[littlemiss]

thought i'd join as im suffering my 2nd bout of depression and it dont help that none of my friends can be very supportive coz they dont understand. My bf of 4 yrs split up with me because he cudnt handle it. How long is it gonna last 4??? I hate the feeling of anxiety, no being able 2 sleep, the tears, reckless behaviour...the list goes on. Ive changed in2 such a horrible person and just want the old me back. If it goes on much longer I aint gonna have any friends left coz all im doin is pushing ppl away. I dont want to push them away its just happening...moan over

[msft1230]

noone ever seems to understand the nature of our depression and often times want to hide their selfs away because they too are depressed and are afraid to reach out and get help from others.I wish you all the luck there is always a brighter side.

[littlemiss]

I no theres a brighter side coz I got thru it b4 but this times somethings different. Im either really annoyingly high or really low. When im high im loud, rude, abrupt, aggressive at times, show no care 4 others feelings. I didnt have that last time. I was just always low. Its crap goin 2 bed at nite not knowing wat sort of mood im gona be wakin up in. Im so scared of losing sight of the old me. I'm only 21 - i dont want this 2 be how i remember the so called best years of my life

[nowheretorun]

i can hear your fears and concern. it shows you are paying attention to your life and who is better suited to do so? many slip and fall and never even realize it's happened.

because you are young it may help to recognize that a lifetime reflects something similar to a pendulum, first swinging so far this way, then the other and somewhere in the middle is where you may find yourself 40 or 50 years down the road.

experiencing "the ugly" now you will have an idea of what your extremes are and those experiences may become "markers" you will use to guide and steer your future days.

if it is brighter sunshine you desire then as Martin Luther King said (at least i think it was him) "Keep your eyes on the prize" and it will guide you towards the destination you seek. The road is not always smooth though... if able, whenever able, surround yourself with objects, people, and environments which most closely match what you seek... think about some therapy too ... you can never have too much help at any age...

[littlemiss]

my doctor is crap - ive seen him once bout all this and he gave me anti depressants. its like he jus dont wana know

[nowheretorun]

i hear ya... sad but sometimes in every profession and even non-professions, it is human nature to do what is easiest. i don't wanna remark on someone or something i know little about though... maybe his experience has shown that meds are what will get thru this tough time and before long you'll re-connect with the "old" you...

you are in the drivers seat though. can you get a second opinion? really, i believe that often all we need is a friend we can lean on and few are willing to be that person. as someone said above, it would require them to look within at their own selves, thoughts and feelings.

sometimes it seems as a society we have learned too well and it is too easy to simply turn-off and tune out that which makes us a bit uncomfortable but digging in and looking there can reveal gold and diamonds if a person perseveres...

i am certain you will find unlimited support and care from those others here who've also experienced what you are going thru...

it is hard to find at times but some out there still believe in human connection and caring... keep your faith unless like me you lose it a few times, always remember, when all else fails, it may be the only thing you'll have to hang onto...

[stefano]

If your doc is a general practitioner, you need consult a psychiatrist. Because antidepressants are not plain as antibiotics. You also need an accurate diagnosis.

[littlemiss]

Things are just getting worse. My doctor has done some blood tests so will have to wait and see wat they say. I've started scratching my arms and legs now but i cant help doin it. Does this make me a complete freak coz thats how i feel????

[nowheretorun]

i don't believe that any person is a freak.. what you are experiencing is the stuff of YOUR life.. important to all, but important most to yourself... these kind of symptoms deserve a professional diagnosis... remember to seek a second opinion if possible... love yourself all you can...

[Fuzzybear]

(((((((((((((( hugs )))))))))))))))

[bipolar_bear]

((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((littlemiss)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) Please try and be safe.

BB