[mountainstream]

I’ve been abandoned by all my family which I deserve. I have two friends. I’ve tried making other friends. After a while they stop talking to me. I read some literature on what are called personality disorders. The literature says people with some of these disorders are overly dependent on their friends and have little to offer and are failures. This only confirms what the abusers in my life told me. I don’t want to be here. I don’t want to be alive. I also have severe depression which is my fault too. Medication does not help. Therapy hasn’t helped. I don’t think it’s possible to transform this life which has been branded a failure, including by experts I paid for.

Possible trigger:

I wish I could do violence to myself to end this life.

[mote.of.soul]

Hi,

Yes, some of that literature and some of those so-called professionals are utter garbage, mountainstream. You don't have to accept their negative perspectives. Just the fact that they would say something like that shows me they're away with fairies in many respects.

Hang in there, please, mountainstream. Keep searching and keep trying, you'll be okay.

[MickeyCheeky]

I'm so sorry, mountainstream You don't deserve to be abandoned. Nobody does. I'm so sorry you're experiencing this. Just know that you're not a failure and none of this is your fault. You didn't ask for it. Please don't give up. I know things seem pretty bad right now, but trust me when I say that they can get better. Try to hang on. I believe in you. You can do this! You're strong, I know that. Stay safe and take care of yourself. Keep writing here if it helps. Feel free to PM me anytime. Let me know if I can do something to help you. Sending many hugs to you

[Rohag]

Hello, Mountainstream.

Originally Posted by mountainstream

I also have severe depression which is my fault too.

I accept your feeling the severe depression you experience is "your fault". Only if it is OK, could you explain a bit how you feel it is your fault? Are you saying that you feel responsible that your numerous efforts to "overcome" depression have not borne fruit?

Originally Posted by mote.of.soul

some of that literature and some of those so-called professionals are utter garbage

Agreed.

[mountainstream]

Thank you.... I’ve been put on someone’s Ignore list out of nowhere. I hardly post and I don’t know the person. I don’t blame anyone for ignoring me though. I don’t even blame those who abuse me. (Not anybody on pc). I’m profoundly unlikable. And completely useless. I’ve been told this by many people.

I was a mistake when I was born. Thank you to those kind souls here who tolerate me.

[mote.of.soul]

Originally Posted by mountainstream

Thank you.... I’ve been put on someone’s Ignore list out of nowhere. I hardly post and I don’t know the person. I don’t blame anyone for ignoring me though. I don’t even blame those who abuse me. (Not anybody on pc). I’m profoundly unlikable. And completely useless. I’ve been told this by many people.

I was a mistake when I was born. Thank you to those kind souls here who tolerate me.

Hi,

No, please don't think that mountainstream. You don't sound at all like someone who is unlikable and the fact that you're being treated this way by people, your family as well, is not right. They must be out of touch with reality, sorry. You're not a mistake, okay? Banish those thoughts from your mind please, and keep reaching out which I think will be good for you. A lot of people understand these thoughts & feelings you're describing. (((Hugs to you)))

[Fuzzybear]