brother acting gay around you when you're round your fathers house could be to impress you parent. Have you got a good relationship with your mother?

It sounds like your father and brother are no good to you and even thou you are family, you may need to cut them off if they are causing stress and wellbeing illnesses. Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind and this sounds like a good example of what that saying means.

You need to remove yourself from the situation, so move on. She if you can move in with a friend or someone who cares about you where your brother or father can not access you. One day your brother will change, and when that happens he will come and find you. You should be thinking of your own wellbeing before anyone else

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Yeah I agree. It's funny cuz i just recently told him to go screw himself and that i was done talking to him. I barely ever stand up to his bs so i was pretty proud of myself in that moment.