[Raindrizzle]

Sooo....as I have mentioned in other posts, I didn't understand the whole subsituting sugar for actual food.....before.....because now, I understand completely why people do it. Even I have fallen victim to it. I deprive myself all the time of the simplicity of food and eating that all my body craves is the fatty, carb-covered, good food that is completely and utterly unhealthy for you. So I binge. BIG.
Today for instance, I had in about an hour period of time, a bagel with cream cheese, strawberry and creme frozen blend, chik-fil-a salad, large fry, chicken sandwich, chips ahoy package and lots of fruit punch. All of which has ended in the toilet. I was on the verge of puking as I was eating all of this and yet, I still ate it. (all the while i was at work)

Daily now, I eat jolly ranchers, starbursts, little things like that to fill my sugar cravings. It is absolute killer. This weekend is my senior prom, I want to feel skinny for it, I want to look good since there is now added pressure of me being on prom court and then in 2 weeks is graduation! I want to look perfect for all of these events, and all tho whatever I eat gets thrown up and I eat small amounts of sugary substitutes, I feel bigger than ever when I have recently lost 15 pounds......and the weight is the same.....Why do i feel like thiiiiiss iitttt suuucckkksss. I'd kill for a break right now. I want to lose weight more than anything but it seems that i cant stop the binging right now, I dont have the will power to just flat out starve.....

[lil_bit]

Man do i know what you mean. My prom was last weekend, I starved for it and then fell down amidst the dancing...so (among other reasons) i don't recommend that. As far as the sugar goes, i have a MAJOR sweet tooth so lately i've been satiating it by eating sugar..straight. also don't recommend that but i am going to try to pick one or two healthy foods and try to get my hands on those every time i crave sugar. Maybe that would help?

[Oryan]

I understand the sugar instant addiction. Boy, so long as I don't start, I'm fine but if I give in and have like a couple skittles or m&m's it's like there's no stopping.

I've substituted nuts for sweets a couple years ago to loose weight and that has worked. Didn't want my body's insulin keeping my fat cells from releasing energy stores and that's what nibbling on sweets does.

The bad thing is that the salty nuts... cachews and almonds are just as addicting and just as difficult to quit nibbling on as breath mints and other sweets.

Try nibbling on nuts... none salty if possible to get you over or through these hunger humps... saying you can afford those. They are good for you too. The bad thing about the salty ones is that if you eat enough salt, then you retain water, I think as much as a pound for a day or so.

Oryan

[Direction]

I think nuts are pretty healthy food...don't worry about weight changes in day by day increments.

If you have to weigh - weigh no more than once a month. More often puts to much thought into the day to day swings...

Oryan, if at all possible you may want to rethink posting your weight and goals as information about yourself (especially when weight is in hundreds of a pound) - it can be very triggering to those in this forum.

Hi Rain,
I stopped puking and taking laxatives and I've gained back 5 pounds of the 10 I've lost. I've decided if the only way that I can lose weight is by making myself sick then I'm just going to have to be fat because the health consequences of the latter aren't worth it.
All we can do to really lose the weight is to find healthy alternatives to snacking on high carbs and fatty foods. If I have sugary/fatty treats in the house, I'm going to eat them all up first so I have to learn not to allow any sugary/fatty foods into my home. I can stop the binging before it ever begins. Purging and laxatives are going to give you bad health and you'll just gain it all back again very quickly once you stop abusing myself.
(((((((((RainDrizzle))))))))))))
A good cheat for eating something chocolaty without the really fattening calories are those granola chocolate chip bars that are 90 calories each by Quaker Oats. The apples help also.
I don't know if this helps any but do you really want to spend the rest of your life making yourself throw up all the time? It's really gross and it hurts your throat and you'll make it bleed then you'll be throwing up blood. Yuck.
You've got to find a healthy way of doing this Rain.

[Raindrizzle]

THank you so much for the responses! It's so incredibly hard, as I'm sure all of you have previously or currently know. It's just, theres that part of me that would love to completely give up and just starve myself and hide away from the world. But i know i cant....These sugar rushes are so overwhelmingly hard to restrain. Its so much easier to give in and just eat every sweet thing I can get my hands on. But tonight, although I still feel like i ate alot (because for once I have eaten a meal and kept it down....altho it was the only thing I had eaten today) I feel like I made a break through. I was at a outlet shopping center up north of where I live with some friends and we had stopped to get a smoothie at Orange Julius. Well, one of my friends wanted a pretzel as well and she kept pushin me to get a cookie....So I did....I gave in and bought three but only ate part of one and havent touched them since. I'm proud of myself for that!

Slowly but surely, some how, I am going to find a way to lose weight. be happy. be healthy. and be me. Thank you again for the responses esp. Pickle, those granola bars are sooo good! I love them! and Oryan, thank you guys so much!