Worst advice people have given you, in a phrase or sentence

Actually, mine is, "Stop feeling sorry for yourself."

Yes I've gotten that one too. My next post is going to be in the survivors of abuse forum about emotional response. I have no idea what the proper emotional response is . My emotions are off the hook. I'm also going to talk to my t about this.

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It's just a phase, everyone goes through it. It will pass.

12 years on I'm still waiting for this phase to end

"Let it go," is the worst advice I have ever heard. Every time my mother tells me that I let her know how invalidating it is.

Maybe you're dad meant well but what a **** to say it. Geesh. I think you meant harelip. Medterm is cleft lip. I was born with a genetic syndrome that can include cleft lips and/or cleft palate. Waardenburg syndrome.

Mine worst advice I ever heard is do what you love. Yes I do what I love. Mainly painting. Been in several juried shows including NYC(Soho) but then I look at the example of Ed Wood who did what he loved and made some of the worst movies eve Do what you love as long as you're talented enough to do it. All the loving of any activity won't do a bunch of good if you're incapable of being skilled enough to do it.

THANK. YOU.


So many examples here make me ragefest when I hear them, really...

You just need to relax.
You just need to get over it.
You just need to man up.
Variations thereof. xD

Yep and yep and today
"Medication will mess you up"
Or "your daughter doesn't have a mood disorder, that's just her substance abuse".

They just keep coming!

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Just pay the minimum on your credit card.

Start telling people you are divorced, so they don't think you are a 26 year old maid who was never married.

Go tell those bully girls at school that they are just jealous of you.

To stop drinking, just read religious books.

Seriously? I've had several people say this to me, over the years.

splitimage

Why do you medicate your cat? You know there are other cats! Kill it and get a new one!

I don't understand why you want an "antidepressant that works". Why don't you just go back to how you were before you sought help? (A DOCTOR said this....)

Oh you have lupus! Then you eat wrong. Go on a high fat no carb diet / vegan diet / raw diet / whatever diet and you will be cured! That illness is from poor eating.

Why don't you just move? I don't like your place, no one wants to live here. (But I DO!!!)

I believe you should TREAT yourself more often! (Thanx but as it is my budget goes into the negatives every month, are you paying?)

You HAVE to buy a new bed, the most important furniture is a bed! (Should I STEAL it or will you give it to me?)

I read in a magazine sunlight is good for you. You make yourself sick from not getting up early! (I have tried that for the longest of time but I end up with only 2 hours sleep a night then and after a while I get bad thoughts.... I have DSPS.)

You will lose weight if you stop stuffing your face with candy and cookies! (Thanx for the assumption, I haven't eaten those the last 25 years.)

I've received a lot of advice in my day.......most of it was pretty good.

-You're the inspiration.
-Shut up and dance with me.
-Don't worry, be happy.
-Take it to the limit.
-Get down tonight.
-Let it be.
-Don't go.
-Send me an angel.
-Meet me halfway.
-Don't stop believing.

Going to university will get you a job - said repeatedly by my parents

Just wondering why was it a bad advice?

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Because it isn't true anymore.

I hear this all the effing time from my mother. She went to school in a time where yes, having a degree basically did guarantee you a job, especially if you majored in something in STEM.

I try to explain to her that there's currently a 7.5% unemployment rate among college grads, compared to around 5% several years ago and she literally just screamed WROOOOOOONG! at me. Since I got the information off the internet, it's automatically a lie, while her experiences from 30 years ago are true forever.

This makes it virtually impossible to discuss anything with her, since all the up-to-date information she never looks at is online.

Hi, have you heard the phrase JADE. You don't need to justify, explain, apologize or defend yourself. Often when dealing with out of balance people we feel compelled to do this. Don't. It will only pull you into their dysfunction. Take care of yourself. Don't worry about the others.

Me: expressing my concerns about getting married to someone I felt was too immature to get married to after certain behavior became obvious to me in the relationship.

Mom: you should go ahead & get married to him. He's the nicest guy you have dated & besides the wedding invitations have already gone out. He will grow up when he has to"

BTW....he NEVER did. I logiced myself into marrying him by convincing myself that he was smarter than my dad. High IQ & college degree. He couldnt be the looses I was seeing him to be....sadly he turned out to be worse then my red flags ever imagined.

You still married?

After spilling my depressed guts to someone: "have you thought about getting help?"

I know they meant well but it just made me feel so damaged or something bc I've been "getting help" for years.

when someone does that to me I want to go for the jugular. Be careful who you spill your beans to. There are some really sick people out there. They are called vultures. They prey on people who have suffered a blow.

Back in about 1986: "Ohh, being an anthropologist is not a good job for a woman." (Told to me by a college counselor.)

I left him 9 years ago, but it was after wasting 33 years being married to him. I hid out the first 20 years in getting my degree & in my computer engineering career. The last 13 I lived under the same roof were hell & I couldn't financially get out....trapped at that time. It wasn't until after I inherited my mom's house & was able to sell it & take that money & leave. These last 9 years have been the best years of my life.

"You're too sensitive"!

Yep I could get that tattooed on the inside of my arm,