[SprinkL3]

What are some of your most embarrassing moments on this forum?

For the short time I've been here, I'd say when I posted something and let too much time go by before the edit button disappeared. Sometimes I'd get a reply, sometimes I wouldn't. Or sometimes I would respond and then realize that I'm responding to something I completely misread.

Tonight, for instance, I thought I was on the game of word association, but it was an actual A-Z game of adjectives. So I answered way off and had to quickly edit it. I'm really tired but can't sleep. I think the craziest things when I'm this way. LOL.

[downandlonely]

Chat is probably the most difficult. I find that some people are triggered by things I say even though I don't mean any harm. Then they get very angry at me.

[Mountaindewed]

I was confused one time about something that I thought I had posted so I quoted it and said “huh. That was weird. I didn’t mean to post that.” But I was actually quoting another members post who just had the same avator as me. Luckily I noticed it and deleted it before anyone else noticed enough to care and comment on it.

[SprinkL3]

I've sometimes said something inappropriate or insensitive, and then I'd forget where I said it so that I could apologize. I do feel embarrassed when whatever I posted and whatever comments followed painted me out to look like someone that I'm not. I truly make mistakes like everyone else. I'm also very open to learning new ways, new things. I may seem opinionated and even polarized at times, but I'm still open to learning how to be more balanced and centric.

[RoxanneToto]

Not checking if someone’s pet was a cat or dog before I posted a comment referring to them (I got the wrong animal lol). No real offence caused but I did a facepalm over it!

Originally Posted by RoxanneToto

Not checking if someone’s pet was a cat or dog before I posted a comment referring to them (I got the wrong animal lol). No real offence caused but I did a facepalm over it!

I mistook a man for a woman once. Easy to do online. My response was like 'you sound like a wonderful grandma." Lol. They chuckled a bit and corrected me.

[downandlonely]

I have misgendered people many times in chat. It's usually laughed off. It's only a problem if you know someone's gender identification and continue to use the wrong pronouns (such as with trans people). Luckily that doesn't really happen on chat because we don't know what people look like.

[SprinkL3]

I've misgendered people, too.

Sometimes disabilities hinder relationships. When I had more energy, I had a lot of friends who matched my energy levels. We used to hang out more frequently, and I had time and energy to spend with them - via phone, online, or in person. But once my disabilities tragically worsened, I had no more time for them. I had to cancel at the last minute, and no amount of explaining could repair our relationships. We steadfastly grew apart. I tried to reach out to them when I had the energy, but they simply ignored me in real life. It was then that I knew how relational losses are part of disabilities.

When I think of the current pandemic and how many disabilities are increasing during this time, I can't help but wonder about the losses that go with those disabilities. Relational losses, monetary losses, stability losses, housing losses, career losses, job (non-career) losses, military status losses, reputational losses, educational losses, health losses, and perhaps even legal losses (such as losing custody, losing a lease, etc.). Sometimes shame and embarrassment are seen as connected whenever we consider losses related to our identities, and whether or not we could save face in a time that is so judgmental.

Then I think about how our embarrassing moments could actually bring about character-building when we consider how such affect our mental health. Do we have enough resilience to bounce back and laugh off our mistakes while also learning from them? Or do we become ashamed, guilt-ridden, depressed, and/or confused about what transpired?

This is a safe space to discuss all of that - the funny and the ugly (no black-and-white good-versus-bad here; just life-based circumstances with a continuum that we all experience - a learning curve, if you will - because life isn't about the all-or-nothing; it's about the here-and-now and the past-versus-present lessons learned).

Be well, everybody!

posting a thread highlighting an issue with the forum, (or an issue I thought existed), only to resolve it myself around 5 seconds later
oops

posting something in the depression section of the site, but messing up the trigger code

I managed to edit it before anyone replied, but still..

I couldn't get in to my account on here, and at the time a lot of people still could and were posting, so I had to use the contact form.

I wascontacted by the site directly (threw my email address), and they fixed it later on in the day.

them oderators and administrators on here are actually really good

and that's high praise coming from someone who is scared to talk to administrators

[SprinkL3]

Originally Posted by raging vortex

them oderators and administrators on here are actually really good

and that's high praise coming from someone who is scared to talk to administrators

They are really good, indeed! That's brave of you to share all of what you shared here, by the way.

[Mountaindewed]

Not really embarrassing but just not getting the level of support that some of the other members get. Like you put a lot of work into a post and it gets zero feedback while the next one is just something random and everyone responds to it.

[SprinkL3]

Originally Posted by Mountaindewed

Not really embarrassing but just not getting the level of support that some of the other members get.

Sorry you are feeling that way. I sometimes feel that way, too. I'm relatively new here though, and what may be comforting for some might be triggering for others. People are struggling with many opposing views and thus relational triggers, if not traumatic ones as well. It's not an easy time for many people to find and maintain support these days. The best we can do is to reach out and continue to try.

I hope you find more support soon.

[Mountaindewed]

Originally Posted by SprinkL3

Sorry you are feeling that way. I sometimes feel that way, too. I'm relatively new here though, and what may be comforting for some might be triggering for others. People are struggling with many opposing views and thus relational triggers, if not traumatic ones as well. It's not an easy time for many people to find and maintain support these days. The best we can do is to reach out and continue to try.

I hope you find more support soon.

Yeah it can be tough to be new and be a member here. This place, at least certain subs can be pretty cliquish. I'm trying to distance myself from them since I just keep getting upset everytime I post.

[SprinkL3]

Originally Posted by Mountaindewed

Yeah it can be tough to be new and be a member here. This place, at least certain subs can be pretty cliquish. I'm trying to distance myself from them since I just keep getting upset everytime I post.

((((safe hugs)))) @Mountaindewed - I'll at least remember to support you when you post - that is, if I'm not too triggered. And even if I am triggered, I'll at least try to say something supportive in return. I do this with my friends in real life, too. Sometimes they will start to share about some details about their traumas that I can't handle, for instance. I have to tell them when it is too much for me to hear, and I feel bad, but I just can't hear that stuff sometimes. But I try to tell them that I can support them in other ways, if they can rephrase what they are saying without the details. If that makes sense.