[monarch_butterfly]

Since my T confirmed that my little Anna is most likely an alter. (My T has experience in trauma counseling and is a psychologist) i have been thinking back over the past years. In 2005 i was in patient at a couple of psych units. One more acute then (the other. At the acute one i got diagnosed with depression with psychosis.

I now question this diagnosis. I was obviously depressed as i was suicidal and was activly trying to do stuff.. when the staff asked me if i could hear voices i saidd yes. Because i could. A mans and a womans. But they were far away and i couldn't tell what they were saying. I just know it wasn't directions like kill ypurself etc. I told staff at the time it was like radio without the static..

But i think I'm wrong. I think the far awayness and inability to hear exactly what they were saying compares almost exactly to when Anna is far away from me and talking from a distance. So i am thinking those two are also alters. I haven't heard them since 2005. But I'd think their still there.

Has anyone else been diagnosed with psychosis and later discovered it was really alters and thus DID? And does my theory re Anna and the 2 possible year 2005 alters make sense? Any other thoughts?

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by monarch_butterfly

Since my T confirmed that my little Anna is most likely an alter. (My T has experience in trauma counseling and is a psychologist) i have been thinking back over the past years. In 2005 i was in patient at a couple of psych units. One more acute then (the other. At the acute one i got diagnosed with depression with psychosis.

I now question this diagnosis. I was obviously depressed as i was suicidal and was activly trying to do stuff.. when the staff asked me if i could hear voices i saidd yes. Because i could. A mans and a womans. But they were far away and i couldn't tell what they were saying. I just know it wasn't directions like kill ypurself etc. I told staff at the time it was like radio without the static..

But i think I'm wrong. I think the far awayness and inability to hear exactly what they were saying compares almost exactly to when Anna is far away from me and talking from a distance. So i am thinking those two are also alters. I haven't heard them since 2005. But I'd think their still there.

Has anyone else been diagnosed with psychosis and later discovered it was really alters and thus DID? And does my theory re Anna and the 2 possible year 2005 alters make sense? Any other thoughts?

we cant tell you whether what you were hearing and what was happening in 2005 was psychosis or DID, or even whether it makes sense because one Im not in your location where this happened and two theres a vast difference between psychosis and DID...that difference is the other accompanying symptoms that you had back then, some that you may not even know were symptoms...

for one thing people with DID are the way they are from before the age of 5 when the person first became DID.. that means that every single thing that makes a person DID has been happening since before the age of 5. with DID your sense of reality remains intact. that means you dont lose your sense of whats real and what isnt. you dont just suddenly show psychotic behavior and thoughts.

where as psychosis can happen at any time.. a person can at any time become suicidal, hear voices, have weird thoughts, and lose their sense of reality

my suggestion contact your treatment providers (your doctors and therapists) they can show you in your files why they felt in 2005 you were psychotic and the underlying symptoms that led them to believe that diagnosis.

if you really feel you have DID my suggestion is not to keep trying to figure this out on your own. here in america there are special tests that can diagnose whether a person has a dissociative disorder like DID or not..

its easy to get tested here in america.. all you need to do is tell your therapist you want to be tested. she fills out a paper /or does a referral to your medical doctor and a psychiatrist. then you go through a bunch of tests and then your therapist and psychiatrist will talk with you about your test scores.

trying to second guess whats already been done way back in 2005 is only going to cause you more stress and problems..not only that...its been 8 yrs since 2005, people change, and you are not the same person you were in 2005. so comparing your self to how you were in 2005 in my opinion will only do your self a huge dis-service. its best to stay in the present and deal with today not worry about what if's and coulda, shoulda's form the past. talk with your therapist, she can help you discover whats going on with you now in the present.

[monarch_butterfly]

Well i am working with my T bit this is stuff i have thought about in between sessions. I am ki.d of confused.. i thought this is a place where i can explore such thoughts as long as i don't bring details of abuse in. Which i am not interested in doing.

I am simply thinking outloud. I really do enjoy PC anx feel i fit in. So if i am doing way wrong stuff point me to where it says please. I have read forum guidelines. I did experience trauma and abuse as a young child teen and adult from different people. And since I DO have an alter (a little) this was confirmed by my T who is a trauma psychologist. My mom too. So it seems plossible these voices from 2005 could be alters. I am going to talm to T.

