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#1
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vicki took 150 mg of my trazadone just before seeing T. she brought 2 pills but only took one. T has other one along with a handful of pills vicki gave her mon.
she is triggered very easily right now. today it was because she told T yesterday that she knew all inside persons and told a story about a "cleaning lady" that only comes out when the house is dirty. V said that she lied about that and there is no cleaning lady. but she was really scared and took the pill because she figured if T was going to punish her or hit her for lying she would be sleeping and not feel it. (this is what T related to me). i can't find my last 3 150 mg pills. i haven't told my husband as he is already way concerned, ofcourse. i am not feeling really safe. T told V that if she felt scared she could stay inside until she felt safe. V likes being out. i can sometimes be co conscious and know what she is doing but other times not. today not. even sometimes i can "see" what she is doing but can't stop her. i feel helpless and scared. any one else "been there, done that" ???? my life is good. i don't want to lose it. w_i |
#2
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((((((((((((((w_i)))))))))))))
if you fear for your safety, you should tell hubby who can watch you (which would be hard on both), call t or go to hosp. first, i would find out how much 3 pills would hurt the body and then make the decision on what's necessary to keep the body safe. gl and let us know. kd
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#3
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(((((((for vikki and you, w_i))))))))
i can't say i've been there done that, but i know 'helpless and scared' really well. i agree that perhaps you should ask your husband to watch you. he may already be way concerned but an informed concern is much better than nameless worry. i'm sure he'd rather know how hard things are for you than to have you struggling through on your own. just hang in there. feel free to pm me anytime you want. Vikki is welcome to do the same. just hold on.
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i tear my heart open i sew myself shut my weakness is that i care too much the scars remind me the past is real i tear my heart open just to feel ~Papa Roach |
#4
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hubby has all meds. found the ones vicki hid. she's not happy, but at least we are safer. no hospital T thinks vicki will not do well (nor will the littles) besides, T won't be able to treat us in patient--not good for us. trying to hang in, but i still sense rough waters ahead. i can't swim!!!
w_i |
#5
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"i still sense rough waters ahead. i can't swim!!!"
We have a boat equipped with life preservers. ![]() Thanks for checking in. Petunia |
#6
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Be kind to her. Have you ever asked her if she was lying or protecting. If lied why she lied? We have a cleaner who was kept secret for a long time. Thing is her cleaning is obcessive and many things get pitched and if hubby were not around we prbly wouldn't have much left. Oops srry! don't want to hijack.
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#7
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vicki told T in a note that she wants T to like her. she is very compliant and seems to say what T wants to hear. T asked her if she knew any others inside. V then just started to tell about others that she now says really aren't there. i am getting confused.
V has been quiet now since Thurs. i assume she is laying low for awhile. she really has been thru the ringer lately. i am exhausted too. w_i |
#8
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Sometimes i gotta do something like that just to be listened to. I'ts not about rules but it could be if you know what i mean. nobody wants to hear me now so it don't matter no how. Some others can take up alot of energy. i don't. cool and calm and cutting that's me. nona.
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#9
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not to hijack but...nona, i want to hear you and i'm sure that the rest of us here at PC do to. Every part has an equally valid voice...that means you too.
w_i, i know you're exhausted and V probably is too...i'm glad that things have calmed down a little for you, i hope you get a chance to catch up on your rest. hang in there... (((((((((w_i)))))))) (((((((((((Vikki))))))))))) and nona... (((((((((((nona))))))))) -shadowdancer
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i tear my heart open i sew myself shut my weakness is that i care too much the scars remind me the past is real i tear my heart open just to feel ~Papa Roach |
#10
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thanks for all the encouragement and caring.
nona--feel free to talk about stuff. you're just as important as everyone else. w_i |
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