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#1
May 07, 2016, 02:10 AM
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I am confused. I know what I have been doing the last week-in-a-half is wrong. I know that if it continues I will end up a drug addict. But yet, what if the only way you feel normal is when you're high. What if when you're high you can laugh, actually laugh. What if you see a brighter world. I know that this should stop but, I really don't see how stopping is a good thing. I know that if I do I will be a shell of who I really am. A shell waiting for the day that this all ends. Which would I rather have, a shell that hates life, or a druggie that wants to live high to high. What have I become? Am I just trying to end my life happily? Why can't I be happy sober? Is this my new life?
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 Clara22, Fizzyo
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#2
May 07, 2016, 06:52 AM
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jman it may seem like a solution but it is an illusion because it is not sustainable. Depending on what you are doing you know the high won't last, using will destroy your health, destroy your bank account, and destroy any relationships you have now. Prescribed, monitored help is the only way to have any hope of a sustainable solution. If you continue you'll need help with both problems and will have a much, much harder struggle to pull yourself to wellness.
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------------------------------------ --  -- The world is what we make of it -- -- Dave -- www.idexter.com |
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#3
May 07, 2016, 08:00 AM
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Jman, you are self medicating right now. You need some help and need to see a therapist and pdoc to help work through the problems for which you are self medicating.
Using drugs will only hurt your body in the end and can make some mental illnesses worse. You can feel happy again without drugs but you need to do the work with a T and pdoc. It may even get worse before it gets better but it will get better. ((Hugs)) Seesaw Sent from my SM-N910V using Tapatalk
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 What if I fall? Oh, my dear, but what if you fly? Primary Dx: C-PTSD and Severe Chronic Treatment Resistant Major Depressive Disorder Secondary Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder with mild Agoraphobia. Meds I've tried: Prozac, Zoloft, Celexa, Effexor, Remeron, Elavil, Wellbutrin, Risperidone, Abilify, Prazosin, Paxil, Trazadone, Tramadol, Topomax, Xanax, Propranolol, Valium, Visteril, Vraylar, Selinor, Clonopin, Ambien Treatments I've done: CBT, DBT, Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS), Talk therapy, psychotherapy, exercise, diet, sleeping more, sleeping less... |
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#4
May 09, 2016, 03:22 PM
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Jman, the drugs may help now, but they will stop helping and you will still need to take them. You will not die happy, you will be in a bigger nightmare, but I understand the temptation! Just to feel OK for a minute.
It will make you pay, steal your home and whatever little you have. I guess you heard this a million times! At the end of the day it is your choice and no one can make that choice for you. Whatever you choose I send warm caring wishes. 
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