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Old May 08, 2008, 12:44 PM
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radio_flyer radio_flyer is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2003
Posts: 5,584
3) KETCHUP

A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar.

During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone. "Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle."

***********

4) MORE NUDITY

A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room.

When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover.

The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, "What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?"

***********

5) POLICE # 1

While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old. Looking up and down at my uniform,

she asked, "Are you a cop?" Yes," I answered and continued writing the report. "My mother said if I ever needed help I should ask the police. Is that right? "Yes, that's right," I told her. "Well, then," she said as she extended her foot toward me, "would you please tie my shoe?"

***********

6) POLICE # 2

It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station. As I gathered my equipment,

my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me "Is that a dog you got back there?" he asked. "It sure is," I replied. Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van. Finally he said," What'd he do?"

***********

7) ELDERLY

While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs.

One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, "The tooth fairy will never believe this!"

***********

8) DRESS-UP

A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit."

"And why not, darling?" "You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning."

***********



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10) SCHOOL

A little girl had just finished her first week of school. "I'm just wasting my time," she said to her mother .. "I can't read, I can't write and they won't let me talk!"

***********

11) BIBLE

A little boy opened the big family bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages.

Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages "Mama, look what I found," the boy called out. ; ; "What have you got there, dear?"

With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, "I think it's Adam's
underwear."
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  #2  
Old May 08, 2008, 01:59 PM
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Rhapsody Rhapsody is offline
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Member Since: Jan 2006
Location: Florida
Posts: 9,946
Those are cute sayings....... I never tire from reading them.
  #3  
Old May 08, 2008, 03:31 PM
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TaintedGoth1 TaintedGoth1 is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2008
Location: PA, USA
Posts: 959
LMAO!!!!!

Innocent questions.. Innocent questions.. Innocent questions..

Oh man I really needed this laugh!!! Thanks!!!
  #4  
Old May 09, 2008, 08:55 AM
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recluse1 recluse1 is offline
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Member Since: Mar 2007
Posts: 2,156
((((((radioflyer))))))))
Thank you sooo much for that! Laughter is the best medicine!
  #5  
Old May 09, 2008, 09:03 AM
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sabby sabby is offline
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Member Since: Feb 2005
Location: Southwest of Northeast
Posts: 33,346
Very good! Innocent questions..
  #6  
Old May 09, 2008, 01:15 PM
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inkblot inkblot is offline
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Location: Chicago
Posts: 2,134
I loved these! Thank you! Innocent questions.. Innocent questions.. Innocent questions.. Innocent questions..
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Innocent questions..
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