[Littleshoe]

My boyfriend has a hard time staying motivated sometimes and when things start to go wrong he shuts down and I have no idea how to help him. I try to be the kind loving supportive girlfriend he needs but it never works. I tell him that I understand why he feels like that and I try to remind him that things aren't going to always not work out. I try to help distract him by offering quality time and reminding him we are allowed to take a break and not feel like this but that we don't have to forget the things we need to do. I try to tell him that by being able to keep himself in a good mood and to still be able to say like a mature adult that when the time comes to do these things I will. And it never works.. he just shuts off. It makes me feel like **** because I can't even offer him quality time to help him feel better without getting shut down, because it's not productive. He comes at with me with an attitude saying things like well what can we do now to make things better. And honestly right now we're in a bit of a tough situation. We have a kid on the way, were both 21, but he's lost his job and can't get out of a funk. And he keeps telling me he's just gotten used to the fact that I can't help him when he feels like this. I have no idea what to do because I should be able to help him but I'm just lacking in that field and apparently offering nice quality time isn't good enough
What am I supposed to do...

[Rohag]

Hello & Welcome, Littleshoe!

In another post you mention your boyfriend is bipolar and not taking medication. The folks in the Bipolar Forum may be best equipped to answer your questions. You may also find support in Partners of People & Caregivers.

Mood disorders can be devilishly hard on the sufferer and their loved ones. Though it is your natural inclination to attempt to help, you - and your boyfriend - are fighting against forces in the brain that are interfering with processing emotions. Bipolar Depression is not going be "reasonable," neither with you nor your boyfriend.

Turning here for help is good. Learn as much as you can. Make yourself at home.

[Fizzyo]

Sorry it's so hard. Sometimes a depressed person doesn't want to hear that someone understands how they feel, even if they do. No one knows what it feels like to be in someone else's head. It sounds as if you're doing everything you can. I hope he is accepting professional help.
It's important you look after yourself too. Take time out away from him and pamper yourself or do something you enjoy. It's no good you burning out too.

[Fuzzybear]