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Old Sep 04, 2016, 09:04 AM
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JustJace2u JustJace2u is offline
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I have MDD but lately I have found myself not crying so much. The depression is definitely still there I can tell because I constantly feeling down and worrying about this that and the other. I was discussing this with someone on FB last night and I seem to be one who only cries in private. Heaven forbid I cry in public, such as at work, having someone ask me what's wrong and having to tell them I don't know what the f is wrong with me. I guess sometimes I question myself and the diagnoses, hence my reason for going to seek a second opinion. I just want to know what the heck is going on
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  #2  
Old Sep 04, 2016, 09:45 AM
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First off I am not sure if you are a man or woman. I will give you my personal opinion as it relates to me.

I try very hard not to cry at all. I will try everything in my power not to be seen crying in public. The reason for this is I am a man. As a man I view it as a sign of weakness for a man to cry for any reason. I don't even like to cry in front of my wife. Call it sexist if you want, I don't care, but I don't have a problem with a woman crying. Women are expected to be more emotional. Also when you cry you draw attention to yourself. Whether that is your intention or not you do. I absolutely hate being the center of attention.
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  #3  
Old Sep 04, 2016, 10:54 AM
Anonymous37901
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I don't cry. If I do it's the middle of the night, on my own, and I'm pretty drunk.

I'm very private when it comes to my emotions...
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  #4  
Old Sep 04, 2016, 11:29 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Humpty Dumpty View Post
First off I am not sure if you are a man or woman. I will give you my personal opinion as it relates to me.

I try very hard not to cry at all. I will try everything in my power not to be seen crying in public. The reason for this is I am a man. As a man I view it as a sign of weakness for a man to cry for any reason. I don't even like to cry in front of my wife. Call it sexist if you want, I don't care, but I don't have a problem with a woman crying. Women are expected to be more emotional. Also when you cry you draw attention to yourself. Whether that is your intention or not you do. I absolutely hate being the center of attention.
I'm a female :-)
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Current meds: 100mg Wellbutrin; 200mg Lamictal; 400mg Seroquel at night; Xanax 1mg/PRN; 100mg/PRN Trazodone at night for insomnia
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  #5  
Old Sep 04, 2016, 11:31 AM
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Originally Posted by HalloweenSkye View Post
I don't cry. If I do it's the middle of the night, on my own, and I'm pretty drunk.

I'm very private when it comes to my emotions...
I'm glad I'm not alone in this feeling. People are always telling me I look happy and as if nothing is wrong. If they only knew what was going on inside me, especially right now with some life changes I'm going through.
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Dx: BP2 and MDD

Current meds: 100mg Wellbutrin; 200mg Lamictal; 400mg Seroquel at night; Xanax 1mg/PRN; 100mg/PRN Trazodone at night for insomnia
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  #6  
Old Sep 04, 2016, 11:36 AM
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I only cry when I'm alone. I'm female too. Sometimes I wish I could get all weepy in front of others because otherwise all they have to go on is me telling them with words how terrible I feel. It's like people don't get it unless you turn on the waterworks. So I have a problem with nobody knowing how down I am. I've cried twice in front of people in the last ten years. I don't like crying in front of others though so it's a catch-22. I'm just not a tearful person and if I am crying then things are very very bad.
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  #7  
Old Sep 04, 2016, 12:56 PM
Anonymous32451
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i cry all the time- even at things that arn't worth getting upset about.. i'm really emotional
once i start, it's so hard to stop me
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  #8  
Old Sep 04, 2016, 02:39 PM
Unrigged64072835 Unrigged64072835 is offline
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I think the last time I cried was in 1999 before my second hospitalization. I haven't been able to cry since then. I mean it doesn't happen, even when I'm really depressed. It's hard for people to realize how sad I am because I don't cry. And I'm female, btw.
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  #9  
Old Sep 04, 2016, 09:16 PM
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I do not like to cry. I have cried twice in therapy and it made me so upset because I hate to cry. I was always told it was a sign of weakness and I am a lady. Crying makes me feel worse so I try not to cry. I cry a lot when I am by myself.
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  #10  
Old Sep 04, 2016, 10:09 PM
Always Hurting Always Hurting is offline
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Sometimes I find myself getting tears in my eyes over something I read or watched on tv. If I can relate it touches me and I get a little emotional. I always keep this hidden from others and only do so when I'm alone at home. I never cry in public because I don't want to appear weak or just plain weird. About once a year I'll have a real long cry due to my depression. I will bawl my eyes out and get it all out of me. I only allow myself to do this once a year and of course in private. I am very, very good at stuffing my emotions down deep inside myself so that I don't get caught crying. I have to appear like the strong one. The one who has it together. I am a female by the way.
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  #11  
Old Sep 04, 2016, 10:44 PM
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I hate crying because I know it's weak, but I love it at the same time for how amazing it feels. Yet I don't know if it's medication or just new development, but I haven't been able to cry in almost two months, which is basically a record for me.

