can't think of a title

i'm sorry i don't come around here very much. i don't know how many people here know me. i don't check on pc as often or this corner of the forums.

things have been improving slowly lately, which is very nice for a change. some good progress had been made with one little. i've realized how a lot of the pack, our system, seems to prefer expressing themselves through art rather than words. someone drew a really nice picture of the pack that i thought about maybe sharing. i got engaged too.

anyways, there's a question somewhere in this, just not all to sure on how to phrase it. i have a lot of trouble still grasping and understanding that we're supposed to be unified in a way. there's us and we, but then there's me. sometimes i feel like we're all one entity, but at the same time, it's like we're a pack of animals, all different but banded together.

i struggle a lot still with trying to accept it and accept alters. sometimes it feels really weird talking about it because if i refer to something another did, it's weird if i say he, or if i use their name, because it's me? it feels like i skipped over the whole 'understanding' thing and i've gone to work trying to cope, but i'm coping with something that is hazy and confusing.

i try to grasp and understand it but things always slip away i always think to myself that people never understand, and now i realize i don't understand too well myself.

well there was supposed to be a question somewhere in there but i think i lost my own point. it's as if only now i've started to accept this and i thought i was on my way to understanding it. now i'm just muddled up and confused.

((((((( Griffe))))))) and all of you, it's good to see you, and it's good to hear you are making progress. Engaged too! Woohoo!

Yes, younger parts will find it easier to draw, words tend to be a bit blunt in my opinion, let them express it.

Accepting alters, oh, well that can take a while, one minute we know, the next minute we don't, in and out of denial but keep plodding away, you'll get there.

Griffe, I am soooooooooooooooooooooooooooo excited that you have made some improvement. I am really, really happy for you!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Getting better is all about understanding yourself. I never had DID but I had to understand myself to heal from my anxiety. You will get there Griffe, just keep on working.

Hey, did I tell you how happy I am that you have made some improvement?

thanks.

some improvement is certainly better then being completely stuck in reverse. at least now i know what i need to work on and i'm plodding forward slowly. it's really frustrating, i feel like i should be getting 'better' faster.

had a long day, new approaches are being tried out and new ways of doing things, it's hard to adjust to change and i'm trying not to let the negatives and the unknowns spoil what progress i've made. never good to dwell on the bad i suppose. trying to keep myself occupied with what i've done right, though at times it just feels like i'm trying to deny all this messed up stuff i don't get there's a lot of stuff about DID that i always want to ask my therapist but i'm too shy or scared to and i'm never good at piecing things together myself. i piece it together all wrong.

probably didn't make any sense again but long day. just trying to keep reminding myself of the good instead of the bad.

Griffe,

Nice to meet you.

Congratulations on your engagement.

It isn't easy dealing with alters at the best of times but trying to get other people to understand is even more of a problem. I find it best to 'act' as one person where other people are concerned, and I choose to keep my 'creative extra mental activity' to myself. Some may view this as the cowards way out but I think we should each do what works for us.

It took me years to get a proper understanding of this stuff. It's something we must work at if we want answers. We are very fortunate today because of the net and all the information out there. What I found helpful was reading about how other people dealt with things.

Improvement and progress no matter how small is always a good thing. I don't think it's a good thing to push things faster than they are meant to go, we might just have to deal with it again. Allow your healing to unfold at it's own pace and in the meantime take care of yourself and look to the future.

As for change. Telling ourselves that change is always for the better helps us to accept it.

Making a list of your progress and not your failings helps too. Avoid making lists of the negative stuff, I believe this just re-enforces it.

Not thinking about the negative stuff is not denying it, it is still working itself out in your subconscious mind. Sometimes we can hinder this process by dwelling on the negative too much.

Negative things are not back they simply remind us of what we are dealing with and why we are doing the things we do in order to heal.

Writing things down for your T might help.

Stay strong and stay above the battles.

Griffe all of it made sense! I think that you are doing good work!

Either you get better slowly or you let the frustration paralyze you......

You can only work on one thing at a time. Taking one thing at a time to work on is not denying all the other stuff!

I do hope you will ask your therapist some of these questions that you have!

Griffe, I am so happy that you are moving forward!

Happy to meet you.

When I first came on PC I think I saw your name and at that time I just didn't know what to type or say.

But I am so glad for you that you have come so far. I am really seeing a big step forward from what I can remember in the confusion of my first few weeks here (still not that clear but getting there).

Congrats on your upcoming wedding and all the best into the future!

Ice

((((((((((((((( Griffe ))))))))))))))))