Advice for Addictive Personalities

I have tried time and time again to break habits on things that have only caused me negative outcomes in a long term sense but though my mind can recognize that these things are wrong, I continue to fall back into these bad habits (whether it be with drugs, desperate searching for validation of my self worth, etc.).

I can't see active therapy in my current situation at least not for a while but I despise not being able to trust myself and really want to know if anyone else who has gone through these things has picked up on healthier habits that they'd like to share for the while I am unable to seek professional help.

Thank you, anything would really be helpful.

Hello azu-nyan: I don't know as there is really a lot I can offer here. But I noticed no one had replied to your post. So I thought I would.

Buddhist literature stresses that we can learn to be with strong emotions of whatever type, without being knocked off balance. In other words, we can learn to sit with such things as intrusive thoughts, compulsions, negative feelings, etc. without being carried away by them. From this perspective, as the Buddhist nun Pema Chödrön has written, those things we most dislike about ourselves are actually our treasure.

I struggle with a lot of intrusive thoughts. And in an effort to not be carried away by them, I employ a Buddhist practice referred to as compassionate abiding. It may or may not be something that will work for you. But here's a link to a mental health oriented description of the practice:

https://mindsetdoc.wordpress.com/201...e-abiding-101/

May it be of benefit.

I actually really like the perspective of this and appreciate you taking time out to produce a reply to me on the matter.

Sometimes having a different take on how you think about things really can help.

The one bit of advice I can offer from working at a homeless shelter is don't try to handle it alone. Addiction is a real thing that infests your mind. If you can't afford a therapist, call your local crisis hotline and ask for guidance in getting free or reduced cost therapy.

Don't give up. Do keep going forward.

I know after this week, I should be going into a 3 day treatment program and afterwards we have no clue where. I am just hoping we're able to figure something out and get me out of this hole I've been digging myself.