[lmg103]

i've been freaking out today, last night i got really upset but since ive been home i have kinda just stayed and not left my room. and i was walking my dogs with my dad today and he mentioned something like im not good talking about my feelings but i know your not happy...like i dont talk to my parents about my feelings or just anythign at all really. i never had that relationship with them. and recently things have not been good with me but i still never talked to them about what's REALLY going on. and he was asking me all these questions, like who do you talk to when your feeling depressed and all this stuff. and it made me feel really awkward i just walked really fast ahead of him and kept saying stopp im finee. i just dont have the nerve to tell them how i really feel. they know ive been using drugs and stuff but not really the reasons behind it all. i just dont know what to do. i couldnt go back to my house after for a little while because ifelt awkward. ahhhhh sorry just had to get that off my chest

[turquoisesea]

*hugs*

I never talk about things to my parents either. I was kinda forced to , because they found out what was going on. It helped them that I told them some basic things. I have NOT gone into details. But they feel better because I'm "finally more open to them"

so maybe it's not too bad to let them in on a few small things, since they know some of it anyway.

Parents are there to care for you - that doesnt mean we trust them, just... they're not out to get us even though it seems that way sometimes

loads of hugs

~turquoisesea

[lifelesstraveled]

I completely understand. I dont have an open relationship with my parents either. We dont talk about our "feelings" and thoughts. Most of the time if I got upset or started crying I was sent to my room and told to shut up. they dont know anything that is going on with me and were never really interested. Right now if they tried to "talk" to me I think I'd give them a good tongue lashing, which is why I hope they don't say anything to me and just let me be like they have been since I was born. Why flip the script now, you know???

Are you in therapy? If you dont feel like you have anyone else to talk to about what's really going on with you, please see a therapist if you arent seeing one already. It's REALLY hard to talk about things you have kept to yourself, but i am learning that it' important to do so. Good Luck!

[lmg103]

yea like why is my dad all the sudden deciding to talk about my feelings now. its just alll so weird to me. and i kind of made it obvious i didnt wanna talk to him about it i denied it all and he just kept talking and asking questions. likeee get the point i dont wanna talk about this with you. ill come to you if i need you at some point.

im just starting therapy now, and back at school i'll be going. i think its about time i go i have been putting it off for way to long now.

Originally Posted by lifelesstraveled

I completely understand. I dont have an open relationship with my parents either. We dont talk about our "feelings" and thoughts. Most of the time if I got upset or started crying I was sent to my room and told to shut up. they dont know anything that is going on with me and were never really interested. Right now if they tried to "talk" to me I think I'd give them a good tongue lashing, which is why I hope they don't say anything to me and just let me be like they have been since I was born. Why flip the script now, you know???

Are you in therapy? If you dont feel like you have anyone else to talk to about what's really going on with you, please see a therapist if you arent seeing one already. It's REALLY hard to talk about things you have kept to yourself, but i am learning that it' important to do so. Good Luck!

[gimmeice]

(((((((((((((( lmg ))))))))))))))))))

I agree that it feels very strange when your parents suddenly take an interest, my mom has recently tried to take an interest in my mental health which usually makes me angry, why couldn't she have done that when I was a child? Why now when I am adult with a family of my own? I am sending you loads of hugs.

[Tumnus]

Originally Posted by lmg103

yea like why is my dad all the sudden deciding to talk about my feelings now. its just alll so weird to me. and i kind of made it obvious i didnt wanna talk to him about it i denied it all and he just kept talking and asking questions. likeee get the point i dont wanna talk about this with you. ill come to you if i need you at some point.

im just starting therapy now, and back at school i'll be going. i think its about time i go i have been putting it off for way to long now.

It was disturbing to me when my dad first showed he cared about my feelings, too. And I still keep him at arm's length. But I regret not letting my mom into my life earlier. She can be obnoxious but she really does care. Is either one of them safe enough to try sharing a couple things with, just to start?

[lmg103]

i can share with both of them, but i don't feel comfortable yet. idk if i ever will. im bad with expressing myself. i just dont even know what i would tell them. it just scares me thinking about it. i just went blank today when my dad was saying all that stuff...i just had nothing to say and pushed him away by yelling at him. he obviously knows that there is somethingwrong by the way i acted when he asked me the questions.......so if he does again maybe ill have the courage toactually say something.

Originally Posted by Tumnus

It was disturbing to me when my dad first showed he cared about my feelings, too. And I still keep him at arm's length. But I regret not letting my mom into my life earlier. She can be obnoxious but she really does care. Is either one of them safe enough to try sharing a couple things with, just to start?

[Tumnus]

Originally Posted by lmg103

i can share with both of them, but i don't feel comfortable yet. idk if i ever will. im bad with expressing myself. i just dont even know what i would tell them.

It's okay if you're not comfortable yet. You may have to wait for the right timing. I think I started talking to my mom just by saying that I actually missed her when I went to college. Didn't share much else. Then moved on to some past stuff that I was sorry for, nothing current. That was over ten years ago. I'm usually pretty good at expressing myself but I'm just now getting to where I can tell my mom some of the stuff as it's happening and not freak out about a reaction. Some of it just comes with time. And I think some things are better left unsaid to parents.