[ubicaritasetamor]

Hi,

I just joined here. Anyways, I've been really struggling with anxiety and depression the last few months and I'm not sure what to do. I have been suicidal for a while now and I guess I'm just looking for suggestions on how others have dealt with this. I can't sleep anymore and my friends aren't the type of people who discuss serious topics...if I can actually call them sincere friends, I'm not sure anymore. I was considering getting help but after finding out I'm losing my job just a couple weeks ago and about to graduate college so I don't exactly have much money just lying around I'm not sure financially it's an option. My family is unsupportive (as are my friends) of getting help for mental illness to begin with (i.e. that's for "crazy" people) Thanks for any suggestions you may have to feel better.

[Skeezyks]

Hello ubicaritasetamor: The Skeezyks welcomes you to PsychCentral! May you find the time you spend here to be of benefit.

I'm sorry you are having such a difficult time. I understand what it is like to be struggling with depression, anxiety & suicidal thoughts. I battle each of these monsters every day... & I have made serious attempts to get rid of myself a couple of times. Only you know how serious your suicidal thinking is. But under any circumstances suicidal thinking is nothing to mess around with, or to try to dismiss. So, from my perspective, it is really important for you to reach out, in real life, to someone for help. I know how difficult this can be when there's no one around you who will listen, understand & help. You're just stuck in this very dark place with, seemingly, nowhere to turn. Actually this is, in part, characteristic of suicidal thinking. One's perspective with regard to one's range of options narrows to the point where it seems there are simply no alternatives.

You mentioned you are about to graduate college. Is there a student counseling center you could go to? Are there perhaps some free or income-based mental health services in your area? You could call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1 (800) 273-8255). They may be able to suggest some services that may be available in your area. But even if they cannot, at least this would give you someone to talk to on the phone. One doesn't even have to be suicidal to call. They advertise they're there to help with any problem.

Beyond that, certainly, continue posting here on PC. There are many knowledgeable & caring members here. The more you post, & reply to other members' posts, the more connected to the community you will become. I wish you well...

[Fuzzybear]

[ubicaritasetamor]

Thank you both for responding. Idk I'm starting to think it's getting more serious than I would like it to be. I'm not sure if I'm allowed to say this here but I have thought of a "plan" but I am holding out on it as long as I can but it's just like there's a big cloud hanging over me and sometimes it almost feels like I'm counting down the days to the inevitable. Yes, there is student counseling but unfortunately it takes about a month to get an intake appointment and I graduate in 2 weeks and after that I can't utilize their services. I don't think it's wise for me to call any numbers because I am on a phone plan with other members of my family and all our calls sync together (so we can all see our own calls and each other's phone calls)--we don't necessarily want it this way, just haven't been able to successfully change it and have learned to live with it. I have utilized chat services online a few times in the last couple of weeks that have been pretty good and they helped to an extent. It was mostly just a script though so it was a little impersonal... I've looked into a couple therapists where I am currently located but I am trying to find a job for the summer (at least) first before I commit to one... Or maybe I'm just treating this as more of an option than it actually is... I'm not sure.

Thank you both for the welcome and hope you're having a good day today!