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#1
Sep 17, 2008, 12:01 AM
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Saw T today..........made things worse like it usually does..........but the argue in my head will not stop no matter what we do..............tried drawing in journal..........tried writing in journal...............tried doing some beadwork which we failed at big time ( this is what usually helps most)!!!!!!!!!!!!
Cant concentrate on anything...........alters have argues about everything i've tried to do today just keep telling me how 'i'm not doing it right'. Completely frustrated. Only good thing i see in all of this is that when we go back to see T he can't yell at me again for not putting anything in the journal -there is at least some stuff in it now. Searching for peace and can't seem to find it Beadlady29 |
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#2
Sep 17, 2008, 11:14 AM
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Beadlady,
It sounds very frustrating for you. I sympathize. Sometimes things get very jumbled inside of me. The more I kept going to T and working with myself the better/clearer things got inside. I'm glad you did your journal. Be kind to yourself and it will help make things a bit calmer. Hugs, Leslie and the Pixies
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  HEALING HAPPENS
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#3
Sep 17, 2008, 11:48 AM
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((((((((( beadlady ))))))))
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That's why it's such a serious thing to ask a Centaur to stay for the weekend. A very serious thing indeed. - The Silver Chair |
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#4
Sep 17, 2008, 11:55 AM
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((((((((((((( beadlady ))))))))))))))
 
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#5
Sep 17, 2008, 04:21 PM
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Quote:
 have to see T again tomorrow we are scaredbead appreciates everyone here at pc so much beadlady29
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#6
Sep 17, 2008, 04:26 PM
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Quote:
 beadlady29
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#7
Sep 17, 2008, 04:32 PM
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bead thanks u so much for ur support........ it is so wonderful to have a safe place where her can just be beadlady29 |
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#8
Sep 17, 2008, 05:03 PM
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(((((((((Beadlady)))))))))
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#9
Sep 17, 2008, 06:11 PM
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(((((((((( beadlady ))))))))))
I know how frustrating those conflicts can be, good luck with T tomorrow in sharing.
__________________
 Pegasus Got a quick question related to mental health or a treatment? Ask it here General Q&A Forum “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by it's ability to climb a tree, it will live it's whole life believing that it is stupid.” - Albert Einstein |
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#10
Sep 17, 2008, 07:38 PM
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((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Silversparrow))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! beadlady29 |
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#11
Sep 17, 2008, 08:21 PM
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(((((((((((((((((((((((( bead ))))))))))))))))))))))))))
I thought I replied to this earlier, but I don't see a reply here. Hum!!!!! I'm sorry it's so hard right now. Sending many many
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#12
Sep 17, 2008, 09:18 PM
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Thanks for ur support.....baed appreciates it very much and is trying to get thru this......... right now seem like hardest thing we ever did before beadlady29 |
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#13
Sep 18, 2008, 08:38 AM
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A Centaur is a mythical creature, half man, half horse, in Greek mythology. Other writers have borrowed them as well though. They are mentioned in the Harry Potter series of books and in the Narnia series by C.S. Lewis, which is where I got the quote from. Here are a couple of pictures of somebody's design of one:  
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That's why it's such a serious thing to ask a Centaur to stay for the weekend. A very serious thing indeed. - The Silver Chair |
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#14
Sep 18, 2008, 05:11 PM
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(((((BeadLady)))))
How did your time with T go? Was T able to help or maybe calm things down inside of your system? I hope it is getting better. Lots of Gentle Hugs being sent your way! Leslie and Her Pixies     
__________________
HEALING HAPPENS
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#15
Sep 18, 2008, 09:46 PM
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had goodest session with T today that have ever had ( this is T new only been seeing about 2 months) adn bead realized that she can trust him, that he wants to help her, adn that he knows what he is doing gooder then anyone ever seed before ( just like old T told us but we was not sure if could beleive).T also did logn guided imagery today with bead adn he help her make a safe place to go it is a yellow house that we start to maek.it hepl baed adn everyone calm down suzanne even stpo crying! Have bad conflict hear because bfreind wants to move to arkansas! so like bead tried to tell him cannot leave anohter T especaily when finlay found one that can and will hepl. he did not acknowledge that we even said anything Then we lost a bunch of time - like that was this monring at 9:30 am and now its 9:30 pm bf did not say much to us that gave us clue what was done or who was out but hes did say somethign to baed - "while u were dozign on the couch i wetn in ur yellow house". Apparently we falled asleep sittign up again for about 20minutes he told us. This is EXACTLY the type of thign we worry about y bead never even feel safe to go to sleep( learned when little that she had to stay on gurard all the time especially at nite and is still that way not know how to be any other way). how dare he go into my safe place wehn i are not there!!!!!!!!!!!Now we i geuss are gonna have to wait until see T agian adn make a hole new house. we really like the one we started tho and he invaded it!!! so like things are not calm any more inside our sysetm like they was when we left T (imao that). It is helping just to get this out even if we are kinda embarassed. rite now pc is bead's only safe place again. very thanks ful are here. thanks evryone for their support!! beadlady29 |
 multipixie9
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#16
Sep 18, 2008, 10:11 PM
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((((((((((((((((((((((bead)))))))))))))))))))))))
Awww, I'm sorry your safe, yellow house was invaded Your T sounds so great though - I bet he will help you make an even better house next week!!
