[MickeyCheeky]

I feel like a burden for all the people around me (both financially and emotionally).. because of me, my parents have to spend a lot of money (for therapy, meds, ecc.) and it makes me feel guilty. And I get the feeling they're not happy about this. And it's all my fault because I am the one who's feeling this way.. Same thing could apply for my friends here at PC.

I try my best to be helpful and supportive, but I feel like that's just not enough and that I'm useless most of the time..

Tell me if I a wrong but don't many Italian mothers handle most of the chores inside the house (especially cooking--aren't most great cooks)? I am guilty of being like this too. When my children would offer to help, sometimes I would say, "That's alright, I got this." Ironically, I wanted them to have plenty of time to study and they were enrolled in the college prep type courses yet my son is now working in the construction industry. I think your main job right now is to find a job, apprenticeship or go back to school in order to find a way to make a living some day. In the meantime, make sure you are exercising at least 40 minutes a day.

[MickeyCheeky]

Yes, my mother does most of her daily duties alone.. and she mostly refuses any help But sometimes I'm able to convince her..

I'll try my best to study and go to university.. although I'm afraid to be a disappointment for everyone if I fail.

Thank you for replying

Originally Posted by MickeyCheeky

Yes, my mother does most of her daily duties alone.. and she mostly refuses any help But sometimes I'm able to convince her..

When my son lived at home, it was exactly the same for him.

You may do just fine. When I went to a 4 year university, my grades were better during the last 3 years then they were during the first year. Remember, there could be challenges in a few of your classes though, hopefully, not all of them. That is why the most commonly asked question about your record at the end is what was your grade point AVERAGE......

[MickeyCheeky]

Hope you're right.. thank you.

[Teddy Bear]

I think I am a burden to my family. Sometimes there's nothing you can do about. Sorry you feel that way

[Frankbtl]

Hi Mickey

Firstly, I've got to say it is not your fault you're feeling this way
Feeling depression can be out of anyone's control, sure sometimes it can be possible to manage it, and possible to work through it........but we/you know that you've done so much in trying those things...........and hoping with you that it does get better........and better.......for you..........but we/you know that just deciding you're not going to be depressed isn't going to just suddenly make everything alright, yes??!!

And your parents...........depression itself can tell you all sorts of things, like you're worthless, you're useless, you're not worthy of......, you don't deserve.......which aren't true (!!)..........so it's natural, to a point, that you're going to be thinking other people are going to be thinking those things about you too............but the "real" world Mickey.........very often people aren't thinking those things at all .........and often enough the complete opposite of those things

To me.........I'd say that your parents could be very proud of you..........you have stuck with your education and come so far in it...........on here, you always come across as really supportive, kind, empathetic, sensitive, caring.........I don't know how much you're able to show that at home, but I'd say that regardless, it would be really, really, really hard for your parents not to see some of those qualities in you (however much you think they're not showing!!)...........and really, really, really hard for them not to be proud of those qualities, and of you

Alison

[MickeyCheeky]

Thank you, Alison I sure hope they aren't thinking negatively about me.. although sometimes I feel like I deserve it. :/

[Frankbtl]

Originally Posted by MickeyCheeky

Thank you, Alison I sure hope they aren't thinking negatively about me.. although sometimes I feel like I deserve it. :/

I know that sometimes there's no stopping thoughts like that coming.......depression can lie to you in the cruelest ways........but just remind yourself that a "simple" thought doesn't make something real, hey??
And you know, I'd say that it's possible that the act of them paying for meds and therapy says the exact reverse of what you're feeling they think........maybe with that they are thinking positively about you.........that you're worth everything it may take, to them, that they do see you as special, that it is an act of love, because they love you and are thinking anything but negatively about you/about who you are

Alison

[MtnTime2896]

I can't speak for anyone else but just know that whenever I get a message from you I smile. I smile because you're one of my first friends on here and I've seen you grow. I also see how much you genuinely care. You're a great person, Mickey. You can't help that you have this illness. You can only help how you deal with it. Take care, fren.

[Sunflower123]

I agree with Frankbtl. You are not a burden. You are much loved but your depression is lying to you. I know you're not crazy about your therapist but could you work through this with them? It's hard and painful to feel like a burden. You are not alone in that. I hope you start feeling better soon. Sending big hugs.

