so, I find, often, when I am about to have a breakdown, even a mild one, I get a sensation for a couple of weeks before that its coming. I say a sensation, because its too much to put into a couple of words. Things start splitting alot, I lose time, I lose track of the days of the week/month....

You guys might remember me posting about it last spring. I felt it for a couple weeks before, and it happened. Last time was pretty bad.

Well, I am starting to feel the storm clouds moving in again. Im scared. Im going to tell pdoc at next appointment. I just, dont want to go through last spring again. It was so hard, and painful.

And I feel like I am stuck here just waiting for it to all hit me.

[Rhapsody]

I am SORRY - - - what a scary place this must be for you right now.... and here I was just thinking of how good it would be if my DID was to go full blown again so I could forget, forget it all.... I guess it is true - we need to be careful of what we ask for.

Hang in there and know that I am here for you.... YOU are STRONG / YOU can do it.

LoVe,
Rhapsody - ((( hugs )))

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
Rhapsody said:
I am SORRY - - - what a scary place this must be for you right now.... and here I was just thinking of how good it would be if my DID was to go full blown again so I could forget, forget it all.... I guess it is true - we need to be careful of what we ask for.

Hang in there and know that I am here for you.... YOU are STRONG / YOU can do it.

LoVe,
Rhapsody - ((( hugs )))

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

Thanks Rhap.

I did forget and lose time last time, but then I also had periods involving SI and it was fairly bad. On top of that, I was in what they think now was a mixed episode(I've recently been diagnosed Bipolar 2) so even the times I WAS present, I felt awful.

I can definetly see the attraction to just sinking away into blankness and hiding. But, I find with the way my system works, something always jolts me back.

[January]

(((((((((( Rainbowz ))))))))))))

Can you call and see your pdoc earlier than scheduled? It might be a good idea.

Hugs,

Jan