[dexter]

The Orlando shooting has me filled with grief tonight. I had been doing OK up until today. It is not primarily the tragedy but the event plus all of the negative conversation exploding around it. Politics, Trump, gun control, anti-Muslim stuff really upsets me, people saying the victims deserved it, the political hypocrisy, the people calling out the political hypocrisy, SHUT UP already and let people grieve for the victims for a microsecond.

I was dealing with it and tonight another news report just triggered a lot of grief and I'm alone here and having trouble coping with it.

[adam_k]

I can't cope with the news so I don't watch it.

The incident is a real tragedy. 49 people should still be breathing today and it is just the actions of one man that changed that. There are 49 families that won't be the same.

My wife was watching the filibuster yesterday and I watched it to. I almost cried several times when the senators talked about their stories and other tragedies. I would have cried if she wasn't around but I have a hard time crying in front of people.

It's a lot of sadness and grief to absorb.

[Ceara1010]

I know.

It's particularly sad that the killing of people belonging to one discriminated-against group is being used to justify discriminating even more against another discriminated-against group.

It's crazy.

--Ceara1010

[Crypts_Of_The_Mind]

Best advice I can give you is to do as I used to do: turn the channel when the news or anything about the news came on tv, refuse to allow news magazines or newspapers in the house, and if anyone mentioned a news event - ask them to change topic, if they refuse, leave the room or distract yourself with something to ensure you do not hear it, if you are online and it pops up - change sites or "x" out the ad, delete the post, or surf to another page, if you are online chatting with someone ask them to change topic and why and if they refuse block them.

I did all that for a few years - I spiraled if I watched news at all so I just stopped. The last year I have been able to watch it again but it took awhile. You have to look after yourself and there is no shame in it.

If it helps you any at all though - I will say there are people out there who believe it to have been staged by the government and filmed by crisis actors and the media - in that scenario it would mean a bunch of people got paid a huge amount of money to play their parts well, the "dead" were then relocated somewhere to "disappear", their families given scripts, etc ... but nobody really died ... the only thing that would have happened was a lot of ppl got rich, the nation and world got duped, and Obama got another chance to ask for guns to be taken away. So- if it helps to think perhaps they may really be alive, try that...then, just don't listen to the news anymore

*hugs*

[dexter]

Originally Posted by Ceara1010

It's particularly sad that the killing of people belonging to one discriminated-against group is being used to justify discriminating even more against another discriminated-against group.

Exactly, Ceara. I was upset about a lot of the anti-Muslim stuff going around even before Trump blew it up. It was a contributing factor to my depression relapse. To see it back in this context is extremely hurtful, and painful for me.

Thank you for your post.

[Ceara1010]

Originally Posted by dexter

Exactly, Ceara. I was upset about a lot of the anti-Muslim stuff going around even before Trump blew it up. It was a contributing factor to my depression relapse. To see it back in this context is extremely hurtful, and painful for me.

Thank you for your post.

You are very welcome.

I think about this a lot, particularly because my family is bigoted against Muslims and won't listen to anything that doesn't support their biases--but they are kind of like that about everything--very knee-jerk.

If anything, Trump's bigotry actually motivated me to start reading all I could, and watching documentaries, about Muslims in both America and the Middle East, including the complicated history of the conflicts in the Middle East--you know, all the tribalism and the Shiite vs. Sunni thing and which country swings which way.

I took a great class once where the professor taught us that it's much harder to be afraid of a country/culture if you study their history as this will usually help you understand their present. It's usually lack of understanding that causes fear. I've never forgotten this, and he's been proven right every time I follow his advice.

I don't agree with a lot of the aspects of Muslim culture, and some aspects I can't stand, and being tolerant doesn't mean I have to agree.

But I'm not afraid of Muslims. I'm afraid of terrorists.

--Ceara1010

[Takeshi]

I anticipated my reaction to the event, I know it's irresponsible of me to not observe and think how people are reacting right now, it's not understatement to say that things that's probably happening right now would make me wanna end my life, so I say you dexter, you're fairing pretty well. I don't think it's completely wrong to guard yourself from the noise on the media, just try to start with yourself.

I need a big reset on these type of big news, a tragic news, I can't break myself down, man. It's like a cell phone call or a doorbell, I don't have to answer that right away.

Crypts_Of_The_Mind, how'd you know about the conspiracy? I'm not really asking 'cos I'm not really listening to them. It's like already??

Let us redraw the equation this time around.

i really don't understand what people gain from shooting inocent people, it's just wrong on so many levels

i'm sorry it's affecting you so bad

[ErBear24]

Thank you so much for posting this. You are not alone in have this problem too when I hear about tragedies in the news etc. I put myself in the victims' shoes all the time and think of their suffering and the grieving families. I cannot watch the news and I just went into a relapse about a sad story I heard before this happened. And then I ruminate these things. Plus it makes me mad that people are so concerned about LGBT communities and such because this country has bigger problems it needs to deal with.

[dexter]

Originally Posted by Takeshi

I anticipated my reaction to the event, I know it's irresponsible of me to not observe and think how people are reacting right now...

I don't think it is irresponsible, it is the ultimate in responsibility to yourself which has to come first.

I am trying to do the same. I'm doing OK not blocking everything but trying to find and implement my limits is proving hard. Doing better though.

[handheart]

Today society wants us to be sad unhappy anxious etc ,trust me .Its controled by Iluminati ,hope i will not have problems by saying that.Be a smart person and dont listen all bulshit that its on tv news etc .They just want to wash our brains

[Takeshi]

Originally Posted by dexter

I don't think it is irresponsible, it is the ultimate in responsibility to yourself which has to come first.

I am trying to do the same. I'm doing OK not blocking everything but trying to find and implement my limits is proving hard. Doing better though.

