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  #151  
Old Jun 22, 2020, 10:03 AM
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Fuzzybear Fuzzybear is offline
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Originally Posted by little turtle View Post
maybe you can do something about the trauma and hurt...
i don't think you can change what actually happened to you...
but you can now choose to attack yourself or hug yourself when the hurt is there...
and you can blame others but that may not work as well as attending to the

little kid that was hurt so badly and couldn't defend
Good post little turtle.

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  #152  
Old Jun 22, 2020, 10:12 AM
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Thank you Little Turtle for your kind wisdom.

It feels like the attacks come from others who don't understand us.

The fallout left over from the past
Unfortunately all the hugs in the world don't change today and tomorrows problems
The hugs will help me through though.

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  #153  
Old Jun 22, 2020, 11:47 AM
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My cub has quietly stood up for herself. It has made her feel a bit better.
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  #154  
Old Jun 22, 2020, 12:19 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by little turtle View Post
maybe you can do something about the trauma and hurt...
i don't think you can change what actually happened to you...
but you can now choose to attack yourself or hug yourself when the hurt is there...
and you can blame others but that may not work as well as attending to the

little kid that was hurt so badly and couldn't defend
I think everyone is right here. It is possible to chip away on it, but as Fuzzy says, it's kind of like pushing that boulder up the steep hill in the middle of the night.

I am trying to learn to stop and pay attention when I am in pain, and as turtle says, try to embrace myself instead of fighting with it, saying I shouldn't feel that way, etc. Thicht Nhat Hahn (sp) talks about this, that when you are aware of discomfort, irritation, depression, or whatever, that you not fight against it, that you embrace it as if it were, in his words, a "tender little baby", and tell it you're here for it, because all of that, good and bad, are parts of the entity that is your self.

What I have the most trouble with is just stopping and holding still with myself and trying to do the comforting, when the rest of myself is saying, "What the f--- are you doing just sitting there when there are umpteen tasks to be accomplished??? Lazy, worthless, slob, " etc. etc. I have trouble convincing myself that how I feel at that time is more important than anything I might accomplish.

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  #155  
Old Jun 22, 2020, 02:30 PM
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Originally Posted by Thirty shades View Post
My cub has quietly stood up for herself. It has made her feel a bit better.
that makes me want to stand up for me
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  #156  
Old Jun 22, 2020, 02:35 PM
little turtle little turtle is offline
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I think everyone is right here. It is possible to chip away on it, but as Fuzzy says, it's kind of like pushing that boulder up the steep hill in the middle of the night.

I am trying to learn to stop and pay attention when I am in pain, and as turtle says, try to embrace myself instead of fighting with it, saying I shouldn't feel that way, etc. Thicht Nhat Hahn (sp) talks about this, that when you are aware of discomfort, irritation, depression, or whatever, that you not fight against it, that you embrace it as if it were, in his words, a "tender little baby", and tell it you're here for it, because all of that, good and bad, are parts of the entity that is your self.

What I have the most trouble with is just stopping and holding still with myself and trying to do the comforting, when the rest of myself is saying, "What the f--- are you doing just sitting there when there are umpteen tasks to be accomplished??? Lazy, worthless, slob, " etc. etc. I have trouble convincing
myself that how I feel at that time is more important than anything I might accomplish.

wow this is heavy...how do we know if these guys are right...the hahn guy and the zinn guy...what do they know that we don't...does this work ...i hope so...otherwise i have been wasting time....but fathers day i was practicing mindfulness....and when i got in my car i just started screaming and crying because of how i treated my own children...so when i talked to each kid it was really good...it turned out to be one of my best fathers day...and i didn't end up blaming somebody else...for who they are...
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  #157  
Old Jun 22, 2020, 03:04 PM
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Originally Posted by little turtle View Post
wow this is heavy...how do we know if these guys are right...the hahn guy and the zinn guy...what do they know that we don't...does this work ...i hope so...otherwise i have been wasting time....but fathers day i was practicing mindfulness....and when i got in my car i just started screaming and crying because of how i treated my own children...so when i talked to each kid it was really good...it turned out to be one of my best fathers day...and i didn't end up blaming somebody else...for who they are...
That's great, turtle, really great! So you talked to your kids? Had a conversation, sounds like. If both sides are willing, and only then, great things can be accomplished. I'm so happy for you.