[unicorn girl]

I know that feeling too. Sometimes I feel like I am the freak of the family. My sister is relatively normal and my parents don't seem to have a problem with her. They think that I need to stop doing some things that aren't actually hurting anyone. My dad told me that I'm too childish and that I should act normal.

[depressedalaskan]

Originally Posted by Frankbtl

Hi Mickey

Firstly, I've got to say it is not your fault you're feeling this way
Feeling depression can be out of anyone's control, sure sometimes it can be possible to manage it, and possible to work through it........but we/you know that you've done so much in trying those things...........and hoping with you that it does get better........and better.......for you..........but we/you know that just deciding you're not going to be depressed isn't going to just suddenly make everything alright, yes??!!

And your parents...........depression itself can tell you all sorts of things, like you're worthless, you're useless, you're not worthy of......, you don't deserve.......which aren't true (!!)..........so it's natural, to a point, that you're going to be thinking other people are going to be thinking those things about you too............but the "real" world Mickey.........very often people aren't thinking those things at all .........and often enough the complete opposite of those things

To me.........I'd say that your parents could be very proud of you..........you have stuck with your education and come so far in it...........on here, you always come across as really supportive, kind, empathetic, sensitive, caring.........I don't know how much you're able to show that at home, but I'd say that regardless, it would be really, really, really hard for your parents not to see some of those qualities in you (however much you think they're not showing!!)...........and really, really, really hard for them not to be proud of those qualities, and of you

Alison

This is so true with depression.

[depressedalaskan]

Hello Mickey, I was going to say the same thing as Frankbtl. Remember that depression is an illness that wants to take you off this earth. Depression will make you feel as badly as it can to make you sick of living. When you are feeling like you are keep fighting it off. When depression gets really bad; come here and post. Call your therapist (anytime day or night). Get one of your parents to take you to the hospital. I know how hard this can be but your friends and family do care for you very much. They may not understand depression but they understand their love for you.

[MickeyCheeky]

Thank you all for the support It's nice to see that you guys are always here for me.

[BrownHat22]

Originally Posted by MickeyCheeky

I feel like a burden for all the people around me (both financially and emotionally).. because of me, my parents have to spend a lot of money (for therapy, meds, ecc.) and it makes me feel guilty. And I get the feeling they're not happy about this. And it's all my fault because I am the one who's feeling this way.. Same thing could apply for my friends here at PC.

I try my best to be helpful and supportive, but I feel like that's just not enough and that I'm useless most of the time..

Mickey, you are not a burden. Even though I've only seen a few of your posts, I know that you aren't because I have felt the same exact way. Depression twists your mind. It makes us think that the interactions we have are negative or awful, when in fact they are either positive or normal. It took me a long time to realize that though, because I felt like I had all the evidence to prove I was a weight on those around me. You're not a burden Mickey.

Stay safe, and if you need to PM me, I'll always be able to listen.

[Fuzzybear]

You're not a burden I agree with BrownHat Please stay safe

[Crypts_Of_The_Mind]

Originally Posted by MickeyCheeky

I feel like a burden for all the people around me (both financially and emotionally).. because of me, my parents have to spend a lot of money (for therapy, meds, ecc.) and it makes me feel guilty. And I get the feeling they're not happy about this. And it's all my fault because I am the one who's feeling this way.. Same thing could apply for my friends here at PC.

I try my best to be helpful and supportive, but I feel like that's just not enough and that I'm useless most of the time..

Seems to me you help a lot of people. That's far from being a burden.

As far as your parents ... it's their job to support you until you reach adulthood. They made a conscious choice to bring you into this world. The only burden they can claim at this point, comes from them, not you. Part of being a parent is looking after your child's medical needs - physical and emotional. If you need medication, they need to supply it. It's not like medication is a luxury. If you need therapy, they need to see you get it. It isn't as if you are somehow thinking "oh boy! wouldn't that be so fun! Mom, Dad, give me money! I wanna go!" This is something you NEED. You aren't being a burden. You are being a living, breathing, child with a unique set of needs and problems and talents and joys. Each child and person is unique. It doesn't make you a burden to have a need.

Come up with any goals lately? If you have, join Seesaw's thread:
https://forums.psychcentral.com/depr...ntability.html