When I did though, the only person I ended up crying in front of was my mom, and I even hated that. I would never cry in public or in therapy.
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  #12  
Old Sep 05, 2016, 05:04 AM
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I have put up with people using tears as a weapon and a tool so many times - people who have learned to turn it on and off like a smooth tap - when there is nothing wrong other than they want their way. I don't cry any more - not in public or in private - sober or drunk. Have been told off many times over the years for being a cry baby and attention seeking even when grieving for close relatives, friends and pets, that I just stopped. Don't show emotions at all any more - not sadness, grief, anger. Just a steely face - and in recent years have been told I am 'heartless', cold, etc particularly by those who show emotion at the drop of a hat, seeking attention. I have lost so many friends and family relationships because of my "coldness and heartlessness" - the very same people who have told me I am disallowed from showing emotion. Go figure.
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  #13  
Old Sep 05, 2016, 05:47 AM
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bioChE bioChE is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JustJace2u View Post
I have MDD but lately I have found myself not crying so much. The depression is definitely still there I can tell because I constantly feeling down and worrying about this that and the other. I was discussing this with someone on FB last night and I seem to be one who only cries in private. Heaven forbid I cry in public, such as at work, having someone ask me what's wrong and having to tell them I don't know what the f is wrong with me. I guess sometimes I question myself and the diagnoses, hence my reason for going to seek a second opinion. I just want to know what the heck is going on
I don't cry. I feel too detached.
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  #14  
Old Sep 05, 2016, 08:20 AM
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JustJace2u JustJace2u is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sula B View Post
I have put up with people using tears as a weapon and a tool so many times - people who have learned to turn it on and off like a smooth tap - when there is nothing wrong other than they want their way. I don't cry any more - not in public or in private - sober or drunk. Have been told off many times over the years for being a cry baby and attention seeking even when grieving for close relatives, friends and pets, that I just stopped. Don't show emotions at all any more - not sadness, grief, anger. Just a steely face - and in recent years have been told I am 'heartless', cold, etc particularly by those who show emotion at the drop of a hat, seeking attention. I have lost so many friends and family relationships because of my "coldness and heartlessness" - the very same people who have told me I am disallowed from showing emotion. Go figure.
People can definitely be cruel at times. Thankfully I've never had anyone be that mean to me.
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Current meds: 100mg Wellbutrin; 200mg Lamictal; 400mg Seroquel at night; Xanax 1mg/PRN; 100mg/PRN Trazodone at night for insomnia
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  #15  
Old Sep 05, 2016, 08:20 AM
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Originally Posted by bioChE View Post
I don't cry. I feel too detached.
Maybe that's my issue. Who knows?
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Dx: BP2 and MDD

Current meds: 100mg Wellbutrin; 200mg Lamictal; 400mg Seroquel at night; Xanax 1mg/PRN; 100mg/PRN Trazodone at night for insomnia
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  #16  
Old Sep 05, 2016, 01:28 PM
Eamgr Eamgr is offline
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It happened to me, when I was diagnosed I would find myself crying. But after a while I just found that I had lost the ability too cry. I felt myself wanting too or feeling like crying but couldn't find any tears.

Also I tend to hide emotions anyway in front of people, I dont know why maybe I'm just embarrassed.

It's a big problem with a lot of people I think.

I have Anxiety and Depression and am a 27 yr old male.

Hope you can find a way of crying soon
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  #17  
Old Sep 05, 2016, 01:53 PM
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For whatever reason, I don't really find an outlet in crying. Occasionally I'll drop a tear and the appropriate moment in A sad movie, but IRL I almost never shed a tear.

