[knightfallsbelow]

Heck, I'll stop beating around the bush. I want to die. I don't find joy in anything anymore. I feel like a failure when it comes to my husband. I just want it all to end.

[WhatDayIsItAgain]

Escaping your current emotions is a valid goal and there are several ways to lessen this burden and recover joy for yourself. I am just starting ssri treatment for depression myself. Reaching out and telling how you feel is a strong positive action for yourself. It will get better and they have 24 hr crisis hotlines available to speak to someone on the phone privately if you would be interested.

[knightfallsbelow]

I've been through the gambit of ssris they didn't work. My psychiatrist has me on something that isn't an Ssri. The ssris would work for about a month then I would be right back where I started from. The stuff they have me on now is working, slowly. My suicidal days are fewer, but I still,have days of intense feelings of wanting to die. The thought is always there but some days it's more manageable I guess you could say. And then there are days like today....

I get you.
It's very painful.

Please don't give up hope. None of us know what is in the future.

[elevatedsoul]

yts,,, i knoe....
hve yoi tried marijuana..?

for me its am thing that can relieve alot my seymptoms....

i knowe how yoi feel...

dont end it all - dont do it for me..., mfor everyone here.,,, foor yiir husband,,,,
im going thoiugh same thing asl you ....

[knightfallsbelow]

I have not tried marijuana. It's not legal here but if it were....

One day at a time is what I keep getting told. So I made it through yesterday, what will today be like?

[Pierro]

There is no magic pill with any meds, we have to keep working until we find some sort of common ground, that is, the meds help me but I have to do a lot of the legwork myself. It has taken me 4 years to get where I am and I am lucky it has only taken this short length of time to get some relief from this nightmare. Don't get me wrong, I have had depression all my life but the last few years have really taken it toll. I know what it feels like. I am sorry you feel so low, you deserve to be the very best that you can be, thats why you need to seek professional help immediately if you are thinking of carrying out ending your life.

[knightfallsbelow]

Oh how I wish there were some magical pill. I would be all over that. Yeah, I know it takes lots of leg work in n my part. And I have started that process. I have a psychologist that I really like. I have been seeing him for only a month now so I'm not expecting miracles. All I want is the thought of ending it all to go away. I am now on my second day of intense feelings of ending it. I know it's not right. I know it is wrong. I know how crushing it would be to my husband, but the urge is very strong. I will continue to fight it, I will continue to cry and I will continue to lean on my husband for support. I don't see my psychologist until Tuesday so I have to manage until then.