Should my 20 yr old stepdaughter move in with us?

OP used to post these same things in the Relationships forum until people got tired, she tried the "venting" excuse and then moved to this forum to attract a new audience. And that's all it is-just an audience, no hope of ever changing the situation, just a daily complaint log.

Thanks, Molinit! I seem to recall that too, but I didn't always trust my memory. I'm going to save what little mental energy I have for those who really want help.

sheesh, I thought this was a QUESTION too.

I'm not saying you are a troll, Mapper, because I assume you are a 'real' person. To others on this thread, however, remember...there are trolls on forums.

Yup, you nailed it Molinit! I vent ALL THE TIME!!!! Gotta do it somewhere since I don't talk to my friends or family about it and it's too awkward for me to go to a therapist face to face. It IS a daily complaint log that I can look back on years from now and go "Oh yeah, I remember that". No need to read it if you don't want to And DEFINITELY no need for anyone to respond!

It's a shame you treat all of us this way. Did you miss learning manners while growing up ?

I'm out , you don't deserve a second more of my time.

Wow, its not often I'm shocked, but you managed to do it. Message received! I will never waste another minute of my valuable time reading your posts. I feel pity for you that you view other human beings as nothing more than your own personal sounding board. Even worse you seem to think it's funny....Bye now.

Mapper, I certainly hope you'll find a way to get into therapy. Coming here and abusing people who are trying hard to help you is not acceptable. I, too, am shocked by your behavior.

No wonder your husband prefers to be inebriated all day.

If you met me in person you wouldn't even know that it's me writing this stuff. I am such a meek and quiet and mild mannered person who does everything in their power to help and be friendly to others. This is where I get my anger out. I don't go to therapy because I'm too shy and it's too awkward for me. I have done therapy online but it's still the same as here. They can tell me what I need to do, to speak up, to not be a doormat, but I know before even starting a session that I'm not going to change because I'm too afraid of people (husband, stepdaughter, coworkers, mother)being angry at me for saying how I feel about them. So I just push everything down into the pit of my stomach and act like everything is fine and dandy. Yup, I know it's a bad thing, but it's what I've been doing my entire life and I'm still kicking.

So why not work on your fear of their anger, the root of that fear, and building self esteem to be able to stand up for yourself, instead of jumping the gun and going straight for the jugular...

That's something I have been working on in therapy... Its a process, baby steps.

Mapper, please, please go to therapy. You ARE worth it. Seriously.

This is a me-me-me thing though. What about the unsuspecting people who already are pretty depleted by the time they come here? They attempt, out of the goodness of their hearts, to give you advice and suggestions (because not until you're called out do you say I'M VENTING, NO RESPONSE NEEDED)?

They spent time thinking about and trying to help you with your problems and you slap them in the face by telling them you have no intention of changing and we should all just move along. Then you're actually laughing at us.

It's cruel to your fellow board members and kind of abusive (they way you say you feel abused all the time).

Change your perspective of your "venting" here and in the future if you want NO RESPONSE REQUIRED, start a journal or an online blog. Then you'll never have to worry about anyone calling you out on your crap and the people here can try to help people who WANT help.