She is missing

Hi Manda...

Often times I don't realize right when I switch. Usually it takes me a bit to notice that my behavior or thinking, or even the sound of my voice in my head has changed.

There are some people who DON'T know when they switch too. So it could be possible that you have been and not noticing it. Has your husband noticed you switching at all lately?

I also had a kind of observation to run by you too. I have been reading your posts and I remember a couple weeks ago (I think) you wrote a post saying that your husband told his brother about Li'l Manda....? Li'l Manda was pretty upset by this. Do you feel it is possible that this scared her...being outed to others...and she did go into hiding. Most alters are all about protection and safety and if she felt too vulnerable after being outed she could have gone deep in hibernation. Just a thought.

Just keep talking to her inside of you. Maybe read her some stories and let her watch some cartoons. Keep letting her know that she is safe, and hopefully, she will come back out eventually.

Your T may be able to help bring her back out too.

Take care!!

It does not know when it switches usually till later because it has so many fragments & shards and bes accustomed to being taken over by other entities not part of the vessel itself. Generally it only recognizes specific switching when it occurs with one of the primary selves or self-parts, one of those whats got a name or number distinct from the multitude of fragments. Otherwise the fragments just rotate in the Vortex and shift in & out of forefront slot according to the current velocity of the Vortex (which bes regulated by Leviathan).

that being said ... when all this first started coming to light its primary core/key self part had been "killed" (so we thought) by the emergence of the diametric dualist Twins in succession at ages 16 and 18 respectively (whose origins date to the original splitting trauma at age 3, an event Mal calls "Crack-the-Sky"). She did not resurface until a period of intense therapy in 1994 -- so for 13 years we all just thought she'd died to make way for the first Twin's "spiritual rebirth".

so yeah they may disappear from all access & view but that does NOT mean they bes gone forever. take comfort in this Manda.

Hmm... that so weird. If I think back, usually I know when I switch.
It's almost like I'm half me and half (but mostly) little Manda or something (maybe?)

Have you considered whether this might be another part coming through? It's possible it could be an older Li'l Amanda?

Hmm... no I haven't though about that... thanks for givin me the food for thought.

we sorree thins is bad rite now. lif is NOT fair an that is stinkee. i don lik it eethr.

i stil think u husban tellin brothr abowt lil manda was bad for her. i think it skard her an maybe she hided away. saf is mos importan fing we do. saf is evrefin.

BUT, things can get bettr, is tru an it happent to us an now we werkin on deepr scary stuff wat skars us an hurts, but T says God can help heal an we can get bettr but tha way owt is thru the middl.

we havin hard tim but we goin plases we nevr been afor an so thas a gud thing. we hope u feels bettr soonest. byby

leli pixie

dear lil manda,

you lefts us before we ever even gets meeting you. if you come back we can be friends. we can have a sleepover with ice cream and DVDs like Malady let us have once (after the devil hurted me and wouldnt stop for a long time and we gots scared.) Malady let us stay up late in our jammies and we even got to be in our own bodies, too, so all of us sat in the couch together and watched Dr. Seuss. Four sucked her thum the whole time.

come home to big Manda soon OK?

love,
Six, Four, and Little Dot

Oh wow six, four, little Dot, and leli pixie
Thank you so for your sweet notes to little Manda!!!
I have a feeing ya'll made her very happy wherever she is,
and she will back sometime soon to meet all of ya'll

ilikethosepicttues

same here.

we lik u a lil manda an we reele do fink she not gon she jus not takin rite now.

we gots sum parts wat is gon away cos thay ok now or cos thay in saf hidin plas til thay feels saf an it bees saf for dem to be her wif us.

manda sumwars, jus keep takin an luvin her an she wil cum bak an then nex tim don let nobudy mak no dum remarks abowt her. we not meen to be rude to u, we jus mad at tha bro in law peepl for scarin lil manda.

tak care,

lil pixies

manda...u let lil manda know that we think she is very speshal an she doesn hafta b frad of us...we wont hurt her...an we give very tenner hugs an will sit with her iffn she needs us to an we wont hafta say ne thin...we can even share pookiebear with her so she wont b so scard...

((((((((((((((Manda and Lil Manda))))))))))))))
just let you know that we still sets with you,
still offering gentle hugs, warm fuzzies and a soft blanket to snuggle up in iffen you wants to,
thinking of youl
beads

Jewels... that is the cutest "Maddie" ever!!!
I have a feeling she will be back soon, because seeing that make something insside me go "OOOOOOOOOOOOOOhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh pruuuudddyyyy bug!!!!!!" (little manda's word for pretty)

I dont always remember switching. Most of the time I dont. It is posible that your not remembering it either. Just a thought.

I think lil manda is watching and will be back soon. (((((((manda)))))))

Diana

I hope she comes back soon.
She has been gone for like 3 weeks

Hi Manda...

I don't know....I think you should check out some of your recent posts in the Garden. I could have sworn a few of us were playing with Little Manda in there the other day. We were having a great time!!

Hope it was her!!

Take care!!

OH WOW!!!!!!! It was her!!!!

SHE'S BACK!

thinking of you,

beads

We knew she would not stay gone. We are glad she is back. Yeah and Happy day!!!

The Clan

oh, I am absolutly over joyed!
Erik

We are so glad little manda is found. Maybe she was playing hide and seek. We would miss her terribly if she was lost.

If I may ask, what was she up to? I was worried!
Erik