[Aemulus2058]

So, I just found out that my grandfather is being placed on hospice and isn't expected to last more than 10 days. This comes after losing my grandmother, cousin, and aunt all within 4 years of each other and now this. I just don't know how to go through this again, and it's horrible. I've been to too many funerals, and I don't want to do it again. I just want it to stop. I feel like I can't do this again, and I'm worried about the effect this death will have on my diagnosis. I just don't know what to do now.

[FallDuskTrain]

Originally Posted by Aemulus2058

So, I just found out that my grandfather is being placed on hospice and isn't expected to last more than 10 days. This comes after losing my grandmother, cousin, and aunt all within 4 years of each other and now this. I just don't know how to go through this again, and it's horrible. I've been to too many funerals, and I don't want to do it again. I just want it to stop. I feel like I can't do this again, and I'm worried about the effect this death will have on my diagnosis. I just don't know what to do now.

I am sorry. You must have a lot of anxiety and fear about what is about to come.
I have nothing wise to say as I don’t know the solution. The most challenging aspect of grief is that no one else understands nor seem to care. Unless one goes through a loss, he/she cannot know the pain. I lost my dad this year and it has been an extremely lonely voyage. All my family lives in a different continent and i have no close friends. The entire world has been keeping on expecting me to handle it and have my act together while I am trying to navigate this loss and the daily struggles of life without any emotional support or empathy (except my T).
We are here for you, at PC. You can message me whenever you want.
You are not alone, although you seem to have one loss after another which is a recipe to drain your energy. I am sorry. Try connecting with people who share the similar pain and with people who can show you empathy. You need understanding and kind hearted people during these times.

[CepheidVariable]

I'm so sorry. So much loss.

I've never been good at that sort of thing myself. I guess no one truly is, and that's why they have so little useful advice or support.

I'd say, be with people anyways. It will help much more than isolation. Check out the grief and loss forum if you haven't already.

Look after yourself.

If it's too much to handle and you feel you can't do all of it -- if you have to make a choice -- skip the funeral, but see your grandfather in the hospice. What we do and share with people in the here and now is so much more important than any afterthoughts.

I regret a lot of things in my life. But when my grandparents were ill at the end, I spent the time with them while they were still lucid. Not overly long visits, but every day. Things got ugly with relatives after that, but I know I did the best I could while they were alive and it made a difference. I have always been at peace with that since.

I hope some of this helps.