How about better self-care then? Knowing or not knowing, you did many of us a favor by creating this thread. So, thank you, dexter.

You reply was a very good news, I'm glad that you're coping as best as you could.

It actually helps to think of myself as a bit irresponsible if I'm not catching up on the world's news, doing the best I could. The truth often times hurts. It does more than sobering me up and goes beyond, I used to block everything out just till recently, it could really disrupt the personal lives and skew the views if it persists, so we need to watch out for that.

To remedy that problems, The current event section on this site, John Oliver and Colbert, they are all good and help me. I don't subscribe to the Trump news too much, I know I need to get into that soon. What would you do if your wife insists on watching the stupid main stream news and you can't change the channel? The bad news lingers in our heads, may be causing some damage without knowing.

The social problems need to be addressed and hopefully solved responsibly, wouldn't you agree?

The world is sick. That is the premise of the world that I feel responsibility for. Good luck everyone.

[Ceara1010]

Originally Posted by Takeshi

It actually helps to think of myself as a bit irresponsible if I'm not catching up on the world's news, doing the best I could. The truth often times hurts. It does more than sobering me up and goes beyond, I used to block everything out just till recently, it could really disrupt the personal lives and skew the views if it persists, so we need to watch out for that.

A long time ago, when my illness first started to become debilitating, I went through a several year period where it was much to painful to keep up with what was going on. On my best days, i could only handle John Stewart's delivery of what was happening, but often that was too much, too.

When I pulled out of that state, I couldn't believe what had happened all that time, and have been determined not to get that way again. I have a lot of trouble with isolating, and keeping in touch with the world helps me stay connected to people. It also helps me keep a perspective on my own situation.

Like you, I tune out the talk about Trump and I watch John Oliver religiously. I also Samantha Bee and Bill Maher. (I need humor in my life to deal with life. )

--Ceara1010

[speckofdust]

Thanks for posting about this. I am still having a hard time listening to a lot of the coverage on TV and reading about it on social media. I tend to think about how people are just going about their everyday lives with no idea of what's about to happen. It's so cruel. As someone else mentioned, there are 49 people no longer going about life because one person decided to act on some irrational fear and deep-seated hatred.

I was a mess at my last appt with my T, and my sadness and anxiety about what happened in Orlando were a big part of it. Although I am somewhat disconnected from other people, it does hurt when I think about average people going about their merry way and then being ambushed like that.

This is a very round a bout way of me saying that I had to have a self-imposed ban on news and social media for a few days so that I could get through the day. I actually found that cutting off from those things freed up my mind and heart. I think I am going to set aside at least two days per week where I ignore Facebook, Twitter, CNN, etc.

I hope that we can all heal quickly from this tragedy. I wish we could feel confident that something like this won't happen again.

Sent from my XT1080 using Tapatalk

[dexter]

Originally Posted by Ceara1010

...On my best days, i could only handle John Stewart's delivery of what was happening, but often that was too much, too.

...

Like you, I tune out the talk about Trump and I watch John Oliver religiously. I also Samantha Bee and Bill Maher. (I need humor in my life to deal with life. )

--Ceara1010

That may not be a good solution for everyone but it happens to be a great solution for me. My sleep has still been irregular so I haven't been able to catch these shows regularly (I haven't even really checked out the new guy Trevor on The Daily Show yet) but humor works for me more importantly it is humor supporting ideas and ideals that I support.

It helps me greatly to see stories and images of people bonding during any tragedy. Mr. Rogers said "Look for the helpers. If you can find the helpers, there is hope." (I posted the video of Mr. Rogers on my Facebook Timeline recently.) I think I like this kind of thing because in the midst of a few individuals demonstrating the worst part of human nature, you always see large communities, sometimes the whole world, demonstrating the best part of human nature in response. To me that is not only hopeful, but bonding.

I believe the world is full of good and bad. While I never like for bad like this to happen, I do know it exists, and I try to see it as an opportunity for society to bond and grow.

The Orlando event shook my confidence in this I think because of the volume of hatred that has been exposed because of it. And the sheer arguing instead of bonding.

But the good is there, it is becoming a little harder to find it. I'm still looking for it and trying to figure out where I can participate toward helping the healing and the enlightenment of society instead of just watching it all go by. A difficult thing when one is stulted by depression, but I'm working on it.

[dexter]

LOL I went off topic there but my agreement comes from the fact that often when I watch these comedy news shows I do feel like I am bonding with people who also want a better world by calling out the BS.

[starryprince]

Originally Posted by dexter

The Orlando shooting has me filled with grief tonight. I had been doing OK up until today. It is not primarily the tragedy but the event plus all of the negative conversation exploding around it. Politics, Trump, gun control, anti-Muslim stuff really upsets me, people saying the victims deserved it, the political hypocrisy, the people calling out the political hypocrisy, SHUT UP already and let people grieve for the victims for a microsecond.

I was dealing with it and tonight another news report just triggered a lot of grief and I'm alone here and having trouble coping with it.

Hey Dexter! I just wanted to let you know that you're not alone in your grief. As a queer person of color, this really hit me hard too. I was telling a friend that queer individuals don't live anymore. We survive. There's a difference between living and surviving. It's like we're being taught to be hypervigilant because of who we are and that's wrong. We should be able to live carefree and without fear. It's horrible. For the people who are saying that the victims deserved it, I can't understand how people could have so much hatred in their hearts for strangers. The anti-Muslim statements are also really terrifying. This situation involves two oppressed groups who are both struggling to survive in this world when they're just met with hatred. It's a very tragic situation. My heart really goes out to everyone who was affected by this tragic turn of events. It's really not fair. They just wanted to have a good time. It's so sad.

Please, do your best to take care of yourself!

[dexter]

Thank you starryprince