Low self esteem

Feeling really down about myself, and having negative thoughts. I put on a lot of weight, and I’ve been trying to lose weight but I’m an emotional eater and so lately I haven’t gained, but haven’t lost and I as am almost 70 lbs overweight. I last myself in the mirror at my friends house, and saw really how much I’ve gained. Then I’m really thinking negative like why would anyone want you? Look at you, your fat. I don’t have a boyfriend-don’t want one right now because emotionally I can’t handle it right now. I have friends male and Female...even with my close male friend I think why does he even want to hang with me? We’re just friends but he is playful and flirts...but I think nothing of it. My thoughts go to, hes a good looking guy with a nice body, why would he want you?

Yes, in my opinion, you're right in thinking that the low self esteem is influencing your thoughts, very much so. And so that's obviously an area that you can address further still. I have very similar thoughts a lot, very self doubting thoughts, but these days I seem to be getting better at just letting them go and and just saying to myself 'bleh, I'm going to focus on the reality in front of me, not these echoes in the mind'.

Just wanted you to know also that, although I respect your wish to want to be a different weight, a lot of men, women, whomever, still see the beauty and attractiveness in a woman's form regardless. It's just a well known fact, that's all.

Also, friends are friends and just try to appreciate the fact that your friend, for example, is happy with your company. That's all. So that's some of my unsolicited advice there.

Thank you.

To be honest, I need to lose some weight too, though. My gut has now developed a definite 'overhang'. 🤣

I have put on a little weight these past couple of months and it’s very frustrating. I also battle low self esteem and I know it’s very painful.

I agree with mote. Your self esteem is one issue and your concerns about your health or physical appearance shouldn’t cause you to beat yourself up. Many people find you beautiful for who you are.