Checkmate

Inpatient ER. "There's really nothing we can do for you- you need a good therapist- so we're sending you home so you can go find one."
Oh ok. Right. I've not looked at all in the last 14 months. Thank you very much.
Rock bottom

I'm sorry sweety, but it's true, unless you tried to SH. There aren't any actual meds to treat this. There aren't any trauma therapist where you live?

I did SH. not needing stitches... but I've been in an injuring pattern for days now. I'm trying to break it. That particular hosp does "only acute medication management" anyway. If I went to another, it would likely be different.
And I've called at least 50 t's in the past 14 months, seen 10.... white flag. I give. the sw gave me 2 referrals - that aren't on my insurance panel. this is insane.

it sucks big time - all we can do is listen and offer hugs - not much - but here if you need me - wish i could do more

I live on Long Island NY and there is a psych hospital that has an er. My brother was a harm to himself and others. He is bipolar. His friend took him to the psych hospital er and they kept him for a month. They detoxed him from his meds he was on and prescribed different meds. Right now he is doing well. Maybe there is a psych hospital near you that has an er and might be more able to help.

I got shipped to a regular ER, failed a psych eval, and was shipped off to a psych hospital...just because I had cut marks on my arm and blew a .43 BAC.

Oops.

You all ever find that with DID (well, our lives get complicated) while some parts are totally floundering, others are out living lives and stuff? It's like I have windows of opportunity for self care bordering on crisis. and when those windows close, they're closed. I take on too much, try for too much, and "fake" ok.
I even wrote some sort of poem for the creativity section, but I can't post it because I was super honest in it and I was hoping to "code" it in ways to make it for public viewing. But I can't. that's the stuff I don't tell providers - because they would lock me up for a month. and I can't. "I don't have time for that".
You know?
I may need it... my two long stays (18 days and 20 days) in a psych hosp several years ago really didn't do all that good. There' only 2 hospitals here I haven't tried (wards, I mean). But they try to put me on all these meds and I get sicker. It's not like the old days (which in some ways is a really good thing!) where you went in for a long time and you did therapy 3 times a week and really worked on your stuff where you were safe (as possible) and got better. Now it's 'patch you up and send to back to your therapist'.

And I can't be 100% honest with any therapist (who is?) because they'd kick me out. I'd be too much for them. Some things I have to just keep to myself. Like being an orphan and being taken in by good people - I NEED them to see my good side, so they keep me.

I had a window of opportunity this week that I thought about going in and, like a boxer in the corner - get mopped up, watered, coached, and thrown back in the ring- this coming Thursday afternoon- next Tuesday when they could ship me off to my psych nurse. But a friend broke her collarbone and needs help. And my (abusive) grandmother may be dying and we're supposed to maybe see her Friday. Huh- maybe that's a reason there's flare up, eh? Duh. Next month is TOTALLY booked; every day I'm scheduled for something; pt, teaching, caring for my mom who will be having surgery.... it's nuts. Self care? yeah right.
I'm rambling...
thanks for the posts - appreciate them

((((((((( Kiya ))))))))))
(so true, impossible to be completely honest with "them" - very unwise )