[Rose76]

Dreamt I was going to the hospital to visit my love. Then woke to reality. Made me sad.

[hiddenaway]

Well, that didn’t last long cause just about everything is making me cry today.

I wish I could cuddle up with Drew until I feel better.

It's been an alright kind of day, though a couple of things were disappointing. I got my medical result and it was not as good as I had hoped. It's not bad but I felt like it should have been better. And then the Jacuzzi at where I live is shut down again. It seems like it's been shut down a lot this year. I miss it when I can't use it.

[Rose76]

I'm doing ok. My apartment is still messy from me being depressed recently. Achilles tendonitis also is hampering me getting work done. I'm happy about recent weight loss.

no sleep, no plans, I'm a ****ing joke..

Originally Posted by raging vortex

no sleep, no plans, I'm a ****ing joke..

I know how you feel. I feel the same way. You are not a joke, you're far from it. I know I can feel that way about myself.

Originally Posted by will19

I know how you feel. I feel the same way. You are not a joke, you're far from it. I know I can feel that way about myself.

thanks, it's just so hard to think of something I've done that isn't eating, peeing, staring at a wall taking meds, or crying

doesn't exactly fill me with confidence

[Buffy01]

I am wondering :sadhug if me holding in my anger is causing me to feel depressed :sadhug.

[hiddenaway]

I’m…okay.

Somebody on another site I frequent replied to one of my posts in a game thread with ‘hit Drew Carey over the head with a 2x4’ and even though it was meant as a joke, I didn’t see it that way.

I - I’ve felt like crying all day cause Drew means so much to me and that hurt. It was like if somebody insulted my significant other, yknow?

[TheGal]

Today ... I feel like crawling under a rock.

feel terrible, and it's not even because of no sleep.

Possible trigger:

I'm still alive. that's why I feel terrible

[TheGal]

@raging vortex


I'm worried about you.

Do you have a pdoc, psychologist and support around you?

I have major depression with psychotic features and I required earlier intervention, but didn't get it. I don't wish that on anyone.


Reach out to support in real life where you can be safe. Don't wait and see, reach out now.

Did the usual cleaning in the morning. Earlier in the morning before cleaning, I went to the grocery to pick up a couple of things I forgot to get when I went shopping yesterday. And now it's afternoon and the cleaning is over. I feel let down.

I miss the Jacuzzi at where I live. I'm sure it's going to take a while to get that done! And the atmosphere at where I live is not positive as the neighbors are not getting along. It's too bad.

[Rose76]

A pipe burst in my kitchen making a mess. It's been replaced. Now I have to clean up the kitchen. I just don't feel like doing that. Maybe tomorrow. I did get all the water mopped up.

I keep having plumbing emergencies.

[Buffy01]

I don’t know how I am feeling :confused just in between feeling numb and down.

I'm feeling depressed this morning. My only friend and I have been arguing a lot lately and it seems like a lot of things he says doesn't make sense. I feel like letting him go but there's no one else to replace him. I've been on the lookout to replace him but there doesn't seem to be anybody. So I don't know.

This morning, after getting out bed, I'm feeling some kind numbness on the fingertips of my right hand. I'm feeling it on my thumb, index finger, and middle finger. Also there's numbness at the lower right hand corner at the palm. I don't know what it is. I've never had this before.

[Buffy01]

Originally Posted by raging vortex

feel terrible, and it's not even because of no sleep.

Possible trigger:

I'm still alive. that's why I feel terrible

I’m sorry that you are struggling right now :grouphug. Remember “ In Every Pothole There Is Hope” - Steve Martin Mixed Nuts

[hiddenaway]

Busy day today. Honestly, I’m just glad to be home so I can make up for all of the hours I wasn’t able to love on Drew.

[Rose76]

I'm going through a rough interval right now. It will blow over. These spells always do. For now, though, I feel bad.

An acquaintance contacted me. I'ld almost call her a friend, but I don't hear from her that often. She moves in and out of town frequently. She just moved back to this area, and has a bunch of problems. So she's been calling me and unloading all her complaints. I'm trying to be nice, but I have to set a limit to how much I can listen to.

today I saw a commercial for funeral planning and immediately felt comforted

don't know what to make of that

This day has barely got started and already it has some problems. Around 2 AM a man who lives at my apartment complex collapsed outside in the courtyard. I don't know what he was doing out there at that time. I know who he is. He doesn't seem like he's in good health when I last saw him. I feel bad for him.

At 8 I unexpectedly got a call from the Urologist's office. It was the nurse who called me to say that I have to get a prescription because I have a urinary infection. I've had them before. It was a real shock to get that call this morning. I took a Lab test last Tuesday and thought that everything was fine.

I stated earlier that I had split up with my friend. I sent him a message telling him how I feel. He replied back saying that he never wants to let me go. Well, since I feel like there's some troubles going on, I called him and told him and told him what's going on. He was helpful to me. For some strange reason, every time I split up with him, troubles happen so I end up taking him back. It's hard to deal with troubles alone.

This year is about halfway over and it hasn't been a good one so far. Lots of unexpected problems have come my way. It seems like that's the way it is for many other people I know.

[Rose76]

I'm doing better now than this morning, which is a welcome improvement. Last night I was horribly depressed.

My biggest worry now is that I'm real low on my pain killers. When I run out ahead of when I can get a refill, it's a real problem. 36 hours without a Vicodin tablet, and I start getting withdrawal symptoms. Akathisia is horrible.

After a pipe breaking and leaking water in my kitchen, I've had clean-up work to do. It's a lot of stooping and bending . . . hard to do without pain medication.

[Buffy01]

I began feeling :sadhug really awful today because I felt humiliated and hurt .

extremely bad today

I was busy this morning. I got a haircut, in which I hadn't had one in the last three or four months. I did some light shopping afterwards. I'm feeling fatigued. I didn't sleep well last night and haven't slept well in a while. This is the time of year when I feel at my worst. June seems to be the peak time of feeling bad.

I started my antibiotic yesterday. I'm feeling different now. I feel depressed but also I'm feeling like I'm in the twilight zone. It's like I'm not feeling at home. I'm on the antibiotic regimen for a week and there seems to be some adjustments I have to make from my normal routine. The sun's out and it's warmer, but I don't feel happy about it. I should like everyone else does but I don't.