I fail as a father, a partner and a friend.
I feel so bad for my kids because they deserve so much better than me.
I feel bad for everyone because I'm a weight and I drag them down.
I shouldn't still be here. Hurts too much

[reddevil]

((((((((((((((griffe))))))))))))

I wish you didn't hurt so much.. but you should still be here.

You do the best you can for your kids. That's all that matters.. in the end, what they deserve doesn't matter, because it so rarely has anything to do with what anyone has.

It's up to everyone else to not let them be dragged down. You are doing the best you can.

[nowheretorun]

you still have time to choose health Griffe.. start by shaking off the load of guilt for not feeling well... that will help some... you might feel bad about 'dragging others down' .. dragging yourself down further isnt helping... take the hands of help offered you... if you stay on the down arc i will guarantee you a life of misery.... you have the power to change it... be your own best friend awhile, then offer your support to others.... they need a friend also..

[pegasus]

Originally Posted by Griffe

I fail as a father, a partner and a friend.
I feel so bad for my kids because they deserve so much better than me.
I feel bad for everyone because I'm a weight and I drag them down.
I shouldn't still be here. Hurts too much

I'm sure your children need you, I'm sure your partner loves you and you have many friends here. Hang in there.

(((((((((( Griffe )))))))))))

[katheryn]

[Justgiving]

Please don't ever give up.

No child needs a perfect father. All they need is your love.

((((((((((((Griffe)))))))))))))

So daddy is a little hurt
Even if daddy is hurting the babies will be okay because they still love their daddy, and with daddy gone they will be sad because they know their daddy loves them too.

[Fuzzybear]

(((((((((((((( griffe ))))))))))))))

They all deserve better. I cause nothing but pain, sadness and anger. I can't do anything right. My kids? They deserve a good father, not me, they deserve so much better. I failed with Vlad. I'm failing them.

I shouldn't even be here. Everyone would be happier if I wasn't. Friends? Half the people who say we're friends wouldn't care if I was gone. I wouldn't be missed. People would see how much better they are with me gone.

I want my kids to have a good life and I think I realize that I'm holding everyone back because I'm just a stupid idiot who shouldn't be here I know what the noble thing for me to do would be and I'd get in trouble for saying it here but I hurt too much and the world would be better off

If you caused nothing but pain, sadness, and anger then they wouldn't e with you right now. But they love you. And you deserve to be loved. And they don't deserve losing what they love.

Griffe
CAn you get help from your T or drs
sounds like things have gotten not so good again...
Your kids need you as you know
I hope you can find the strenght with in you to get the help you need
as you know my thoughts that you do matter
that everyone here does.....
please know i care...or I would not tell you to ask for help
muffy

Went to T today... it's a waste, I don't see how I'm worth it, most people don't care. The pain... Not worth it, kids don't need me, no distraction Why bother, it hurts and I'm worhless

[Fuzzybear]

((((((((((((( griffe )))))))))))))))
You aren't worthless (maybe its a lie someone fed to you )
You're worth the work to recover and heal

[Einna]

Griffe,
I may be out of line in saying this, but when I've struggled with the crap, the pain, trying to figure out what is what, etc. - I'm thinking in the "me" - it all revolves around "me" - but here's the kicker - it doesn't revolve around me. When I look inward, what a mess, what a failure... but when I look at my kid, the kid is worth whatever crap I may be feeling or going through. I'm not perfect - far, far from it. I've thought often times that my kid deserved a better mother - but you know what, no matter... I am the mother, period. My kid doesn't want a different mother, wants me. I suspect it's the same with your kiddos - they don't want any body else, they want you, period. It's not "you" with money, job, good looks, etc, etc, etc - it's YOU, their father. No one can replace you, no matter what. You are the ONLY YOU there is - like it or not, it's true. You may feel that you are not worth it... if it helps, break your days down into hours and get through each hour doing the best you can. You might be surprised to find out that you are your own worst critic - others may not see you in the same light you see yourself. For now, take each hour and do your best to get through it. Don't believe the negative crap going on inside - that part isn't worth it. I read in another post a great idea - think of something positive that's happened each hour. I know it may sound silly, but in my house, I'm thankful the toilet didn't run over - it would be one more thing to add to everything else that I don't need right now... so, I'm thankful for a dry floor. Who knows, in another hour it will be something else that is positive. Just please, please be safe, ok?
Einna