[MatBell]

I have these constant thoughts that I'm a complete failure. That I've never made a single right decision in my life. That I'm just wasting away and I'm never getting better. I'm 31 but feel like I have the security of an 18-year old.
No matter where I turn I'm reminded of my own inadequacies, why everyone is better off than me. I'm so sick of myself, I want to crawl out of my own skin. Do you know the feeling?

I was put on 300 mg Venlafaxin about 4-5 weeks ago. On one hand I can feel them kicking in these last few days - a certain lightness, less anxiety - but on the other hand I'm still feeling awful. They can't fix the state of my life or the loneliness that's always been there.

I just don't know what to do. I feel I'm in a cul-de-sac. I'm so suicidal.

I feel the same way with a facebook account. So I deleted it and I no longer compare myself to people I haven't seen in years.

Back to topic: call the lifeline asap and get your meds checked

[MatBell]

Originally Posted by 2ISAB

I feel the same way with a facebook account. So I deleted it and I no longer compare myself to people I haven't seen in years.

Back to topic: call the lifeline asap and get your meds checked

I don’t look at Facebook either. I wouldn’t be able to handle it at all.

[Thirty shades]

I know the feeling...

For me this feeling does pass, I hope it will lift for you too. Could you make a list during the ok times that you can read back of things you did achieve?

Try to be kind to yourself, small things, your inner child wants your attention maybe?

Best wishes to you

[MatBell]

I don’t know how to live like a person my age. I feel so miserable. I feel so alone.

[Candy1955]

So don't live like a person your age. Live like you want. Maybe a quirky, eccentric person. I once knew a young woman with a red telephone, two cats, Posha and Saturn, and she wore antique jewelry. She was cool. Make yourself into what you want you to be.

Originally Posted by MatBell

I have these constant thoughts that I'm a complete failure. That I've never made a single right decision in my life. That I'm just wasting away and I'm never getting better. I'm 31 but feel like I have the security of an 18-year old.
No matter where I turn I'm reminded of my own inadequacies, why everyone is better off than me. I'm so sick of myself, I want to crawl out of my own skin. Do you know the feeling?

I was put on 300 mg Venlafaxin about 4-5 weeks ago. On one hand I can feel them kicking in these last few days - a certain lightness, less anxiety - but on the other hand I'm still feeling awful. They can't fix the state of my life or the loneliness that's always been there.

I just don't know what to do. I feel I'm in a cul-de-sac. I'm so suicidal.

Venlafaxin is very effective in fighting depression. Maybe it will take a few more weeks to be completely effective and you'll feel less lonely and be more able to accept yourself with all your failures and successes. But please talk to your pdoc about your suicidal feeling. Some meds can get you more suicidal.

[MatBell]

I'm still not feeling good today. Don't know what's wrong. I'm feeling so suicidal and don't know what to do with myself.

Originally Posted by MatBell

I'm still not feeling good today. Don't know what's wrong. I'm feeling so suicidal and don't know what to do with myself.

Please talk to your pdoc. This may be serious.

[MatBell]

Originally Posted by Desiree2006

Please talk to your pdoc. This may be serious.

Have to wait til monday. Every moment is hard right now.

Originally Posted by MatBell

Have to wait til monday. Every moment is hard right now.

Stay strong. It's just a couple of days. Hugs to you.

I feel like a failure lots of times. According to others I am doing better than I think I am. Having depression can make me and others feel bad about themselves no matter how successful they are.

At work I know of some guys around my age whose lives seem perfect. They have great wives who do all kinds of nice things for them, wonderful successful kids, take exotic trips, do exciting things on the weekends, and other things. It all makes me feel like crap. My life is far from like that.

I make the mistake of comparing myself to other people. It seems like everyone else is doing better than me, except the bums. It never dawns on me that other people are hurting. As far as my social life goes, I have been a total flop. I know why, but I can't get my way out of it. So I guess I have to live with it. I'm doing OK in just about everything else except for the social life, which means a lot to me.

Originally Posted by will19

I feel like a failure lots of times. According to others I am doing better than I think I am. Having depression can make me and others feel bad about themselves no matter how successful they are.

At work I know of some guys around my age whose lives seem perfect. They have great wives who do all kinds of nice things for them, wonderful successful kids, take exotic trips, do exciting things on the weekends, and other things. It all makes me feel like crap. My life is far from like that.

I make the mistake of comparing myself to other people. It seems like everyone else is doing better than me, except the bums. It never dawns on me that other people are hurting. As far as my social life goes, I have been a total flop. I know why, but I can't get my way out of it. So I guess I have to live with it. I'm doing OK in just about everything else except for the social life, which means a lot to me.

Yeah you are not doing that bad, in fact you are coping well. Hugs. There are people much worse than you ... people like me, I can't work and doing housework and exercise seem like a chore and most of the days I avoid doing them.

Your social life will surely get better...don't lose hope. My best wishes.

Originally Posted by Desiree2006

Yeah you are not doing that bad, in fact you are coping well. Hugs. There are people much worse than you ... people like me, I can't work and doing housework and exercise seem like a chore and most of the days I avoid doing them.

Your social life will surely get better...don't lose hope. My best wishes.

Thank you for your kind words. I'm hoping that my social life gets better, but it seems like a "tall order" in asking for that. As I get older, it gets worse, even though people say that I look much younger than I am. And I certainly act much younger than my age. All I have is one friend and I feel like I'm lucky to have him. But he's over 80 and has a lot of physical limits. I feel like, in order for us to get together, I have to tote him around. Plus he can be very critical and makes me depressed.

Originally Posted by Candy1955

So don't live like a person your age. Live like you want. Maybe a quirky, eccentric person. I once knew a young woman with a red telephone, two cats, Posha and Saturn, and she wore antique jewelry. She was cool. Make yourself into what you want you to be.

I totally agree Candy. I am pretty quirky and weird and when I embrace it I am so much happier.

[Candy1955]

Me too! And I think if others just quit trying to be whatever the 'perfect' or 'appropriate' person they envision, and just be the person they are, some problems would be more manageable. I knew a guy who was so miserable, so lonely, and he just gave up on what he thought he was supposed to be. He took up cooking, was very good, entertained people and soon developed a close tight group of 'odd' friends just like him. They were very close and supportive of each other. It can work!

[lark265]

Originally Posted by MatBell

I don’t know how to live like a person my age. I feel so miserable. I feel so alone.

Many times I feel like I am face down in it....I don't know how to live like a person my age either. It would have been nice to have at least one loving parent to let me know that hey, it's going to be OK.......just once or twice

[MatBell]

I hope next week will be better. This weekend has been pretty horrible for me. Have to keep hoping I guess, even though I don’t have much faith.