[kaylee]

i have always been skinny but i got sick a couple of months ago and lost some weight. i liked the way it made me feel people kept on giving me compliments and saying how great i looked. now i starve myself or only take in about 500 calories a day. i like the way i look but all my friends are saying i am too skinny. i am 5' at 73 lbs i think that is normal for a girl my size i am 20 years old and i think i have an Ed but i don't want to put on weight. if i put on like 3 lbs i freak out because i feel fat. when i look in the mirror i look huge but all my friends are starting to make comments about me being to skinny. most of the time when i do eat it is when i am in front of people to make them think that there is nothing wrong with me. my boyfriend is grossed out about the way my ribs stick out and how he can get his hand around my leg. i don't know what to do i don't want to put on weight and i don't want to vanish into nothing. i need help ASAP. i don't have anyone i can talk to about this.

[silver_queen]

Ummm, I don't know much about EDs but 73lb is DEFINITELY underweight for that size. I'm 5'0" too and I weigh about 110lb. I think the minimum you should weigh for this size is about 90lb.so yes, that weight isn't a normal weight for that size. i don't know what else to suggest, though.

[Genevieve]

Honey, get help now. I'm saying that as someone who didn't get help until I was twice your age, and I"ll say it again: get help now.

Yes, that sounds quite like having an eating disorder. Now how do you get help?

First things first, the help is about helping you with a mental illness which manifests itself physically. You're not getting help in getting fat, no matter how much it may feel that way at first. You're getting help with the mental illness that has the highest mortality rate of all mental illnesses. So start now to remind yourself that you're getting help with general life and health issues, not weight per se.

Are you in school? Are you covered by health insurance? If you're in school, go to the student health center. Otherwise, if you have insurance go see your GP. Say that you're concerned about having disordered eating, and ask for a referral. Then go to the appointment that you make.

Help is out there, and it's helpful. Go see what you find out, and let us know.

[eskielover]

kaylee,

Yes, 25 lbs in 2 months is way too much......hmmm then realizing what is causing it. There are so many things that mess with our eating even physical problems. I would first go to a GP, most important. The first thing to do is determine your initial physical condidion & care for that. If you have become anemic &/or malnutritioned, they need to care for that aspect as the first step. Along with that, the mental aspect needs looked at with by a professional that deals with that. Don't always jump to the first conclusion however. There are other issues that can disguise themselves as ED & sometimes even the professionals will jump to the first conclusion (the simplest) instead of digging. The term anorexia means the excessive loss of weight due to whatever reason. Anorexia Nervosa is the ED as defined in DSM-IV .

I hate to use me as an example but........The first time I had problems with weight loss was due to my body's reaction to several anti-depressants. Like you, I all of a sudden lost this weight & liked looking thin. Like I hadn't been thin enough before that. So I continued to lose weight. I was put into a treatment center & after that for about a year, I was in & out of the medical hospital needing a Central Line with a TPN for nutrition because I was passing out all the time. I am 5'2" and at my worst weight was 85 lbs. To this day, I am not sure how I got out of that situation, but after several years, had gained way too much for my size. I had started losing that weight & getting back into condition with my Dressage horseback riding/showing.

The weight loss was slow & controlled the way it should be. I got down to a weight that was toward the bottom of my BMI & was looking much better until bang.....we had a fire close to our home. The smell of smoke was all over, the nausea set in, & an Asthma attack landed me in the hospital, An allergic reaction to one of the meds I was given created more problems. Just after that I ended up with heat exhaustion which I ended up having a hard time swollowing to top of the nausea that wouldn't go away. Being so close to the bottom of my BMI, I actually had no where to go, but the weight just fell off at that time. Oh crap, the ED is back, since I do like being thin also. The fact that I was seeing my GP for all the other problems, the weight loss was obvious to him also. I actually got stable for a little while just at the bottom of my BMI. But then everything fell apart with my Mothers cancer condition. I have posted about this so won't detail about it. It ended up that the trauma I lived through & am still trying to get through, just blew the "stable" into an unhealthy weight loss. It was a combination of the fact that I didn't have the time to eat & that the nausea has gotten so bad that I have a hard time getting food nor fluids down my throut & smells of anything make the nausea worse. I hate getting sick to my stomach, so have ended up avoiding anything that could cause that feeling. The worse part was that with the weight loss, my Pdoc & psychologist had a problem believing what I was going through (of course, I was having a hard time believing it also). They brushed it off to my not seeing things clearly because of loosing weight. I am glad that APS (Adult Protective Services) & the police didn't see it that way & ended up verifying what had happened.

