[wanttoheal]

I was reading Zorah's message and she triggered something in my head (not always a bad thing). So many of us here have become family.

I am visiting a family this week a million miles away and while they are not my flesh and blood, they mean more "family" to me than my real family. In the beginning, I was scared. Just of so many things: being safe, being accepted, being hurt, being rejected. Every time I turned around, I was ready to dart away. But I was accepted and I was safe, even the times I didn't feel like it.

Because of my life, I really am a scaredy cat. And at the hint of new, different, mean, etc, I run and hide. It's what I do, what I am best at (outside of whining... I'm am actually up for an award for that lol ).

I've been here since 2004. I am a hit and run poster. But even though I don't post a lot, you guys have become a kind of family here. I don't have any support in real life, outside of my T (this family I am with right now lives several states away). I understand the people who don't post and I love reading the posts of people who do.

I know so many of us don't feel safe right now and it's very understandable. But for some of us, like me, you all are all I have. I know so many are contemplating leaving. I contemplate it too and have since I got here because I'm always so afraid.

But, like the family I am visiting right now, you guys make me feel accepted. And while I don't always feel safe, I do feel the support.

I can't post personal stuff much. It has always been too scary. But, I have learned things like how to play a game online. I have listened to the voices in my head get so excited when I click on something Petunia has posted to have fun. I sometimes read posts that I don't even remember making. I find pages open for dress up dolls and coloring pages and I wonder when I did those. I wasn't able to do that in the beginning. I didn't even understand it. I couldn't figure out why people did those things. I didn't know how to have fun is what it boiled down to.

So much here has made my healing progress in ways I would not have dreamed. I know it's hard. I know we don't feel safe. But you guys really are a family I don't have. I know many have already left and more are pretty much decided. I hope you guys will stay. I understand not posting for a while until you stay safe again. But, it's really hard to lose people that have become a positive thing. I for one don't have a lot of positive. I hope that you guys will stay. Even if you don't post, or even if you can't post personal stuff. I would really miss that support if you leave.

[biplol]

((((Wanto heal))) What a beautiful post, I really feel like you and thansk so much for bringing good things up
~hugs~

they are going to have to kick me of the site before i leave of my own free will, sure there are ups and downs, this is not the first time this has happened on this forum, and it wont be the last, right now a lot of people are feeling the downs more than the ups but it will get better.

i guess what i am trying to say is we have all been threw a lot worse than this, weather the storm it will soon calm back down again.

[nothemama8]

this is an awesome post, the compassion coming from everyone is making me tingle, I just got on after making 8 loaves of Turkey stuffing bread, I'm hot, tired, and FLOURED, (wonder if Pet will have a good come back for this), this makes my day
Angie

[LMo]

[oksomaybeimnuts]

a truly beuatiful post from a truly beautiful person
{{{{{{{{{wanttoheal}}}}}}}}

[pegasus]

((((((((((( wanttoheal )))))))))))))

[(JD)]

(((hugs wth))))

[Fuzzybear]

(((((((((((((( wanttoheal ))))))))))))))

[Zorah]

{{{{{{{{{{wanttoheal}}}}}}}}}}

awesome post, just what we were trying to say

[Mahali]

(((((( Wanttoheal)))))) You have come so far. Your caring and compassion never cease to amaze me.

You are awesome.

[bipolar_bear]

(((((((((((((((((((wanttoheal))))))))))))))))))))) I hope you can see what a great, kind person you are. I hope you are having a great weekend yourself.

[Evangelista]

{{{{{{{Wantto}}}}}}}}



Eva

Wanttoheal--

Your post touched my heart.

This should be bumped up from time to time, so everyone can remember why we're all here to help one another.

It's really quite simple.

[Mahali]

Isn't it awesome??!!! It says it all.

[wanttoheal]

Thank you guys so much for your responses. When I hit the submit button with this post, I completely freaked out because I felt maybe I had said too much. You guys are so awesome. I'm so glad you are all here still here.

[Zorah]

bump

(((((PC family)))))

Ooooh I totally missed this post!!!

How Wonderful, And How Exactly Like I Feel.

((((Wants))))

((((PC Family))))

[nothemama8]

{{{{{{{{{{{{our family }}}}}}}}}}

[Jennifer1084]

I totally missed this post too because during that time I was taking a break because I needed to figure out some things for myself. I did come back and check every once in awhile, but never saw this. I was about in tears just now. I had no clue that there had been problems going on, I had been gone for so long and well I am back now. I am completely able to relate to it all. I am so gald that we all have eachother to learn from, listen to and laugh about what you post. I missed all of you guys when I was gone for those months and I am sorry I had left for so long and the way I did.

Jennifer

P.S. You guys are awesome, all of you, down to the last drop (or member I mean) lol

[allthegirls6]

(((((((((((((((((((((((wantto))))))))))))))))))))))))))

[Zorah]

{{{{{{{{{{everyone}}}}}}}}}}

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
We are one, but we are many, & from all the lands on earth we come

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

love to our family at PC, our only family,

[wanttoheal]

Wow, I had forgotten about this post. Thanks everyone. We're a pretty cool group, eh?