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#1
Jan 04, 2008, 05:39 PM
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I know people who have known me for a long time will know I'm up and down a lot....
I feel really down and restless,,,,I know I should be trying to get out....hubby says he is taking me and the dog out for a long walk tomorrow lol..... I just feel I should be making more of an effort, but I just dont feel like it at all. I seem to be just existing....I HATE going out doors in the daylight, no I'm not a vampire, lol, just self conscious and paranoid..... I dont like being me.....I would like to be someone else..confident, intelligent, useful....i wish i had more courage, strength......please dont think this is attention seeking, I always think people think that of me....i have always been told that.....i am speaking from my heart....i feel so pathetic, so many people have worse problems than me I have to go.....i really just want to sleep and forget..... sorry i'm so boring..... kerry  
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#2
Jan 04, 2008, 05:43 PM
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Jin, i know exactly how you feel, and am about to make one of the most hypocritical comments ever,
but you should think more of yourself. There'll be a moment in your life when you look back and be glad everything happened as it did, because it'll create a stronger person when you get through it. That's what i've been told. as i said, hypocritical eh? take care, Kelly. xxx |
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#3
Jan 04, 2008, 05:48 PM
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No sorries Jin. You reflect so many things I have thought, said, believe.. but you said it's not true for me, and I think the same for you.
We are in a rough patch and need each other to lean on sometimes. It doesn't mean anyone is going to love you any less. I think we all see the good in others and want it for ourselves, but we cannot see that we are already there. Take care Jin, I hope we can both see a light soon. |
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#4
Jan 04, 2008, 05:55 PM
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(((((((anna))))))
(((((kelly))))) thankyou, I just feel like I should be making more effort I know...I just CANT grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr I should replace that with I CAN I CAN I CAN nope not working Jn x |
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#5
Jan 04, 2008, 06:17 PM
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Dear Kerry,
Since the age of 8, I can vividly remember looking outside the window watching other kids play outside. I wondered, "why am I so damn scared to go outside". About an hour ago, I had to go to the physical therapist and the same feelings that I had then, I still have today. In fact, every single thing that I do causes these same feelings over and over. I too, think I am some kind of vampire insomniac that has these uncontrollable anxiety attacks whether it is day or night. I can't believe I have functioned at any capacity for all these years. But, here is the kicker: No matter how painful and torturous it is for me, I still fight through it. Again, this is every single day. Now, I read that you mentioned that wish you were confident, intelligent, and useful. I want to encourage you to think about it this way. You know, I have not been here at Psych Central for all that long, but I have been here long enough to read and respond to other postings in the forum. More times than I can remember, I see you replying offering support in the form of hugs, kind words, and/or incredibly sharp and useful advice. Being the sort of stubborn person I am, I know that I am right. :-))))) I think that you should give yourself the credit you deserve. I know for a fact that your other friends here feel the same way. Well, I hope you rest well, and then tomorrow, get out and let other people get to see what a warm and smart person you are. Now, put on your Nike shoes and Just Do It! :-) Take care, David (NewDawnFades) |
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#6
Jan 04, 2008, 06:51 PM
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I am going out tomorrow...in my horse riding boOts lol ,,,,very Muddy sorry i have ahd a sleeping pill////cant see to type very well need to go tobed my eyes are shutting
thankyou for the advidr David hugs and care..... KERRY XXXX SPEAK TOMORROW LOVE TO YOU ALL |
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#7
Jan 04, 2008, 06:59 PM
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You're welcome. Rest well and have fun tomorrow!!!!
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#8
Jan 04, 2008, 10:39 PM
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((((((((((((((( jinny )))))))))))))))
 
__________________
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#9
Jan 04, 2008, 10:55 PM
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</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
just feel I should be making more of an effort, but I just dont feel like it at all. I seem to be just existing....I HATE going out doors in the daylight, no I'm not a vampire, lol, just self conscious and paranoid..... I dont like being me.....I would like to be someone else..confident, intelligent, useful....i wish i had more courage, strength......please dont think this is attention seeking, I always think people think that of me....i have always been told that.....i am speaking from my heart....i feel so pathetic, so many people have worse problems than me I have to go.....i really just want to sleep and forget..... sorry i'm so boring..... </div></font></blockquote><font class="post"> I can totally relate to your circumstances, jinnyann. I think the only difference between our situation is that you have a husband and a dog! I don't hold up much hope for me, but I sure hope things begin to look up for you soon. Take care 
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"Lord, we know what we are, yet know not what we may be." Hamlet, Act 4, sc v Wm. Shakespeare |
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#10
Jan 04, 2008, 11:05 PM
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Jin, you are so many things but boring? HA! Not even close. You are confident enough to reach out to so many here, you're intelligent enough to see ways to help others, and what could be more useful than that?
I hope you feel better tomorrow. Be safe. Cyran0
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My blog: http://cyran0.psychcentral.net/ Dx: Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Major Depressive Disorder, PTSD (childhood physical/sexual abuse), history of drug abuse. Meds: Zoloft, Lorazapam, Coffee, Cigarettes "I may climb perhaps to no great heights, but I will climb alone." -Cyrano de Bergerac |
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#11
Jan 05, 2008, 01:38 AM
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((((((((((altered)))))))))))
there is hope for every one of us wretched beings!!! yes, including me and you and you and you (points to everyone here and the world over)!!!! i am sorry...what you said effected me and I dunno why. I have been emotional wreck tho so excuse me if I am sappy!! Melanie
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"The night racks my bones, and the pain that gnaws me knows no rest," laments Job (The Holy Bible: New Revised Standard Version, Job 30:17). |
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#12
Jan 07, 2008, 02:50 AM
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(((((jin))))
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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