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#1
Jan 02, 2007, 06:08 PM
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hello just found this site,Its good to hear people share with similar problems.I am an overeater and bulimic (past anorexic)I am struggling at the moment. does anyone recover?I hope so.anyway happy new year.
blueflower |
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#2
Jan 03, 2007, 03:59 PM
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Welcome, blueflower!
 (Pretty name!)I don't have an ED, but at the moment I too am overeating after 'dieting' in the summer, and I can sympathise with the frustration it brings. I don't have any advice on dealing with it though, but perhaps others will be able to make suggestions.
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That's why it's such a serious thing to ask a Centaur to stay for the weekend. A very serious thing indeed. - The Silver Chair |
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#3
Jan 22, 2007, 06:57 PM
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Hey there. I'm new to the boards too. Over the past few years, I've been struggling with an eating disorder. At first I was borderline anorexic & then I resorted to binge eating & using laxatives. I still use laxatives & attempt fasts & even attempt just eating normally but it seems like I can't even remember what normal is.
I'm sorry that I have no amazing recovery story but I just want you to know that you can talk to me if you ever need someone. Sometimes it's just good to have someone that understands what you're going through & can relate to you. It is possible to recover though. I don't know if you see a doctor or counselor, but I would recommend it. Stay strong!-- jae |
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#4
Jan 23, 2007, 09:10 PM
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welcome.... I think I'm finally in the very beginning of the recovery stage. I just went thru another horrible binge cycle...I just came out of it. I'm told that recovery is possible but I haven't gotten there yet.
I have renewed hope with this new T ( of about 5 weeks) now. He is very good. I was bulimeic for 1.5 years and for the pass 4-5 years a binger eater of all sugar products.. If you ever need anyone to talk to, PM me...support helps. Take Care |
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#5
Jan 23, 2007, 11:53 PM
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Hey, I'm new here as well...hoping that somehow someone I find on this site will help me recover from the exact problem you have. And so, I was thinking, that if you wanted, we could team up and help one another. I mean, we both go through the same crap, so maybe we can overcome it together too. Just an idea...
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#6
Jan 24, 2007, 04:30 PM
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Hi guys
Thanks for your replies.I feel I am going crazy at the moment.Wish I could say something positive but I cant and I am tired.I am going on holiday in a couple of weeks and want to look kinda o.k -presentable in a bikini.So I started calorie counting again and I havent lost any weight on the scales but maybe I look thinner in the face and tummy.But I feel totally trapped in calorie obssesion.not free at all .and I think as soon as I go on holiday -we will be eating out alot and I will baloon out again.and I am scared of people seeing me balloon.My body dismorphia is getting worse ,2 people commented that I looked good ,or had I lost weight.That makes me feel worse (when they are nicer to me if I am thinner) I want to say -yeah but I am also starving -eating less than a 1000 cal a day and I will gain it all back and more as soon as I have had a normal meal.I only need to look at food and I gain.Anyway I just feel insane like I am banging my head against a wall ,I have felt like this before (worse)but I am just so tired of it .Today I just started shovelling food in my mouth ,partly I think a reaction to feeling so trapped and preassured.I feel on the edge of a binge.In another way though I got some control back past couple of weeks from the overeating .I think when I really looked and measured what I was eating -I can see how I was going overboard before.And whatever I do I need to plan my meals and then stick rigidly to mealtimes-even eating carrot sticks before dinner can set me off .And snacks -maybe I should keep that to the weekend and have a planned fruit snack the rest of the time .I dont know I just cant see a way out of this food weight dillema.I am going to Thailand and will be eating out alot/most of the time and I will put on weight -and actually I know if I give something up (ie.dieting) there is a loss with that (thin body) and its worth it just to feel a bit more human and alive and free .Its just other people seeing me change again or seeing my fat thats the problem.I want to run away to another town somewhere no-one knows me.I know its just gonna take a big dose of courage and grit my teeth and bear it mentality.My weight goes up and down all the time .The thing is this whole e.d started with feeling very unacceptable as a chubby teenager.I felt ugly and worthless so I changed my appearance to be more acceptable ,but I went too far and I lost the real me in the process,my soul,and 15 years later I am still wearing the mask .I feel lost and unreal and like a fake especially when I am counting calories again.But when I am fat I cant even look in the mirror and I wanna kill myself .Anyway I am not giving up ,I am planning to do some ritual next month ,with candles and mint leaves and I am gonna change my name (privately) and I am gonna try to let go and take down the mask and be whole .and heal my self esteem.after I have been to the beach .Anyway sorry I have gone on and on again,can anyone relate to what I am saying?thanks blueflower |
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#7
Jan 26, 2007, 09:46 AM
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Gosh ,what a load of waffle I write(above) .Am eating full time again ,cant even count calories anymore-I just eat my allowance just after breakfast pretty much.Everyday I wake up and say I am gonna stick to my plan and everyday I am putting food mindlessly into my mouth again .It happens when I am cooking and then I start nibbleing and I just crumble and I become so powerless.This is such a powerful addiction.God help me through the rest of today.
blueflower |
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#8
Jan 26, 2007, 11:07 AM
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Hello and welcome to Psych Central. Take care Soidhonia
__________________
The Caged Bird Sings with a Fearful Trill of Things Unknown and Longed for Still and his Tune is Heard on the Distant Hill for the Caged Bird Sings of Freedom |
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#9
Jan 26, 2007, 05:47 PM
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hi Sidhonia,hello Jaeann and Foiledagain.welcome and thanks for welcoming me sorry I seem to mumble almost to myself -maybe I will keep some things to my diary.Anyway hopefully next time I post I will have something positive to say .At the moment I am in a bad way I have been using food like they were drugs -well they are drugs to me .I guess I just gotta keep trying to get better.
Blueflower |
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#10
Jan 26, 2007, 06:37 PM
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Hey blueflower
No need to apologise for what you do or don't say in your posts - it doesn't *have* to be positive things you say! Just write whatever you feel comfortable with
__________________
That's why it's such a serious thing to ask a Centaur to stay for the weekend. A very serious thing indeed. - The Silver Chair |
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#11
Jan 26, 2007, 07:25 PM
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Hi, I am glad I found this site, It is hard to find people to talk to about this sort of thing. I know from personal experience that yes people do recover. I was anorexic for 3 years. I was 30 pounds under wieght and still felt fat. The down side of my recovery is that I am now 60 pounds over weight due to having to take epideral steroids for a condition most likey caused by the anorexia. It is very hard to look in the mirror everyday and not think of how I feel about my wieght but yes i think I have recovered...it was a long road and it took alot of support from my family. The best part is that my hair has finally grown back after falling out from the malnutrition
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