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#17
Sep 19, 2008, 02:06 AM
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aaw bead, ur t sowns reely good an nis an safe. i don lik that person who wen to u safe plas an wen inside. How he can do that. It is u hows not him hows. mabee u can mak protektors for prity yelow hows.
if u needs him i bet u can call t. T wil help. He wil help mak a good saf hows. i think bf preten to go to yelo hows, cos how he can get ther fru u mind??? I think he be in a fink, a ratfink to tees u bout goin to yelo hows. peepl who luvs us don do meen stuff. Tha sposd to care bout us an do wat is gud for us. u boifren dos meen stuff to u, he ratfink, wi u let him bees meen to u??? I don lik way he talk u. He cant get into yelo hows an he sed that on purpus to be meen!!!! It not rit!!! Rachel an spunky pixies - nobudee shud be meen to owr frens!!! Maks us mad!!!
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HEALING HAPPENS
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#18
Sep 19, 2008, 06:23 AM
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(((((((((( beadlady ))))))))) What a horrible thing for your bf to say . I'm really sorry he upset you like that. I agree with multipixie though, how did he know how to find the house? Yes it is in your mind, but you described it very well in chat last night and surely he wouldn't have known the house in such detail? Maybe you mentioned something about your T creating a safe yellow house for you and that is how he knew about it? He can't have got in if he didn't know exactly what it was like. It could have been any yellow house, not yours.
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That's why it's such a serious thing to ask a Centaur to stay for the weekend. A very serious thing indeed. - The Silver Chair |
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#19
Sep 19, 2008, 06:52 AM
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(((((((((((((((beadlady)))))))))))) I'm so sorry your safe place feels not safe anymore. It's way awesome though that new T is safe and understands and wants to help. Take gentle care of selves bead. We care about you.
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#20
Sep 19, 2008, 08:24 AM
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Bead says thank you for beign so understanding..Thanks to all of you! multipixies, Silver_Queen adn wantstoheal Bead thinkns ye all are rite - bf acan be very mean.He can aslo be veyr nice when he watns to be we are so confuse about this! Also is so glad to hear that maybe bf cant really get into our safe yellow house because it is in our head NOT his! Porcelain_Doll, BehindtheMoon and nightbird adn saraxxchristine( and whoever esle help bead last nite dont remember sorry)we wants to say thank you to you aslo because u hepl bead make new saef hoouse wiht locks on the doors that bf cant get itno last nite. we was so stress last nite adn ye all reakky hepl us calm down!!!!! Fuzzybear adn whoever else hepl mary th other nite baed dont remember a thign but watns to extedn heartfel thanks to ye all aslo!! Christina86 we was albe to do do one of the exercises u sedn bead to some extent last nite after thry hepl us make new house.thakn you very mchu. Zorah we send u our best adn worry baout u. We r going thru very hard time rite now with sureegeries coming up adn all aslo and in so much pain...... so many of ye all are aslo going thru rough patches adn u have taken the time adn effort to help us (WOW SO COOL) we wants u to know that we cares about evyreone at pc adn that hopefully we all help each other get thru suhc hadr times both now adn in the future i dunno if we posted all of this in rite place or not hope is ok. We are tryign to laern how to be getnle with our selfs also sefl awaereness adn relax is hadr when never done this before. beadlady29 (collectively) loves evryone at pc beadlady29 |
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#21
Sep 19, 2008, 08:33 AM
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Bead sends you hugs adn tells u we cares about u 2!
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#22
Sep 20, 2008, 09:39 AM
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(((((((((((((((((((((((((((bead))))))))))))))))))))) Know I care and I am here. I am so glad you got support from everyone in chat. You are cared for.
BB
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#23
Sep 20, 2008, 01:07 PM
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(((beadlady))) - PC will always be your safe place no matter what! take care
__________________
花鳥風月
c'est tout ce que j'aime |
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#24
Sep 20, 2008, 08:23 PM
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so happy we find pc becuase it is saef palaec to jtus be. beadlady29 |
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