I ended up in the hospital just before my mother died, sick & exhausted. My GP kept me there for a few days on IV for dehydration, hoping that I would recover. He let me out of the hospital to take care of some business like arrainging hospice care for my Mother. I was still feeling lousy & the weight loss continued. A few days out & he wanted me back in. The night I went back into the hospital was when my Mother died. At least I had a chance to be with her a couple of hours prior to that. While in the hospital this time, they found me to be anemic & my nutritional level was so poor that my GP decided that IV nutrition was required. I was in & out of the hospital 3 more times. Once I had to go AMA for the funeral because the hospital's psychiatrist stated that if I didn't have a central line with nutrition put in, he would put me on a 72 hr hold. I promised my GP that I would go back in after it was over for the central line. During that time, my GP did $60,000 worth of tests to rule out anything physical. The only thing found was that my cortisol level was off & that there was a narrowing in my throat where I had neck fusion done. I had a great psychologist while in the hospital, who seemed to get through to me better than anyone had been able to, but wasn't enough to chase away the nausea & dizziness. It was so easy to say that it was an ED because of the weight loss & add to that the fact that "yes" I like to be thin. They never looked at what was really adding to the problem & that I am glad to be at the weignt point that is safe but thin (bottom of my BMI). Actually at this weight I look like a walking skeleton. It is really embarassing to go shopping in the girls section at 52 even though I buy the XL...(gotta admit, they do have some cute cloths....lol). Most of all, passing out around my horses makes them stress & isn't exactly safe for me.

With everyone grasping onto the ED, I was required to find a treatment hospital that might work this time....talking to them, they realized that their treatment wasn't exactly appropriate & wouldn't help me with some of my major issues surrounding the weight loss. One person from a treatment hospital suggested finding a PTSD treatment center....talked to them & they said that they hadn't treated that type of trauma. I was being sent in circles & the frustration was adding to the nausea & dizziness....the weight loss continues. Everyone was in agreement that I needed to be in some kind of treatment that can also keep track of my physical condition. My pdoc wanted me psyc hospitalized but there was no way I could handle that feeling of being in jail. I have blown off treatment for just over a month & realize that getting better is not within my power....I do need help now for the psychological end of the problem while my GP is monitoring my nutritional level & the ER (close to home) is keeping me re-hydrated when I pass out.

I just wanted you to possibly realize that there many aspects of excessive weight loss & ALL avenues need to be explored before jumping to the conclusion that it is just AN (of course that is possible too). No matter what the cause, it is dangerous & the hospital's psychiatrist pointed that out to me in no uncertain terms given the condition I was in & how I felt & am still feeling.

Please get help....weight wise, you are already below where you should be....IT IS DANGEROUS....yes, your thinking is toward anorexic.....get treatment for all possible aspects. Start by making sure where you are physically, get that stabalized initially & add the psychological help immediately. It is a long process but it is the only way. Even if they find it to be a physical problem, psychological help is important since the desire to be thin is also hard to let go of. If you actually have a body image problem...then that really does need to be addressed since that will mess up recovery also. Being thin is easy to get caught up in since it is hard for most people to acheive & if you dress right, the compliments are there. Being healthy is more important than being thin. However, BOTH can be acheived with the right help.

Keep us posted on how things are going,
Debbie

losing that much weight, that fast, puts a real strain on your body.....and starving yourself can cause heart failure, lack of oxygen to the brain, bingo! stroke or coma.........you're much too skinny for your height. i'm 5' and the least i've ever weighed as 90....please see someone for help. xoxox pat

[mortimer]

All good responses, so I'll just offer my support for you. *hug* If ya need me, just PM.

It's pretty early in it, you have time to get out relatively easily and unscarred. The longer you wait the harder and more dangerous it gets, not to say it isn't dangerous now. Once you start something like this, as you know by know, it consumes you. Go talk to a school shrink hon, or rabbi or pastor if you're the religious sort.

[kaylee]

thanks everyone for the advice i think i am going to go talk to someone i am nervous about it but after seeing that all i am doing is being self distractive i don't want to end up in a hospital. thanks everyone for the info. hugs kaylee