Confused about Transference

T and I recently discussed how my transference feelings will be dealt with in a gradual gentle way. I'm very regressed in the transference. Then she escalated her urging that my inner child merge with my adult self. This has been an ongoing issue where I have this little alter who hangs back and won't recognize me as her provider. T says over and over how I can provide all my child needs, such as protection, food, caring, love, etc. I hang back because I know the child is attached to T, not me.
I've gotten to the place of despair about the haranguing from T. Now I just want to go in the session and say how I've gotten my inner child to accept me 100% and all like T wants.
This will terminate therapy, as there is nothing else left to do. I've gotten myself into an omnipotent denial attitude to deal with this so it won't hurt too much to leave. Seems there's no use trying to work on transference issues with someone so determined to shove them back into me.
I realize this is pretty complex, but I would still appreciate any comments you all would like to say about it.

Hello, Restin. Why did you seek the assistance of a therapist? Will the course of action you speak up help resolve the issue that precipitated the choice to seek therapy?

Is there no way you and the therapist cannot come to a mutual accommodation that will allow you to receive the help you sought when starting therapy?

I wish you well.

Hello Restin,

Remember you did this thread here http://forums.psychcentral.com/gener...sing-here.html which was the end of May. Let me assure you that the therapy will not end until you feel that you are ready.

The transference work will work through, believe me but it also takes time. The point of the work is for you eventually to have your own internal 'T' , not a parent to your inner child but a T. (The child is attached to T.) So, with the transference at the moment you are still at the stage where the T is external. With good therapy that 'T' will become part of your own system. Please believe me, it happens! Let your therapist know that you know there will come a time to terminate the therapy but you are not ready yet. You will know when that is!

The desire to walk in, saying resolved, sounds people pleasing. Trying to appease, isn't resolution, just frustration with intellectually getting the concept, but the inner strife, turmoil and perhaps outward behavior won't match up. Is it possible to table this aspect, for a couple of sessions, conduct some talk therapy about here and now or even touch upon family of origin, childhood experiences, etc? Then revisit?

Your replies are ideas I havn't thought of yet. My biggest issue is about forcing. I can't tolerate forcing and manage to do it to my own self worse than anyone. I need to make T stop pushing instead of sit there and take it. I agree HealingMe that going there saying all's done just to appease and get her off my back, is a bit cowardly, and not my style, either. Nix to that. Thanks for reminding me. I think I'll just level and say how much it hurt and made me angry.