questions: dissociative disorders version

Ended a 12 year eating long disorder. We had bulimia, badly. Pretty much every time we ate it was a binge / purge cycle. Towards the end we realized it was keeping an inside one continually reliving her particular trauma and that each time we purged was like raping her all over again. We stopped.

What is the biggest thing another person has knowingly done for one of your alters?

Not only have I come up with another question - I don't even know the answer to your question but I'm going to have fun thinking about it. BUT! I couldn't wait any more to say how awesome that was what you did (can you catch the change in my syntax...is a little in there who just jacked the sentence I started. ) for her. Yay!

My therapist had a childrens birthday party for them.

do you know how many are in your system?

A long time ago some friends who have did gave us a birthday party too. They made a rabbit cake on green coconut grass!!! it was the best. I am glad you had a birthday party too.

We don't know how many. We used to know more but then everything got mixed up and now we don't know so much and some of us is all shut off. but there are lots.

do your littles ever want to grow up?

no.

what is 1 of the biggist issues you face

Ouch.

The current reality.

What is the biggest hurdle you have overcome so far?

mine would be not comunicating with my family anymore, and accepting that they are bad. i let them back in my life once... huge mistake.

what would you say is your goal for 2016

Understand what is wrong with me and get to do some real work making it better.

Do you struggle with parts of yourself not wanting or allowing yourself to do things to feel better. Even coping skills like meditation, distractions, calming exercises, etc.... because you shouldn't feel better?

yes at times.

do you have any parts of you that can't accept they are in a body?

(like i have a part of me who believes she lives in manchester, not part of us)

No to that question for us. As long as you make sure T understands that is the interworks of your organizational inner worl . At times I refer to mine the same way. The environment can be states I'm not a one town system, that doesn't mean for this system there is no overlapping of states if you know what I mean.

I've had people insinuating I should only be in my current town alters at all times if a switch. Not true or possible

you forgot to ask a question.

so, i'll ask again

what has been 1 major positive of the week for you

I told T3 that I actually think that I may recover from DID. I have been in therapy for 9 years and am finally starting to think that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. My challenge now is to work with the adults who are lacing up their running shoes to get to the light and the youngest who have too short of legs to keep up.

What kind of pet do you have?

Yay for you! I think I am nearing the end of the race too. I have done around the same number of laps as you (9 ish) and I know now there is an endpoint. I feel like I need lots of protective gear for the next leg of the race, but bring it on!

I have two cats and lots of pet hates.

How do you feel about having a dissociative disorder?

it's just the icing on the cake really

with how bad our life is and how many problems we actually have, are we really surprised?

no.... probably not.

do you have any plans for the future?

I don't know if you mean in general or as it relates to dissociation but here goes...

Yes! I am getting a bunny! We are moving to a piece of property and building a house and when we settle in the little one is getting a bunny...and it's about all she can talk about now.

Do you find anything positive about having a dissociative disorder?

I was not going to question at the moment wasn't forgotten just so you know....

Positives ;I have Dissociative identity Disorder, by the way.....The positive although wasn't my reason for entering therapy knowing our truth knowing myself. How what preceded therapy all made sense the anxiety not allowing switches of those who could the debilitating anxiety speaking of. Yes, the education of it all helped me find our selves. It's good when you don't have to be alone despite problem marriage my reason for entering therapy. Our great talks inside! If on the same page and not so dang on trying to be creative and inconspicuous the clairvoyance does help avoid bad people and triggers and situation that aren't conductive for us..

How much do you enjoy the research? Do you think it is a waste of time to read it all? Is your therapist's engaging on this part or are they too busy trying to put themselves in your shoes on what you MIGHT be experiencing or feeling bad about?

the research part of anything never interests me that much, and i have to say it's the same in regards to this

i honestly think a lot of it has to do with not actually retaining the information- and having such a poor memory
i could read 500 pages of stuff and remember like 1 line.

what's been the hardest thing you've had to tell your therapist.

(or if you can't say the hardest, 1 of the hardest)

that our mom tried to burn down our house

how has 2016 been for you as a whole

Really awful. In so many different big and overwhelming ways.

Are you kind to yourself/selves?

certainly not!

but we should be and we know that

is it difficult for you to focus on the daily positives?

Answer and question all rolled into one.

Daily positives?

if i can still maintain a sense of humor about all the craziness that can go on each and every day

if you have a pet, do you think he/she/they are sensitive to your different alters/parts/insiders?

yes, most definitely. They know to hide from some.

If you have children are they aware of your dissociative disorder? Either consciously or unconsciously?

i'm sure you must have 1 or 2?

((((hugs)))))

anyway: no children here

when was your last really good day?

i don't know.

certainly not this year (and probably not last year either)

do some of your insiders really like to swear (and you're a calm person?)