I'll have to blame it on my upbringing. We were brought up in an authoritarian household, and basically not allowed to cry. Even if we received a severe beating from the head of the house for some minor infraction, we were expected to stop crying, sit on the lap of the abuser, and listen to them tell us about how they loved us and it was done for our own good. We weren't allowed to get down until we had stopped crying and could put on a good face to rejoin the rest of the party. It didn't matter that we couldn't sit down for three days, that was forced when necessary as well.

To that I claim and process I call bu||*****. It's no way to raise a child, and when he passes away from old age I doubt there will be many (if any) tears shed by me. Such is life.
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  #18  
Old Sep 05, 2016, 02:01 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Eamgr View Post
It happened to me, when I was diagnosed I would find myself crying. But after a while I just found that I had lost the ability too cry. I felt myself wanting too or feeling like crying but couldn't find any tears.

Also I tend to hide emotions anyway in front of people, I dont know why maybe I'm just embarrassed.

It's a big problem with a lot of people I think.

I have Anxiety and Depression and am a 27 yr old male.

Hope you can find a way of crying soon
It's not that I want to cry. I guess I've just always been under the impression that to be considered depressed you had to be someone who cries all the time.
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Dx: BP2 and MDD

Current meds: 100mg Wellbutrin; 200mg Lamictal; 400mg Seroquel at night; Xanax 1mg/PRN; 100mg/PRN Trazodone at night for insomnia
Diagnosed in May 2016


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  #19  
Old Sep 05, 2016, 08:27 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JustJace2u View Post
It's not that I want to cry. I guess I've just always been under the impression that to be considered depressed you had to be someone who cries all the time.


I don't think part of th diagnostic criteria for depression is crying.
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  #20  
Old Sep 05, 2016, 08:34 PM
Jenny R Jenny R is offline
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I cried a lot before I sought treatment for my depression. I rarely or never cry now that I am on SSRi. I want to cry, sometimes I want to show my emotions or just get it out of my system but I can't. I have almost cried in therapy once or twice and it was kind a big deal because I never cry.
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  #21  
Old Sep 07, 2016, 05:17 PM
Eamgr Eamgr is offline
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Originally Posted by JustJace2u View Post
It's not that I want to cry. I guess I've just always been under the impression that to be considered depressed you had to be someone who cries all the time.
That's not true, with some people it is, with others it's different.

There is no set pattern with depression some people cry lots others don't. I went through a spell well anger was a problem. Now I'm going through a paranoid and sleeping problem.

You don't have to cry to be depressed. I think the most common symptoms are fake smiles in front of people and feeling low, depressed and bad in private. Most people wouldn't know you were depressed unless you told them.

Many people I know don't realise or know that I am they just see the happy, caring fun person that I am in front of people. When I'm alone it's different.

If anyone says your not depressed as you don't cry then they are wrong and I think many others with depression and other mental illness would have similar experiences.

Hope this helps you.
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  #22  
Old Sep 08, 2016, 04:40 PM
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I was told by a therapist after my husband died to cry it out. That it would heal me. I couldn't believe a human could cry so many tears. Grief has to be expressed through tears.....otherwise, it may hurt us physically, sometimes in drastic ways. So cry.
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  #23  
Old Sep 08, 2016, 07:14 PM
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ScientiaOmnisEst ScientiaOmnisEst is offline
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Originally Posted by Jenny R View Post
I cried a lot before I sought treatment for my depression. I rarely or never cry now that I am on SSRi. I want to cry, sometimes I want to show my emotions or just get it out of my system but I can't.
Maybe it's an SSRI side effect, because the same thing happened to me.
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  #24  
Old Sep 08, 2016, 08:10 PM
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Well, I had a good cry in my therapists office today. Damn her for making it happen...LOL!!!
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Dx: BP2 and MDD

Current meds: 100mg Wellbutrin; 200mg Lamictal; 400mg Seroquel at night; Xanax 1mg/PRN; 100mg/PRN Trazodone at night for insomnia
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  #25  
Old Sep 08, 2016, 08:34 PM
mindwrench mindwrench is offline
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I rarely cry. I know it is because I am so withdrawn and detached. I have cried maybe 4 times in the last 10 years, but usually more than the current event justifies.
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