By the way, who is zinn? Curious...
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  #158  
Old Jun 22, 2020, 03:19 PM
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That's great, turtle, really great! So you talked to your kids? Had a conversation, sounds like. If both sides are willing, and only then, great things can be accomplished. I'm so happy for you.

By the way, who is zinn? Curious...
jon kabat-zinn

yes it was very positive...all 4 kids
i didn't pay much attention to them when they were young..
i was busy with my work...i told them yesterday that was reality...
but that i love them and they are good kids
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  #159  
Old Jun 22, 2020, 03:40 PM
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(((((((((((((( little turtle ))))))))))))
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  #160  
Old Jun 22, 2020, 04:41 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by little turtle View Post
that makes me want to stand up for me
Go for it LT.

It feels good to speak the truth rather than stay quiet and be taken advantage of.
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  #161  
Old Jun 23, 2020, 06:41 AM
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Go for it LT.

It feels good to speak the truth rather than stay quiet and be taken advantage of.
GREAT POST dear Thirty shades

Indeed it feels good to speak the TRUTH

Much love to all on the bus.
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  #162  
Old Jun 23, 2020, 06:47 AM
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laying on my old couch with a cup of coffee...yes
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  #163  
Old Jun 23, 2020, 07:02 AM
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laying on my old couch with a cup of coffee...yes
I’m having some coffee right now
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  #164  
Old Jun 23, 2020, 12:55 PM
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mindfulness meditation today...it was wild...
before doing it i was feeling anxious...well i started breathing real fast
and crying without tears....after 10 minutes i felt better...
i really don't know what i am doing with this meditation
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  #165  
Old Jun 24, 2020, 04:24 PM
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LOVE to all on the bus
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  #166  
Old Jun 25, 2020, 03:07 AM
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Love, respect and hugs to all on the bus
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  #167  
Old Jun 25, 2020, 07:11 AM
MimiBhaduri0 MimiBhaduri0 is offline
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Love, respect and hugs to little turtle, fuzzy, thirty shades, rohag, mopey and everyone else on the AS IS bus.
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  #168  
Old Jun 26, 2020, 07:41 AM
little turtle little turtle is offline
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i am going to start a new group at my library...

the golden rule group....
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  #169  
Old Jun 26, 2020, 12:29 PM
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Thirty shades Thirty shades is offline
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i am going to start a new group at my library...

the golden rule group....
The very best of luck with your golden rule group LT.

Will it be similar to the bus?
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  #170  
Old Jun 26, 2020, 12:32 PM
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My day has been crazy

I struggle with life, all things... Things that I would have once dealt with are now a challenge.

I am grateful to the support from all of you very kind people on the bus.
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  #171  
Old Jun 26, 2020, 01:20 PM
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Mopey Mopey is offline
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i am going to start a new group at my library...

the golden rule group....
Interesting. Are you able to physically go there, turtle? I mean, with the Covid situation and all?
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  #172  
Old Jun 26, 2020, 02:31 PM
little turtle little turtle is offline
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The very best of luck with your golden rule group LT.

Will it be similar to the bus?
thanks TS....i hope it will be a good bus ride...
we will be talking about... how you want to behave
in this awful world...
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  #173  
Old Jun 26, 2020, 02:34 PM
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Interesting. Are you able to physically go there, turtle? I mean, with the Covid situation and all?
i hope the library opens up soon...i may have to start at the tavern...
thanks Mopey for asking...
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  #174  
Old Jun 26, 2020, 03:07 PM
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i hope the library opens up soon...i may have to start at the tavern...
thanks Mopey for asking...
Sorry turtle, but------

TAVERN?????
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  #175  
Old Jun 26, 2020, 05:40 PM
little turtle little turtle is offline
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Sorry turtle, but------

TAVERN?????
i spend time at a local tavern...i love it
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