support

thanks amanda, for taking the time to write your comments

im trying to go into this with a clear and open mind... but i want to tell them what im feeling and afraid of too... like afraid i have a dissociative disorder...

i dont want to play them, want them to know who i am and what i am... like... i am a nerd sometimes and i read a lot so i have a higher understanding of some things than others maybe... its important to talk to me the proper way... because i pick up every mistake it seems like... and its difficult for me to trust someone that making lots of mistakes with what they saying....

i dunno if that makes sense; i just mean... some people try to play you in order to get information out of you... and it really bothers me when people do that because im not stupid and can see what you are trying to figure out so why not just ask me straight outright...?
or when they lie because they are unable to recall something or accidentally mix up patients...

i just wanna be myself... go and be myself... but i dunno if its going to work because the last time i was in the hospital i just panicked and took on a role to get myself out of there... like... i was fine, ok, and everything was good, but things were really bad it was just that i was so triggered that i needed to get out so bad that i became something else... i dont remember much about it... besides nightmares, i always have nightmares and i tried to tell them about the nightmares but they couldnt help them either....

im done rambling, dunno what i wanted to say... sorry...

i just wanted to say that i wasnt talking about anyone on psych central, you guys rock,, <3

wish i wasn't so nervous though :x

You probably should.And maybe it might help to make a list of all your concerns,questions,etc and take it with you so you don't forget or in case you go into "I'm fine and doing ok" mode.

im getting so scared... panic attack is coming on at this rate

You are brave and I'm sending you courage to be "you" and voice what have experienced and struggled with. A written list is a great idea!

I truly hope that it is a place for you to find answers. Answers always makes me feel better. Understanding instead of confusion.

((( encouraging hug )))

i appreciate it,

will they give me my klonopin back in there?
im going to need something to keep me calm...
not that im like violent or whatever, just really really anxious...

I doubt they will give you klonopin,being a rehab,but you never know.

(I have a son in rehab right now, he has been there for the past 4 or 5 weeks and has about 4 to 6 more weeks to go,depending on whether he cooperates and progresses,if not it could be longer,so he's really trying.It's not his first time,it's one of many through the years.It seems like each time he learns a little more,makes a little more progress,and I hope and pray some day he will be able to stay clean and sober)

He is on medication but it's what they felt he needs to be on,he's not getting Xanax or Klonopin,but he is receiving sleep meds and something for anxiety,can't think of what it's called right now,but it's not a benzo.

I'm sure if they feel you need to be medicated they will give you something.They usually know what they're doing.You may not get what you're currently taking though.

thanks for all the support
im so tired, so nervous, but gonna still try to make myself go..

i didnt sleep at all, couldnt sleep... now im feeling a bit sick already; guess its just my nerves..

i keep feeling like im gonna blackout

i hate feeling like this...