[gayleggg]

I finally admitted today that I'm suicidal. I've been suppressing it but I admitted it this morning to MHMR and then to my husband in the midst of an argument.

It couldn't come at a worse time financially. I'm in the middle of switching to Medicare and having trouble getting my meds covered at a price that I can pay.

I'm just really tired of the fight.

[Skeezyks]

Hello gayleggg: I'm sorry you are struggling. But I celebrate the fact that you have let your struggle be known even if it did occur partly in the midst of an argument with your husband. I just keep everything to myself. So I know what that feels like. I'm on Medicare but I'm not on med's of any variety. So I don't know what kinds of costs I'd be facing if I were. I know how difficult it can be to keep going though. So I send hugs with the hope you will be able to find deep peace within...

[JustJace2u]

Sending tons of hugs your way

[Flutterby11]

i am sorry you are feeling bad keep posting if you need to and i hope things starts to get better soon for you and you can get your meds sorted.

[DechanDawa]

I am proud of you that you let it out. I started admitting I had suicidal ideation about a month ago. Something I did that was helpful is I started calling crisis hotlines. I called several different hotlines. I felt I could talk openly to the people on these hotlines. One crisis center even called me back every few days to see how I was doing. It really helped to start expressing myself openly. It is what it is. The people on the hotlines helped me ascertain where I was on the scale. Maybe this could be a next step for you. You know....do you just have thoughts, or is it more severe and urgent? I also started to look for mental health care, as you know. It isn't going that well but just the act of trying to find help makes me feel better. I started a new job while in the midst of having a lot of suicidal ideation. However, I have noted that often I am now less suicidal and more just depressed. So just as it is written all over the internet...this state you are in is not permanent...however, it is your whole being crying out for help and you must, must, must listen to it. I know you also have a daughter. Have you confided in her? How is your husband with this new development? This is your inner soul crying out for help. I am sorry you are having trouble with Medicare. Just keep talking. I hope you will post here again soon. You have helped so many people here. Now it is your time to receive help. Blessings and best wishes, dear friend. So whatever brings momentary relief. Cuddle with your fur babies! PS I also go to bed much earlier and get more sleep because I have to get up early. Try not to day sleep. That's all. Take care of your physical self during this urgent time in your life.

[MommaD]

Sending healing thoughts your way Gayleggg. It's so hard to admit to SI but you did it. I hope your family is understanding and supportive.
Your friends are with you

[DechanDawa]

(((((((((((((((((((((gayleggg))))))))))))))))))))))

[Fuzzybear]

[Fuzzybear]

[*Laurie*]

Hi gayleggg, Good for you for putting your SI out there and asking for support! That's a big thing. As you probably know, you are not alone. We are here for you