Trust in wrong people, yet don't trust T

I can't seem to trust T or a part of me doesn't trust her. I go in with all intentions to tell T what is going on, yet I get there and I freeze. It is like I get a mental block.

Yet other people who have proven they are not trustworthy, they come around again and again and I fall their excuses over and over and then get burned.

I am in a bit of a financial bind right now. Part of it is because 2 of my brothers and a friend owe me around $10K in total between the three of them. This is the first time I have added it all up.

These 3 people have promised over and over to pay me back, never do, yet I kept lending them more money. How crazy is that?? It is like a part of me can't say no to men who ask for help, the rescuer in me.

But now these same men, ignore my calls for help. When will I learn

And poor T who has never betrayed my trust, I can't open up to her. I have appt on Monday, have to try to figure out new meds, because current ones are way too expensive

Maybe no one is trustworthy anyway

I can understand why you have a hard time trusting. It took me awhile with my first therapist to really open up. What is it that you are concerned about with your therapist? That you'll be rejected? That she will tell other people about you? Therapists are folks who are known for their caring. You might consider telling your therapist that you just are finding it hard to totally open up right now. Maybe that will sort of break the ice as you see the response.

Some folks are more trustworthy than others. I do think some people can be trusted.

We still struggle with trusting T and have been seeing him for almost 2 years now. We also still test him to make sure he is trust worthy. He seems to know when we are testing him and he understands why we do it.

Can you tell your T that there is still a part that does not trust her fully? Maybe that would be a good way to bring it up and out into the open so you, your T, and your un-trusting part can work on ways to start building that trust.