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#1
May 01, 2021, 07:46 PM
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Hello all, I am honored to be amongst you. I just joined because my wife recently decided to leave me.She has said it before but this time is real.I have been a controlling a hole to her in the past and she wants to not feel that way.I looked in the mirror and understood the man I was and I have begun that change.I have promised my wife change before only for it not to be sustained. We love together and have been married 3 years and I’m not ready to let her go.I want to be a better person for myself and I want her to see the good in me.I have failed her repeatedly and she is just at a point where she just wants to be happy and I am not providing that. I want to be better and I also want to let her go be happy.I am struggling with being here everyday with her and having barely any conversations. I am constantly sad and I just want to have a support system that guides me through this because I’m a loner and I have a counselor who I talk to as well. I am just unsure of what to do and I am trying to give space and leave her alone and not tak about what I’m going through.Thank you for the help in advance
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 Freshly, SunriseSara, Velouria812, Yaowen
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 Skeezyks
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#2
May 02, 2021, 12:07 PM
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Dear Troubledman1989,
I am so sorry you are in the situation you describe. Wish I knew what to say to be helpful or to ease your pain and grief! Hopefully others here on the Forums . . . others more knowledgeable and insightful will see your post and respond to you with something really and truly useful. I am sorry that I don't know how to be helpful to you. What a heartbreaking situation. Sincerely yours, Yao Wen |
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#3
May 02, 2021, 01:02 PM
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Welcome to MSF, Troubledman.
 I hope you find being here on the forums to be of benefit. 
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#4
May 06, 2021, 08:17 AM
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Hey troubled man.
In my experience, space and time is what you and your wife require. Sounds like you need to make changes in the way you treat a significant other, you need time to work on yourself. I’ve been through it too, I put in the work and have learned a lot about myself and how to be happy on my own, to be happy with myself. My relationships from that point have been much more enjoyable and healthy, but still always learning. I didn’t get back with my partner, I found out that I didn’t want to and I have moved on. |
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#5
May 06, 2021, 10:13 AM
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So Sorry you and your wife are struggling! Please do stay strong!
  i agree with the other wise and wonderful posters about you and your Wife needing some space and time. i'd also suggest therapy perhaps or even couple counseling if she wants to. i Hope things will work out overall. Hugs. Hopefully things will improve soon for everyone. Do think about what you both need. Sending many safe, warm hugs to BOTH you, @Troubledman1989, your Family, your Friends and ALL of your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!    
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#6
May 09, 2021, 09:08 PM
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I'm sorry that you and your wife are going through this challenging time. I'm glad you have a counselor to help you process the situation and how to move forward.
You have recieved great advice already. The only thing I can think to add are to make sure you are taking time for yourself for activities that you enjoy. This is am important piece in the process. Take care and wish you the best 
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.
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