[Deilla]

Today I'm having a difficult time. My inner critic is beating me up. I'm trying to stop it but I feel like a bad person. Part of me believes that if the inner critic destroys me enough, I'll behave properly and bad things will stop happening. I experienced a set back recently. It's been stressing me out. So much so I want to cry. But it's my fault. I'm a bad person. I believe bad people attract bad things. I don't know how to stop being bad. My inner critic isn't helping.

[Yzen]

We change all the time and feeling like a bad person is only a passing thought. It is your critic making an unfair judgement. It isn't a truth. You are not a bad person. You are a worthwhile, wonderful person that is constantly changing. Some days may feel difficult; other days feel more positive. Your inner critic is trying to convince you it is all bad. Don't believe it.

[Deilla]

Originally Posted by Yzen

We change all the time and feeling like a bad person is only a passing thought. It is your critic making an unfair judgement. It isn't a truth. You are not a bad person. You are a worthwhile, wonderful person that is constantly changing. Some days may feel difficult; other days feel more positive. Your inner critic is trying to convince you it is all bad. Don't believe it.

Thank you for your kind words. I did some inner work last night. It seemed to help. The voice of my inner critic is mainly the voice of my mother. I tried to tell myself not to believe it. I'm an adult now. I get to think how I want to think!

[wiretwister]

when I got married we moved 4 hours away from my mother and basically cut off all contact . . . . it was the only way my new marriage would have ever survived , I am pretty sure she was bipolar and just a wee bit crazy . . . now I am dxed bipolar 1 so I feel qualified to say these things about her . . . that was my way to peace , I pray you find yours . .

[Deilla]

Originally Posted by wiretwister

when I got married we moved 4 hours away from my mother and basically cut off all contact . . . . it was the only way my new marriage would have ever survived , I am pretty sure she was bipolar and just a wee bit crazy . . . now I am dxed bipolar 1 so I feel qualified to say these things about her . . . that was my way to peace , I pray you find yours . .

Thank you! I tried to set a boundary with my mom about a month ago. She got upset and cut all ties with me. I try to console myself by saying it's really for the best.

[Breaking Dawn]

Dear Deilla, Hug, hug, hug! You are so obviously a good person! Your mother planted a recording in you long ago, probably when you were little. It's very hard to remove it, if it's even possible. And she's still doing a number on you, as the expression goes. Maybe you could brush up on some of the CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) positive comebacks to those inner critic statements. I realize, though, that sometimes we just have bad days & nothing seems to work. I'm wishing you happier feelings, dear friend! Hugs & love to you!!

[Deilla]

Originally Posted by Breaking Dawn

Dear Deilla, Hug, hug, hug! You are so obviously a good person! Your mother planted a recording in you long ago, probably when you were little. It's very hard to remove it, if it's even possible. And she's still doing a number on you, as the expression goes. Maybe you could brush up on some of the CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) positive comebacks to those inner critic statements. I realize, though, that sometimes we just have bad days & nothing seems to work. I'm wishing you happier feelings, dear friend! Hugs & love to you!!

Thank you so much! Yes, some CBT will be helpful. I'm also reading a book about how to have more positive self talk. And I have audiobooks with positive affirmations that I can listen to. I think all of that helps fight the inner critic. I really hate when I have down days like that. Hope you are well!

[Breaking Dawn]

Very good, @Deilla! All of that is so good to hear. Good luck with everything!