I am not figuring tbis out on my own. From what i read of other posts I'm not using this forum wrong... i am not asking to be dxed.. simply cutious to if people who have simular experiences.
I hope that clarifies my position a little better.

[Claritytoo]

Originally Posted by monarch_butterfly

Well i am working with my T bit this is stuff i have thought about in between sessions. I am ki.d of confused.. i thought this is a place where i can explore such thoughts as long as i don't bring details of abuse in. Which i am not interested in doing.

I am simply thinking outloud. I really do enjoy PC anx feel i fit in. So if i am doing way wrong stuff point me to where it says please. I have read forum guidelines. I did experience trauma and abuse as a young child teen and adult from different people. And since I DO have an alter (a little) this was confirmed by my T who is a trauma psychologist. My mom too. So it seems plossible these voices from 2005 could be alters. I am going to talm to T.

I am not figuring tbis out on my own. From what i read of other posts I'm not using this forum wrong... i am not asking to be dxed.. simply cutious to if people who have simular experiences.
I hope that clarifies my position a little better.

Amandalouise is giving you her professional opinion with suggestion on how to move forward with you thoughts of being DID. She is correct to find a doctor who is willing to ask you questions that will further confirm the diagnosis. And yes this forum is to speak your mind and express you thoughts and feelings. It also allows others to respond. I have not always agreed with responses I have received here but what I found out is the responses cause me to think, they raise questions I had not considered. So keep expressing you thoughts but see if you can keep an open mind to suggestions and not be hurt by someone who may not see what you see. Ultimately the diagnosis will be the result of work with you therapist and you. Take care.

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by monarch_butterfly

Well i am working with my T bit this is stuff i have thought about in between sessions. I am ki.d of confused.. i thought this is a place where i can explore such thoughts as long as i don't bring details of abuse in. Which i am not interested in doing.

I am simply thinking outloud. I really do enjoy PC anx feel i fit in. So if i am doing way wrong stuff point me to where it says please. I have read forum guidelines. I did experience trauma and abuse as a young child teen and adult from different people. And since I DO have an alter (a little) this was confirmed by my T who is a trauma psychologist. My mom too. So it seems plossible these voices from 2005 could be alters. I am going to talm to T.

I am not figuring tbis out on my own. From what i read of other posts I'm not using this forum wrong... i am not asking to be dxed.. simply cutious to if people who have simular experiences.
I hope that clarifies my position a little better.

yes pych central is a place where you can talk about things...you are not doing anything wrong....

maybe what will help you is to know what psych central is for....

everyone gets to post what ever they like and how ever they like...

sometimes that comes in the form of people posting about a problem
sometimes that comes in the form of people replying to a problem.
sometimes that comes in the form of people playing games, telling jokes, discussing general society issues....

it all depends on which forum you are in..

the replies you get from people are going to be things like...

letting you know when someone has gone through the same thing you have/are going through.

letting you know what your problem is called in the person who is replying's location, culture,...

letting you know what the person replying did to fix that problem

letting you know what the treatment providers of the person replying did to help the person replying to you.

letting you know your post has been read

some people are comfortable replying by giving a "hug" or "thanks"

and we can reply by making suggestions, but only you can decide what to do about your problem.

the one thing we do not do here is tell each other what their problems are...and we dont tell each other what another members diagnosis is....

that means we can not tell you things like ....your problem is psychosis... or ...your problem is DID....l or your problem is depression..... we have to leave it up to you to tell us what your problem and diagnosis is...

I cant tell you whether you are psychotic, whether you are DID, whether you have more than one alter... that kinds of stuff.

I can tell you whether what you posted is called psychotic or DID here where I live and work.

I can tell you what the standard requirements for having DID is here in america (the USA)

I can make general suggestions (I cant perform therapy here on Psych central)

I can give you my ....personal....opinion of things you post. Which is what I did. theres a difference between giving a personal opinion (what I think about what you posted) vs giving you a professional opinion (diagnosing the problem and performing my job of being a therapist here)

what I did in my reply to you was my standard way of replying to someone...

I gave you the information that we cant diagnose your problem...

