People tell me I'm worthless and stupid.
Then other people tell me I'm not.
People tell me I'm a whiner with no place.
Then other people say that's a lie.
People tell me I deserve bad, I'm useless.
Then other people disagree.
I never know who's right

I hate whining I hate complaining, saying life is unfair, saying things should be different, crying. I don't like dragging people down. Sometimes my friends tell me to IM/PM/phone them anytime but I'm stupid and I'm even scared of initiating any kind of discussion because I'm scared of dragging people down

Why do things always have to turn out this way I feel worthless, I feel stupid, I feel like all of this things, so I must be
I feel so alone

[katheryn]

belive in your self dont belive what others say about you, belive you are kind person who has a lovely g/f and those twins
they belive in you belive in your self

your going through very bad time soon these will pass, you are not bringing ppl down you are not a whinner

((((((((((((((griffe))))))))))))

[stefano]

Hey! I like to whine! I am Black Belt Whiner!
If I don't like things, I whine, I write sad peotries and paint gloomy sketches. And if somebody is dragged down I just say: "THAT IS MY VIEW!"

A little more seriously. Always tell people that you are grateful for attention even if you don't show it. That their presence helps even if you still seem at the bottom of the pit. Help them understand.

And regarding wether you are worth or not. Remember that depressed people are alway biased against them selves.

Good Luck

[nightbird]

((((griffe))))

hope you find the encouragement you need.

i find it helps as much as a hug.

peace and encouragement,
nightbird

[Christina86]

((((((((((Griffe))))))))))))))

Okay, first - cognitive distortions. Feeling bad doesn't make you bad - feelings are not absolute, they change.

I do understand how hard it is to accept the positive when all we've heard is the negative at a younger age... I had another argument with a person actually an hour or so ago. He said I was beautiful. I said I wasn't (don't feel I am). So I had to admit defeat when he said ... well, some people are entitled to think that you're beautiful, even if you think they're wrong (or crazy!)

I hate whining too... but I'm good at it sometimes. Other times I feel redundant, like I'm just saying the same stuff over and over again... I also think I drag people down talking about stuff too. (Doesn't help when some people agree with that either!)

You are not alone. I promise. It takes time to heal and decide how you really feel about who you are.

Do YOU think you're worthless or stupid? Or can you rephrase that and say maybe - "sometimes I make bad decisions"?

Do YOU think you whine too much? Or maybe you just think that you're going through a hard time and just venting?

Do YOU think you're bad and useless, or do you believe that everyone has a purpose, and that 99.99% of people aren't bad?

Would you call anyone any of the things you think you are?

.... I'm sorry. I have a tendency to go overboard sometimes with trying to help. I'm sorry if I sound harsh, I don't intend to be. Sometimes my help sounds more like a lecture or a therapy session.

((((((((((Vince)))))))))))))

Can I tell you who I think you are (from my perspective)?

I think you're a nice guy, who's just going through a tough time, and who hasn't had an easy life up to this point. I think you're hard on yourself, but that's understandable. I think you're a wonderful person, and definetely worthy of love and respect.

Now I'm just going to send you some 'love'

PM me anytime if you want to vent. I promise you, if I'm busy I'll tell you... but I'm extending the invitation, to say whatever you want to me.

[gimmeice]

(((((((((((( Griffe )))))))))))))))))
I am sorry that you are feeling bad about yourself.

TY everyone

In all honesty, I do find I whine too much It can be hard to tell what I'm thinking and what's just been hammered into my head I guess, but I read back on what I write and I think that I sound stupid. I try to pride myself on being tough (which I am far from) and crying and complaining at all always comes off as a weak trait when it's in myself

I wouldn't call anyone what they call me, I try to be polite when I can. I just call myself these things, and so do other people.

[Christina86]

((((((((((((Griffe)))))))))))))))

If it's any consolation, I have the same feelings about some of the posts I make in the "heat of the moment" when I'm in a highly emotional state. But it helps sometimes to post... so I do it anyways, because people don't judge you here if you're in a bad spot emotionally when you post.

You're a good, great, wonderful guy.

[john4]

Re: Griffe
If it is any consolation, I'm standing by you at what is a difficult time for you . . . .

[kebsfroggy]

We all a whiners at one time or another.

Although I'm a frog of little brain, I say go for it. Here people listen, offer helpful suggestions which you may not have thought of and (no matter how silly others think of the practice) some just offer a hug.

Everyone has been through the whining stage at one point or another. Why shouldn't you have your turn.

Be good to yourself.

[RozG]

((((((Griffe))))))

i think you're a wonderful, caring person...you're none of those bad things you say. people who say those things about you are the ones with a problem. and i've never thought of you as a whine...it's healthy to let it all out, especially here with friends. please be gentle with yourself coz you DO matter. sorry that's all i've got tonight plus

[Fuzzybear]

((((((((((((( Griffe )))))))))))))
You're a wonderful person, don't believe "those" people (they suck)

love
Fuzzy

[Fuzzybear]

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
kebsfroggy said:
We all a whiners at one time or another.

Although I'm a frog of little brain, I say go for it. Here people listen, offer helpful suggestions which you may not have thought of and (no matter how silly others think of the practice) some just offer a hug.

Everyone has been through the whining stage at one point or another. Why shouldn't you have your turn.

Be good to yourself.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

Theres a lot of grey matter packed into kebs little brain

TY Keb, you're the wisest frog I know
((( Roz )))
((( Fuzzy )))
TY


have to see my T tomorrow, wanting to cancel
had a terrible rough night last night, so tired of all this
seems like it never gets easier
been crying too much... guess it's an old childhood thing kicking in but to me crying always equals weak when i do it.

[katheryn]

today seeing your t sounds like a struggle but if you manage to get there and try to talk to t you might feel a little better after

crying is a relief valve if you didnt cry when your in such pain you would bottle it up and eventually it will all come spilling out later

[freespirit1980]

Giffe:

I honestly know where you're coming from. All the symptoms you've described I felt before I got on a medication to work.

It's rare that those, especially in the workplace, that never suffered from Clinical Depression understand what we go through.

Changing meds is a great idea, as Effixer clearly doesn't work for you. There are many others that might.

In the meantime, you might want to consider applying for Social Security Disability. There are lawyers that specialize in this and work on a contingency basis. It is difficult enough to to deal with life with a depressed mind, let alone the pressure of "not making mistakes."

all i'm allowed to say on here without getting in trouble

[Fuzzybear]

((((((((((((( griffe )))))))))))))))
sitting next to you

(((griffe))))))))))))))))))))))))
KNow we all care about you
((you matter here)))))))))))))))))
we are all sitting with you
holding you up
muffy

[Christina86]

((((((((((Vince))))))))))))))))

You can get through this.

(((((((((((((((((((Griffe)))))))))))))))))))))))))

you are loved .... please go to your t. You need to go .... you WILL get through this, please look at the love surrounding you, lifting you, we all care andare routing for you, crying is NOT weak ...... you need to cry to grieve ..... the more you cry the better you will feel ...... the only thing to make you feel better right now is time ..... in that time you will learn to manage your pain, your deep emotional pain, in that time you will learn how to nurture you ..... and during that time we are here to hold you up......you are a good father, and you will carry on being that good father because your children will have everything you didn't have ... love, care and a dad they can look up to ...... you can do this Vince..... we all have faith in you. gentle hugs,Kerry xoxoxoxoxo love ya dude