A 29 year old...

Have you ever considered that she is saying this to make herself feel better? As they say, jealousy makes you nasty and maybe ripping you apart is the only way she can feel good about herself.
I am really sorry you feel horrendous.
(PS. between 30 and 45 is 15 years. Between 45 and 60 is 15 years. So next time she says you are close in age, say: in 15 years i will be 45. What will you be? And walk away. )

She could be saying it to make herself feel better. I was just taken aback as most of her friends are older then me by quite a long way and as I say, she herself is 45 so 15 years older which I wouldn't call close to 29 by any stretch of the imagination.
I just worry she sees me as ageing. I feel like she could be thinking I am behind in life and past it.
You are right with what you say in that although she may feel smug next year, when I am 30 and she is 45, when i am 45,she will be 60 and again, nobody can say that 45 is anywhere near 60.
I wish I didn't feel so bad right now, you are so kind to talk this through with me xx

"Find what you like to do, then do it as well as you can".

That sentence is a typing exercise I probably typed 1000 times, waaay back in high school. Many years later I discovered that the teacher was giving us more than an excercise.

So, find what you like to do. Is it caring for children? GREAT! Find a way to immerse yourself into it, which allows you to grow and develop. Who knows, maybe one day you'll own a chain of very fine daycare centers.

Don't worry about the other stuff, and stay open to possibilities. The right guy will come along at the right time for you.

Good luck!

Thanks. I guess I just feel unnatural and just hate how people see me as ageing.

You can still age gracefully and youthful. 29 was harder for me, than 30. It's a transition year in its own rite.

Did she, other than say getting closer to 45, make crude remarks about your appearance? The ageing process takes a long time, tbh.

It just made me feel sick that she thinks I am near her age, there is 15 years however you want to look at it.
No other remarks, that was enough in itself. No 29 year old wants to be told they are catching up with someone in their mid forties. Joke or no joke.

I am sorry to hear about your encounter with the older woman, many hugs . I can relate to your feeling of "being behind" in life. I feel the same way . I compare what I've done to other young men my age and younger the whole time, and I always think about how much time in my life has been seemingly wasted. But, I learnt it doesn't necessarily work that way. Sometimes a human can do one thing and by one action they overtake all those others "ahead" of them. So, I think we both shouldn't worry about it too much.

I see you are single/unmarried and with no kids too, just like me. I want you to think of it this way. I know many people who got married in their twenties, and now at like 34/35 they are divorced, the man is paying maintenance, the woman is working and they are both trying to find a new partner. Imagine trying to find someone once you're already divorced. You are at least unmarried and have no "baggage". Many guys will find you very attractive. I for one am genuinely (and I'm not saying this because I'm trying to joke with you or whatever) more attracted to a refined and intelligent woman of your age, instead of "girls". Girls my age or younger don't understand me and will never give a guy like me (kind of attractive, introverted, responsible, likes a quieter, more intimate relationship) a chance, they all seek the thrill and excitement that the proverbial extroverted, muscle-buff idiot bad-boy can provide. Trust me, to the right gentleman, you are a huge attraction! I've never even met you and you sound like the kind of woman I would definitely go for. My parents married young (22/21) and their marriage has been a disaster, there's no other word for it. The only reason my mom can't leave is because she is now too old (64), she has NO money of her own, if she takes half of what my dad has, she'll still have nothing, she has no friends to turn to (they were all alienated) and she has me of course, binding her to the man who "made" me.

You did good, even if you can't see it like that. You have avoided all the mistakes that your peers will eventually go through. Being careful isn't always a bad thing. I think you (and I) just need some reassurance in ourselves again.

You are good with children still too, on top of all that. You are definitely desirable. You maybe just need to think laterally/out of the box a little as to where you will find that special man. I think we've both been looking in the wrong places.

All the best to you, you really deserve to be happy, you sound like such a caring and sensitive person .

i went through the adolecent rebellious phase at 25 lol