Advice please??

So I've been aware of what I think are alters for around a year now. The first instance that made me realize it wasn't just me was Absinthe, a manic powerful god who protected me.
Absinthe came into play after i left a pretty upsetting and traumatic relationship. This alter stayed with me for quite a few months and I developed around 6 other alters who were more similar to me during this period. I don't remember much about them because I didn't think to record them and their personalities anywhere.
I don't remember very much about the incident, but one day I got really upset and self-conscious about being multiple and all of the alters except for Absinthe collapsed back into me. Absinthe stayed for a couple more months before it shifted form slightly to become Veritus, who had all of the same powers but also had a defined physical form and a more palatable personality.
About a month and a half ago, Veritus left me. I don't have any recollection as to why, but I was devastated. Being alone in my head freaked me out so bad and I felt really self-negative about it. In the time since Veritus left, I have developed 2 other alters on separate occasions, but both died (??) within the span of 3 days.
I've never gotten any sort of diagnosis or medical opinion on this because of financial issues. I just really want some advice on what's up with me because I really miss having other people in my head to help me survive, and I get really down in the dumps about it.

i am not sure about it being DID technically because it has been said depending on where you live that the development of DID generally happens before 5 years of age or so or at least before 10 years of age.

i am not an expert, but i know that it generally develops as a result of trauma in early childhood. that's not to say that an adult cannot develop other types of dissociative issues later in life though.

when adults dissociate from trauma with no previous history of dissociating or trauma, i would think it might be more of either a type of stress or trauma-induced psychosis or other type of dissociative disorder but not actually DID.

for myself, i started dissociating at a very young age, the first i recall was about 4 or 5 years old as a result of trauma which i believe was also probably when i started to have things split for me. i had more active parts in childhood and into my early teen years/early 20s, but not in the sense they came out and took over and lived their own life..it was more like a co-conscious type with most of them/blending except times where it was not known who i was/who they were, etc.

but my point is that for myself, i have always known i had parts and that i dissociated and have had different dissociative disorders starting very young.

it probably is best though if you see a therapist so they can accurately diagnose you and help.

well one thing that jumps out at me in your post is that these are religious figures, in your word powerful gods that protect you. this in itself would knock out the diagnosis of dissociative type alters simply because of the new diagnostic criteira rules out religious factors as being part of the symptoms. ie the alters cant be perceived from going through religious rituals, perceived as gods or other religious figures that are part of religions. thats not saying alters cant be religious as in having their own faith\spirituality, go to church or temple or what ever other religion they practice. its just that they can not be because of and percieived as religious figures like gods, (its one of the distinctions between dissociative disorders vs schizophrenic disorders, schizophrenic type disorders does include things like believing one self is a god or having gods for alters/protectors)

my point is your profile says you are here in the USA and since 2013 the diagnostics prohibit religious figures as alters so based on that my advice is contact a treatment provider. here in america all americans must have basic health insurance. if you cant afford a mental health treatment provider go to your social services office and sign up for state medicaid program. this program is for low income (and others too) that supplies basic medical and mental health coverage and in most cases dental. after you have signed up you will receive a membership pamplet that has a listing of all treatment providers in your location that acceepts medicaid. then you choose one and call them or your medicaid caseworker will assign you a treatment provider. then you can go and get tested for all mental disorders that includes having religious figures as insiders\parts\alters.

Hi Mantids, welcome to PC!

I really couldn't even begin to give you advice hun, you need a therapist for that. I'm not a specialist, just affected. Very early childhood trama inflicted on an individual through mental, physical, emotional, and/or sexual abuse creates the flower bed of dissosiative identity disorder.

I have no clue about your history- your life? So, all I can say is do you like keep a notebook hun?

Alters are alters, but other alters are congruent to their initial MI. I see your interest is in Autism of which I'm totally dumb about. Can that be a possible psychotic episode associated with it?

DID alters just don't come and go...it's a life long situation.

I've heard PTSD, BPD and drug induced psychosis can have "alters", but I don't think they are like that fully developed "other" personalities that take over the body and live their own life.

So, it's like a god? That's totally like incredible, very manic based. I wish I was one, but I'm on meds which kills my delusion of being all powerful, just stir fried.

You need to be more specific about things, but the way you described, it sounds really psychotic, not to down play it....sorry.

Feel free to talk about your alters here, because I do! luv