[SingDanceRunLife]

I hate this I hate this I hate this...

Yesterday wasn't so good.

Basically, my mom went into bad territory with me (short story is she asked if I think I'm depressed and that set me off although I kept it inside), then she told me I needed to get out of the house and do something...So, I went ice skating which was OK.

However, last night, after the new year came and whatever, I broke down. I cried, and I couldn't help myself and I was blah.

Today, I went to see Sweeny Todd with my friend. An unpleasant surprise came when I walked into the theater and saw her brother (who I dislike) and friend who I barely know. I thought it was just going to be the two of us. Whatever. I mean, it was OK. The movie was good.

Anyway, right now, I'm tired, and I want to cry. I have no idea why, but I'm not in a good mood at all.

A little while ago, I started feeling really bad. I started crying. I made myself stop. I was tired, and honestly, sleep sounds so great right now, but I want to be able to sleep through the night. So, I put on a movie that I enjoy...My plan didn't work so well to have some fun and enjoy myself. I was in and out of sleep, and my little sisters kept knocking on my door, and then I had to come up for dinner.

...And to make things worse - I have to go back to school tomorrow.

CRY!

[mrsmoggles]

Awwwwww, Hun I am soooooooooooooooo sorry. It sounds like no matter what you are doing, it is just bound n determined to blow up in your face...I am soo sorry.

Some days, weeks, months even seem to just blah...And I hope you get some sleep and your first day back to school are smooth flowing and easy going. HUGSSSSS You know where I am is you wanna rant, let it all out...~melanie

[SingDanceRunLife]

Thanks Mrs.

[mrsmoggles]

ANYTIME dear heart, sweet soul, loving person that you are!!! You are awesome in every way important to me!!! Just take care and take a drink for me!! ~ Mel

[SingDanceRunLife]

I'm about to go do the dishes and then call Z. I haven't talked to him since Sunday, and I really need to.

After that, bed, and then school.

[turquoisesea]

such a tough time of year this can be -.-
my sisters going back to school tommorrow too...
good luck going through the day try your best to keep going
*hugs* I know it's hard but you can do it

[mrsmoggles]

hums a lullaby,
lalalala go to sleep
go to sleep
go to sleep dear siiiiinnnnnggggg,
it is nite time and schools tomorrow
so go to sleep and dream away
all your pain and sorrow,
so go to sleep
go to sleep

hehe I make the worst mother...oh well, i tried...luv n hugs Mel

[SingDanceRunLife]

Nice song :P

I was long asleep by the time you posted that one. I fell asleep probably around 12:30.

I don't think you make a bad mother. You try, and you're sweet.

[SingDanceRunLife]

I am a FAKE FAKE FAKE!

I spent all day using fake energy, fake smiles, fake conversation...Grr.

Plus, doing that is super tiring.

[SingDanceRunLife]

So...I pretty much broke down today. Bad day, might write more later...Cried...Parents tried to get me to talk...Cried...Talked to friend...

And tomorrow is going to be a looong day (church, get lunch, costume fitting for Fame, then rehearsal 1-9).

[mrsmoggles]

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((SING)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
:wave_ hello:
(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((SING)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((SING)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
:wave_ hello:
(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((SING)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

I am sorry you having a bad time. Wish there was something I could do to help. melanie

[SingDanceRunLife]

Rehearsal was OK yesterday...Quite long, and I had a headache for at least the last half of it, maybe longer (I honestly don't even remember most of the day)...And I'm surprised that I made it! But, I did.

Today is another long day...School, hang out with friend for an hour ( - haven't been able to do so in like 3 weeks!!!), choir, then rehearsal 6:30-8:45.

[mrsmoggles]

((((((((((((((((((((((sing)))))))))))))))

huggles, I am glad you made it thru and you can get a break with a friend!! I hope that goes well!

melanie

[mlpHolmes]

Wow I have seen so much Love through your entire thread cry, from others. It is awesome!!! Just you knowing we are all here for you & really care about you, I hope gives you warm comfort. You are special indeed, & thank you for sharing some of you burden,thoughts & feelings. I hope talking about it helps you.

Always,Forever, plus a Day!
Marian

[SingDanceRunLife]

Thanks guys.

I had an OK time with my friend (it would've been better but I was really tired, not feeling great - had sort of a headache, and extremely out of it)...He kept telling me that I needed to go home and sleep (and I agreed)!

I went to choir, and that was tough. I was feeling really bad throughout it. Hungry, tired, kinda dizzy...Bad. A little more than halfway through, I decided not to go to Fame rehearsal tonight because I thought I'd keel over if I did.

So, I came home, ate dinner, did my homework (just finished), and now I'm going to head down to my bed. Whether I'll actually be able to sleep this early or not is a different matter, but I definitely need rest.
I may or may not be going to school tomorrow.

[Fuzzybear]

((((((((((((( SingDanceRunLife )))))))))))))

[mrsmoggles]

((((((((((((((((((((sing)))))))))))))))))))))))
Thank goodness you didn't go to rehearsal and you hopefully got some rest. Take care!! Huggles, melanie

[SingDanceRunLife]

I didn't go to school or rehearsal today. I felt sick, so I decided to do nothing. I didn't really sleep or anything, but I also didn't do anything, so I got some rest.

[SingDanceRunLife]

I basically feel like my brain's been turned off or something. I'm going through the day and motions, but not really functioning. I can't figure out if this is better or worse than feeling really bad.

[Susan27]

hi sing! i know what you mean about going thru the motions but there's no meaning. what's worse...they both suck. sorry for the language..they just do.

hanging in there like you are...
susan

[SingDanceRunLife]

I completely agree that both of them suck. *Sigh* At least there's a chance of me starting to get better...I'm starting therapy tomorrow.

((((((((SingDanceRunLife))))))))))))))))

(((((((((((((((Susan27))))))))))))))))))))))

[SingDanceRunLife]

Was only half functioning again today...

It's weird...I feel like I must be really down right now, but I can't feel it since I'm not feeling anything at the moment...

I don't even know what's going on anymore.

[turquoisesea]

awww I hate not being able to feel anything -.-
keep trying... the numbness will eventually go away... I hope something good replaces it, or at least hope that it gives you a kind of reprieve if only for a moment

*hugs*

[SingDanceRunLife]

Thanks.

I hope the numbness goes away soon...I've never been this numb for this long (I've been this way since Monday I think).