[LittleMouse]

I'm so scared for myself. I've dropped back down into the "pit" again and just feel terrible. I'm so scared I will never find my way out of the dark hole I'm in. I am so depressed and discouraged and disappointed about life. I try so hard to battle this demon but it seems to be getting the best of me lately and I just don't know want to do. I don't know if I can take it anymore and I am so scared I'll never get myself back again.

[pachyderm]

Familiar thoughts. I don't really have any useful suggestions -- except maybe just to keep on trying. Maybe it will get better. Maybe this is part of the process.

[nowheretorun]

(((((((((littlemouse))))))))))) it's very dark in the hole... up here we have sunlight and grass...

i know about the demons ok enough myself... there cuter if i imagine them as dragons... then baby dragons...

those demons are a part of me... they've been growing with me my whole life... i've fed them and watered them... screamed at them fought with them... and they still haven't died... maybe they aren't meant to?

so now i give them love... it seems to tame them a bit... instead of feeding them with hurtful and hateful thoughts (junkfood) i try to give them compassionate food like hugs and holding them like a mother would a baby... they become very quiet and sedate...

i hope you feel better soon...

[Fuzzybear]

(((((((((((((( LittleMouse ))))))))))))))

[wickedwings]

((((littlemouse)))) i know exactly how you feel. i was there before.

[tigerlillie76]

I know what you mean LittleMouse. Don't know if I can offer much advise. Hope it helps to know you are not alone. I have been going through the same thing lately. It does help to know there are so many people here who can relate and give compassion and understanding. Just believe it will get better.

[Perna]

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
nowheretorun said:
(((((((((littlemouse))))))))))) it's very dark in the hole... up here we have sunlight and grass...

i know about the demons ok enough myself... there cuter if i imagine them as dragons... then baby dragons...

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

Love that idea, Nowhere!!!

((((((((littlemouse)))))))

if you look back at peoples posts, you will see this is part of depression. I was talking to poetrylover today. I said exactly the same, a couple of days ago I was on cloud 9 and was happier than I have been for ages. Today I feel despair, depressed, anxious and lethargic....Please know you will feel up and down and when you are so down it is scary. My demons jump up and bite too, nowheretorun has a good mind and his advice is excellent, I will take it myself.......

I hear you loud and clear, you are not alone and never will be, this illness just sucks, but you will overcome it, I believe I will be a little better each and every time I have had a bad episode......take care mousey and pm me anytime, your feelings are so similar to a lot of peoples here, we are all here to pull each other out of that pit.

Love and hugs, Jinnyann xxxxxx

[justpassingby]

Hi Little Mouse

Let's get through this pit of hell together if you want to. Just yesterday I went through the worst of the worst and I made it out of that pit. I asked for help from the people here who I will call my new friends, I stayed online for as long as it took to rid my demon calling out my name to hurt myself. I refused to listen and distracted myself with anything I could think of. I never before was able to do this alone, I would end up in the hospital like many times before. This time was different because I applied some of my coping skills that my T suggested and I hate to admit it but it worked at least for one day. Today I do feel much better and I know if you lean on each of us we will hold you up until you can stand alone. Don't let the fear of the darkness keep you in that pit. Crawl out if you can, just do it and we'll be right next to you.

[haunted]

Little Mouse I know how you feel. I've been in the "pit" for about 2 months now and this last week has been a pure hell. When it's this bad sometimes I just give into to it. I sleep alot, I let the house get real dirty and I withdraw for a few days from everthing and everybody. And I'm to the point that if the people around me don't like it, too bad. I used to feel guilty about how I was feeling made other people feel. I don't know if you do but I know other peole with depression feel guilt about almost everything. Please just take care of youself , cry if you have to, scream if you have to. {{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}