I gave you the information about psychosis and DID, that you would find about DID and psychosis if you had googled those two terms...theres a lot more to those two terms then what you can find online but Im not able to go into those kinds of things because that would be performing my job as a therapist which isnt allowed here.

almost all of my posts contain the suggestion of contacting your own treatment providers for a couple reasons....this website isnt supposed to be a replacement for therapy and what our own doctors, therapists tell us. which is what the disclaimer at the bottom of the page in bold black letters says. and the second because I am a therapist and am open to letting people know that (its in my profile) so I dont want people to misunderstand me and my posts to mean things like I know whats best for them, am trying to perform my job here and other things...the best person to discuss problems is your real time treatment providers...psych central doesnt take the place of that..

if you google the words ...what is psychosis you will find the same information I gave you on that term, and if you google the term what is Dissociative Identity Disorder you will find the same information that is in my post to you on that....

the only difference is that I did not list the whole diagnostic criteria for them...diagnostic criteria is what doctors, psychiatrists look for to see if a person is psychotic or DID.

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by Claritytoo

Amandalouise is giving you her professional opinion with suggestion on how to move forward with you thoughts of being DID. She is correct to find a doctor who is willing to ask you questions that will further confirm the diagnosis. And yes this forum is to speak your mind and express you thoughts and feelings. It also allows others to respond. I have not always agreed with responses I have received here but what I found out is the responses cause me to think, they raise questions I had not considered. So keep expressing you thoughts but see if you can keep an open mind to suggestions and not be hurt by someone who may not see what you see. Ultimately the diagnosis will be the result of work with you therapist and you. Take care.

what I gave in my post was my personal opinion, what things are called here in my location which can be found online, and in the book called the DSM IV TR which is available to the public...and what can be found if someone googled the terms ....psychosis....DID....if I had posted from a professional opinion I would have diagnosed the poster, asked questions that only their treatment provider would have asked, and performed therapy with this poster.and would have stated what my professional opinion of their post was.

[Sabra]

Hey Mon,

It was my experince as I worked through DID, some of the issues I was working on in therapy explained a lot about the past. It felt like connecting the dots of my life.

As far as alters, I didn't have a lot of control on when they showed up. It was important to have safety plans in place early in the process . Their was an internal agenda and I worked with it even when I didn't undertand the plan. Fortunately, I had a good therapist and Pdoc who did understand. It was a long and at times difficult path. However, it was well worth the work.

Let it unfold, your answers will come,

Sabra

[pegasus]

A lot of people are initially misdiagnosed as being schizophrenic rather than DID as DID is so rare. The fact that your T has worked out that this is DID is actually a good thing as now you can work together on this. I know it's confusing but you are making progress. Hugs

[monarch_butterfly]

Thank you everyone! Amanda I am sorry I kind of bit off yor head. I probably should have said in my thread I have experience with the DSM IV TR because of classes i took in college. I have a degree in human development and family studies and taught before i got sick. So i understand how different disorders can be looked at differently in different cultures. And i most certainly would not want you to get in trouble for practicing on PC

I responded defesively and apoligise. After rereading your first post and clarifying posts things made a lot more sense.

And to the others i see too that i may be trying to control this thing i may not be able to control. It is a scary thought. But i am really going to make myself slow down. And see what comes which is of course what my T wants me to do anyway!

[Meisjes]

I was never dx'd with phsycosis of any form but then my therapist didn't tell me everything he thought lol he mostly sat there and nodded his head.....but back to you. I have heard voices - arguing because I would leave the table when my dad & brothers broke into heated discussions that often ended in someone being angry and hurt. I would go to my room and close the door so the voices were muffled and hard to understand but they were angry. I still absorbed them as a memory and later they came back as audio memory. This also happened with music - I would absorb music in order to escape the chaos so much that I would still hear it when there was no radio or player going. I would go to the room I thought it was coming from but it would be quiet in there - no player or radio in the room. Then I'd go back to the previous spot and hear it all over again - go back and check again - a vicious cycle. Once I was able to just let it play and not feel the need to check it didn't happen as often. Now it only happens if I'm fatigued or stressed. It was very annoying when I wasn't in the mood for listening to music. lol