[douglas7979]

I ama 17 year old who has suffered depression for about 5 years, i have long periods of depression which peaked about 3 years ago. I feel depressed, energyless, like theres no point to anything etc for 2monthsish then maybe up to 2 weeks(rare usually about 5 or 6 days) of being me, confidant, energised happy. Then back to depression, ive recently gone into upper sixsth form and am in the "popular" people group, i am a clever person but ruin myself by simply refusing to do schooolwork (i have no idea why), i have a stable family mother and father married 23 years and have never had to deal with death in my family. so why have i had this?
The first thing people realise about me is that i look depressed and miserable, about 6 people mentioned it who i had never met before within 2 days of entering sixsth form, as did the keeper where i go beating, and i have been told numersous times i look unnaproachable. I am unpredictable and get angered at the slightest nuisance. But my family are used to it. I cant tell them about it, nobody knoows anything about it but me and it is grinding inside me, i have bottled anger which i am sick of harbouring.
the thing is that it has only been the last month or so the anger has really built up and the depression has got worse than usual, i am sick of it and want to see a psychiatrist butcant tell my parents, what the hell should i do and how can i help myself?
any answers are welcome and thatnks for it.

[dragonphoto]

Douglas everything you described sounds just like about three weeks ago. It ended up with me being put in the hospital for three days. I started meds and Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (You feel what you think) Great program for me I was able to break down why I felt the way I did. I am still separated from my wife but I feel so much better. I feel awake again like I did so many years ago. Nothing really bothers me. All I can tell you is DO NOT be afraid to ask for help. There is no shame or guilt in the way you feel you just need someone's help.

Peace
Chad

[LonelyLady]

Douglas, I've very new here, but I can't help but reply. I was wondering if there was a counclor, a teacher, or parents of a friend that you would be comfortable talking with. I've suffered with depression my whole life and I'm 62 now. Please don't let it go on without help!

[smiley1984]

does your school have a counsellor? that would be the best place to start in finding what might be available in your area.
Counsellors are required to keep things confidential unless of course you or someone else is at risk of harm.
You don't need to have a reason to become depressed - it is a biochemical problem that can really be helped with anti-depressants but being at school can be very stressful.
Many local doctors (GPs, PCPs depending which country you're in) are also happy to manage depression in the beginning and starting meds and if that helps you might not need to see a psychiatrist.
I totally understand not wanting to tell your parents - i'm the same.
Are you able to go to your local dr without your parents? i'm not sure how it works in your country but if they need to know because of insurance or payments you could just tell them you want to go for headaches or some other thing. You've had this for long enough and there is no need to suffer as their are effective treatments.

Good Luck

I'm not sure I have the answer for you, but I'd like to share that I had a similar experience.

I wasn't officially diagnosed with a mental illness until I was 22. I had problems as a teenager and into college but felt I was unable to get treatment. I haven't had the best family relationships, and I was not willing to share my challenges with my parents. For years, I was just counting the days until I was off of their health plan because I knew one of the first things I was going to do was get some help. I made it thu, barely. I had a lot of social difficulties in high school and academic difficulties in college. With treatment, things may have been easier.

I sought treatment as soon as I was off their health plan just as I planned to do. I am happy to say I am doing very well.