Something new Trigger Warning (potty talk)

I know I should ask my treatment providers things but I like other people's opinions as well.

So I was diagnosed DDNOS in 2003 and DID in the last 3 months. I believe I am OSDD. Anyway, over the last couple of weeks I have been having some things happen that didn't used to. Examples:

1) I wanted to trace the letter 2 on the desk calendar just because I was bored. All of the sudden my thoughts had a childlike tone. The thoughts said you trace like this baby and I finished tracing. Then I was like what was that even though I was completely aware of what I was doing.

2) Last night I had to go to the bathroom. I walked to the bathroom but then again the childlike thought said you go pee pee like this as I used the bathroom. Again completely aware of what was going on. Realized that was odd and that was the end of it.

3) I was in bed. I had the childlike thought pop up as I was rubbing my stomach ( sounds like a thought but babyish) Rub your belly like this little baby. Then I realized I was being weird then stopped.

I am aware of what I am doing but I am not doing it on purpose. Does that make sense? There is some kind of disconnect like I'm there but someone else is guiding.

I noticed I have these type thoughts and behaviors mainly after I have been thinking about DID. Like if I'm thinking about what my counselor said about something or what book I needed to get for therapy etc.

Anyone know what could be happening?

Im sorry we cant tell you what is happening in your body and why you behaved that way when you needed to go to the bathroom. my suggestion is print off your post and take it to your next appointment with your therapist they will be able to help you to find out what this is in you.

What do you think could be happening?

Not sure because I'm new to all of this. I dont remember why I went to my psychologist in 2003 and how I ended up diagnosed DDNOS. I've only been diagnosed DID for 3 months.

maybe a new alter (a child alter) is trying to make themselves known by trying to do those things

or do you have a child alter all ready who is maybe trying to talk to you

Not sure, thought I did have alot of child alters but now I'm not so sure. Alot of names are mentioned in the chatter. None of them have really sounded child like until now. They all just usually sound the same or just have emotions.

Oh my gosh, yes - this happens to me frequently: "I am aware of what I am doing but I am not doing it on purpose. Does that make sense? There is some kind of disconnect like I'm there but someone else is guiding."

To me, it is simply an aspect of a dissociative identity disorder. What I tell myself now (when it happens) is not to dwell on it, but to bring it up in therapy. If I dwell on, everything gets louder and more chaotic.

Thank you for your reply. I get that too, the it gets more chaotic part. I never understood why that was though. Still dont really. The more I focus on my alters the more often they chatter in my head. I read some videos about schizophrenia and DID. They schizophrenia voices go away when not thought about and DID voices always stay. So it has just always added to the fear that I have schizophrenia.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dnester Thank you for your reply. I get that too, the it gets more chaotic part. I never understood why that was though. Still dont really. The more I focus on my alters the more often they chatter in my head. I read some videos about schizophrenia and DID. They schizophrenia voices go away when not thought about and DID voices always stay. So it has just always added to the fear that I have schizophrenia.

Well, I definitely have bipolar disorder, was dx'ed decades ago and it fits like a glove. Yet, I have read or watched videos that describe BD and they are so off the mark or non-inclusive. What I'm trying to say is, try to take anything you read or watch with a whole shaker of salt. As we say a lot on mental health forums, "everyone is different."