[Zen888]

I am sad and lonely most of the time. I rarely feel happy unless I have bought something.

I have lost the ability to cry on the outside so that people can see that I am sad or in pain. I only ever cry on the inside to the point that I am trembling and my thoughts are racing.

I have no mental health profs. to talk to at the moment. And no close friends that I would feel comfortable opening up to. I fear being abandoned if I were to share my thoughts and feelings. I have no family since both of my parents have passed on and my brother wants nothing to do with me at all.

I feel very alone and sad. Even when I am around people ... say at the grocery store or where ever..... I feel totally alone like I am the only person left in this world.

I have to depend on myself to comfort when I am sad or feeling lonely. I dream of the day were I will have people that can stand beside me and comfort me ... and not run away.

[my3sns]

I am going through a tough time right now , so i am not sure what to say , but want you to know that you are heard and not alone .. I understand

[idontknow13]

Zen, I feel for you, that is about all I can say since I feel just about the same as you, but dont ever give up sharing, you will find someone to comfort you.
Thinking of you and hoping you will soon feel better

[pegasus]

Gentle hugs (((((( Zen ))))))

We learn to stop ourselves crying at a young age and learn how to hide our feelings. It's ok to express your feelings and cry if you need to. I'm sorry you feel so lonely, we are here sitting with you.

[miray]

((((Zen))) .....I do know what you are going through. Hope it gets better for you. Know there is an entire community here with many caring and helpful people. We all need a little support sometimes

[silver_moon]

((((((Zen))))))))

zen i know exactly what you are going through my sister will not talk to me or see her kids i have no one i can open up too either iam in therapy but i still need to trust my theraptist iam here for you drop me a pm anytimr will get back to you as soon as possible i care

loser37

[Pomegranate]

Zen

You sound so unhappy. I hope you are able to find professional help of some kind soon.

Maybe when you are out with other people, like at the store, you can look around, look for someone else who looks sad. You can make a point of walking by that person and giving them a big smile and hello. Just to acknowledge them as another person, like you would like people to do for you. You may not feel like smiling but knowing you made someone else feel "noticed" if only for a moment, might help you feel better. And I do hope you feel better soon.

[Fuzzybear]

[Berries]

(((((((((((((((ZEN))))))))))))



I am so sorry you feel so alone. But don't forget about all the people here, who care very much about you!!!

[justfloating]

((((((((((((((((zen)))))))))))))))))))

So sorry you're feeling lonely right now. Know that there are people here who care about you and want you to get well. Sending lots of hugs.

[scattermom]

Hi Zen, I totally get what you are saying, I've noticed alot of us share that feeling. I know I do, I have a mother who doesn't get it at all. If you ever need someone to chat with, I hope I can help. The only thing that gets me by is my 2 kids. I hope you have a better day.

[MisanthropicOne]

Originally Posted by Zen888

I have lost the ability to cry on the outside so that people can see that I am sad or in pain. I only ever cry on the inside to the point that I am trembling and my thoughts are racing.

I fear being abandoned if I were to share my thoughts and feelings.

I feel very alone and sad. Even when I am around people

This I understand. I rarely show emotion on the outside. I feel like crying a lot but it never comes out. I know what I feel.. without actually feeling it. Its like there's a road emotions travel to reach the surface but mine never make it cuz the bridge is out. The only feelings able to surface are anger and frustration.. I guess they drive off road vehicles.

It seems whenever I try to talk to my family I get responses like "you shouldn't feel that way" or things get all turned around and it becomes about how them. How I make them feel.. In the end im wrong for feeling the way that I do and no one wants to, or can, listen. I'm alone.

No matter what i may feel there's always this emptiness inside me. Waiting to swallow up everything I feel and its so damn frustrating. In the end everything I feel and everyone I love disappear.

I live in a world full of people yet I am always alone.

[artichack]

Hello Zen...have you tried any support groups...I know here in my area there are meetings for people suffering from depression. You might try striking up a conversation at the book store...I hang out alot at barnes and noble...good place to just say hello to someone...smile...most people are open for friendly talk. Good luck...knowing your not alone here!~

[Justgiving]

When you are used to hiding your feelings it's very hard to open up. All kind of thoughts and emotions comes in play.

There is million of people in this world who are extremelly sad but, like you, don't say it. Maybe someone you see often is, but is also too scare to say it.

You see dear one, I know by what you have been writing here in PC, that if someone would come to you and share how much they are sad, you would surely listen and give them your support. They are also other people that, like you, would listen to you if you would share your sadness and they would give you their confort. It might be IRL and it might be online but their is always people who do understand.

Give a chance to trust.