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  #1  
Old Feb 05, 2008, 07:40 PM
freewill
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DID.... those... three little letters... aren't they....

How do you explain... to someone... what they really mean...

the physicians... the dentists... the health care providers...friends.. family.. people you meet on the street... and people you meet in the store....

Please let me have my feelings
*************************************************************************

For me... and I speak.. for me alone...

I have a "stamp".... on me.. it is invisible... to me.. but not others..

It says................. Unloveable..............................

And... no matter... how hard I try... no matter.. how much I scrub.. no matter.. what...

In the end... there it is.. the stamp

unloveable...

forever and a day.......................... unloveable.......

I didn't "choose" to be DID... though.. I did.... because... my tiny little body and mind wanted to live...but.. I wonder.. really wonder.. if way back then.. if I would have made the same choice... if perhaps.. if I know.. then.. what I know now...that it would leave me with a

forever and a day stamp... of unloveable...
would I have choosen.. differently??? yes.. I believe I would have...

I had... an extremely trying day.... packed on by more... with the rest of the trying days lately....

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  #2  
Old Feb 05, 2008, 09:17 PM
Pita Pita is offline
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Member Since: May 2007
Location: Southwest, U.S.
Posts: 211
Freewill -
You are absolutely not unlovable! You need to just let that notion go because it is not true. You are lovable and kind and compassionate and smart and funny. Even after all that you have going on in your life you still always take the time to respond and to be supportive and helpful and loving to everyone here. Please know that you are lovable - please also love yourself and let yourself see all the good things that you do.

Gentle hugs to you!
  #3  
Old Feb 06, 2008, 01:18 AM
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bipolar_bear bipolar_bear is offline
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Member Since: Aug 2005
Posts: 8,106
You are not unloveable. I am sorry you see yourself that way. I understand how the DID can make you see yourself that way at times though. I hope you can hear me even if a little how loveable you really are. Know I am here.

BB
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extremely trriggering...


  #4  
Old Feb 06, 2008, 04:34 AM
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sabby sabby is offline
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Member Since: Feb 2005
Location: Southwest of Northeast
Posts: 33,346
(((((((((((( freewill ))))))))))))))

This extremely trriggering... shows you that you are loveable and loved for that matter!

extremely trriggering...
sabby
  #5  
Old Feb 06, 2008, 06:16 PM
Anonymous81711
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extremely trriggering... extremely trriggering... extremely trriggering... extremely trriggering... extremely trriggering... extremely trriggering... extremely trriggering... extremely trriggering...
  #6  
Old Feb 06, 2008, 07:31 PM
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Shellbe Shellbe is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2007
Posts: 31
freewill,

i am struggling with all of the same. I can't say if I knew then what i knew now, I would choose life. I know that is depression, and hurt, anger, despair, hopelessness, and feeling lost......
I don't know what to say except you are loveable just because you ARE. There is no way around it. You did not deserve the bad or the trauma.

No matter what they taught you, what you learned, whatever negative you feel.....it was not your fault.

my head is like a rubix cube. i know your pain and i'm so sorry you are feeling this way right now. Remember, as I often forget, these are just feelings.
I wish you some peace and comfort.
TC, Shellbe
  #7  
Old Feb 07, 2008, 10:00 PM
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Kiya Kiya is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2007
Location: Out of my mind...back in 5 min.
Posts: 10,370
(((((((((((((((free))))))))))))))))))))) you're in the cycle... this too shall pass. kiya
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